


Seasons of the Light- Season 11

by Kirabaros



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Drama, F/M, Family, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:13:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 53,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22117678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kirabaros/pseuds/Kirabaros
Summary: Darkness has been released and is on the loose. Sam, Dean and Angela work to stop her and end up with a few surprises along the way. One shot tags to Season 11. Set in the Chronicles of Absolution verse.
Relationships: Sam Winchester/Angela (OFC), Sam Winchester/Original Female Character(s)





	1. 11.01 There Was Darkness... and Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The black cloud was coming towards them and they were stuck. Then Angie finds herself in the middle of a field where she meets the Darkness face to face. And it seems that the Darkness knows her from a time long ago. Tag to Out of the Darkness, Into the Fire.

It was dark outside but not the kind of dark like night. It wasn’t day either but she could see the grasses of the field as she stood in the midst of it. It felt like everything was slowing; it was like being underwater since everything felt warped. The best way to describe it was that Matrix freeze film effect since it just... felt that way.

Angela stayed where she had… appeared? She looked around and reassured herself that she was in the same place she had been when Dean called her and Sam over to… She shook away the feelings of betrayal and anger and sadness that seemed to be a common theme nowadays. It was no use to dwell on the past. Right now she needed to figure out what happened.

She wasn’t exactly sure how she got to where she was. The last thing she remembered was that she had gotten into the Impala, into the backseat and Dean was trying to get them out of there. She remembered: the darkness had been released from the Mark and it was coming straight towards them. It was a thick black cloud…

Angela raised her brow as she looked around. Was she in the darkness? If so, why wasn’t she in the car with Sam and Dean? She remembered grabbing onto both of their shoulders just as the cloud was upon them. Dean had told them to hang on and she literally did. Now she was here and it was…

A sort of chill passed her and it hit the base of her spine. It reminded her of when she had first died from a fatal stab wound to the back. She hissed low and looked around but she didn’t move. She didn’t want to take a step and then end up somewhere on the other side of the state. Rather she looked around with cool deliberateness to find the source. Her hand slowly reached for the pistol she had tucked in her suit jacket and her knife was on her belt. It wasn’t much but it was a start.

The chill came again and it had Angela spin around in place. She felt cold even though her suit was made to keep her body warm; tailored to her specific body type and courtesy of an old friend. The ends fluttered from the still wind and her turning, flaring while she sought her attacker. Her hand gripped her gun but it was pointed at the ground, ready to raise it in an instant. The loose locks of her dark hair fluttered while most of it was held up in the braided coil she had started wearing since it was efficient in keeping her hair out of the way.

_It is chill but that doesn’t mean that it is nothing._

Angela let the though cycle through as she kept her calm. She still didn’t move from her spot and it turned out that she didn’t have to. When she turned after feeling two consecutive blasts of that numbing chill, she saw a sight that was plain up weird but then not weird given the line of work she was in.

The woman was all dressed in black and her hair hung loose in waves. Her back was to her but Angela got the feeling that she could see her. Leaving her weapon lowered, she asked, “What do you want?”

The woman turned to look at Angela with a set of piercing eyes. They looked like they could look into your soul but Angela could see the aged look in them. They weren’t old like how humans got old. No, it was the old soul look; the look of one who had lived a long time and seen many things. Angela knew that look well since she had seen it and she had been accused of having the same look herself. This though was different. It felt different.

The woman continued to stare at Angela but she turned her whole body and started walking towards her. It was like when the demons tried to be intimidating; it was the whole one minute they were standing a few feet from you and the next they were toe to toe. If it was meant to intimidate, it didn’t work on Angela. She merely stared at the woman as she processed what was going on.

“It’s been a long time since we last saw each other,” the woman said.

Angela raised her brow slightly as she replied, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

The woman gave a slight smile as she appraised Angela’s person. “Oh you do. I certainly didn’t forget you.”

Angela had a few interesting things said to her in the past. Some of it was sheer craziness. Others it was crazy but there was truth embedded in it. One thing was for certain and it was that Angela had a pretty good grasp of her memories unless they were deliberately scrubbed. She didn’t recall seeing this woman. “I don’t know you,” she repeated, “but I know what you are.”

The woman looked at Angela and frowned slightly. Her eyes moved as they appraised Angela. Slowly she started circling Angela and looked up and down her person. “Hmm… you look just as you did when we first met. Same appearance… hair… though why you look like them…” The woman came back around to face Angela and look her in the eyes. “You are how I remember but…”

It was reaction when the hand reached out to caress her cheek. Angela may have mellowed over the years when it came to friendly pats and gestures but she was still very sensitive with it came to evil’s bitches touching her. Her eyes flared and her teeth elongated in response to the chill and the… darkness that she felt.

The woman took her hand back in surprise but she didn’t back away. Instead her old eyes studied this new development. She took in the fangs and the eye flare and nodded. “Now I see. You don’t remember.”

“I don’t know you,” Angela hissed. She didn’t retract her teeth but opted to leave them out as more of an intimidation factor and to show that she was ready to fight if necessary.

“You don’t remember but I do. I never would have though He would have been brazen enough to do this to you.” The woman gestured at Angela like she was a ruined piece of artwork. “But it makes sense. Where is your other half?”

Angela didn’t say anything. She knew what that referred to and she wasn’t going to do anything to harm Sam. She didn’t know what the woman was referring to and opted to let her do the talking. She didn’t understand what was going on and it was a bit terrifying.

The woman waited but when it was obvious that Angela wasn’t going to respond, she gave a slow smile, “Still protecting him and no doubt he protects you. It was why I couldn’t corrupt you.” She took a step forward and boldly put her hand on Angela’s cheek. “Tis a shame that you were sent here and as one of those things. But it makes sense.”

Angela finally moved and deftly moved the offending hand and flung it aside. She lifted the hand with a gun and gestured with it. She still was in a position to shoot it if it came to that. “I really don’t know where you are going with all this but I will make this clear: If you intend to harm the people then you will be met with resistance.”

“Exactly what I expect from you. You always were one to protect the innocent. It was why He created you, but he didn’t expect your twin to develop.”

“I mean it,” Angela continued on her speech. “I know what you are. You are the darkness and I could kill you now.”

“But what is stopping you?”

It was a taunt and Angela rose to the bait. She pointed her gun at the darkness and fired. She made the hit and it was fatal heart wound. The woman looked down and then up with a pout, “Ouch.”

Angela felt her eyes widen slightly. Iron was usually effective but this time it wasn’t. She made to pull her knife. Chopping the head off seemed like a good idea.

“That won’t work either,” the darkness replied shaking her head. Her expression became one full of sorrow. “It is a pity that it was taken from you.”

Since the gun wasn’t going to work, Angela put it back in her suit jacket. She huffed a little bit as she straightened her suit out and looked at the darkness. “What do you want?”

“To thank you.” The darkness looked at Angela and noted the confused expression. She explained, “You found the one that set me free.” She gave a short laugh and continued, “Funny that you should be the one to imprison me and also find the one that set me free. Sounds like poetic justice considering I did kill your twin.”

“I really don’t know what you are talking about but I’ll listen to your rambling.” Angela knew she wasn’t going to get anywhere protesting against knowing the darkness. It was just better to listen and eventually she would find out more information about what she was dealing with. It was just like any other job but it did feel different.

“You do know. It is buried in that head of yours somewhere.” The darkness reached up and touched Angela’s forehead with the tip of her finger, gently. “You know it should be that I should kill you since you did imprison me but I can’t kill you. Not yet at least considering what you did.”

“What is it you think I did?” Angela couldn’t help but ask in that manner that held a hint of amusement but it gave the impression that you should talk since she wasn’t in the mood.

“You did something. Dean Winchester is bound to me; he can’t kill me any more than I can kill him. But you did something. It’s like your presence taints it.”

Angela merely blinked at that. She knew what she had done when they caught Dean when he was a demon. She had treated the sanctified blood in a similar manner she had done with the vial she had given Sam before he said yes to Lucifer. It was a gambit and it proved to be helpful while they worked to be rid of the mark. It seemed that there were other consequences to it. That was the story of her life. She said nothing but stared.

The darkness was confused by the whole thing. “What have you done?”

“What I must. Just the same as I will do when I find the means to kill you.”

“You can’t kill me. You couldn’t then and you won’t now.”

Angela gave a slow shake at that. “No, but I will be able to do what I must to protect the innocent. You come after them and I will come after you.”

“No you won’t. If you interfered, it would be like Dean. You’ve crossed the line to dance with me.” The darkness reached out and started caressing Angela’s cheek before leaning in to take a sniff. She took a deep breath. “Oh you even smell the same. This will be fun.”

“And I look forward to kicking your ass.”

“Bold words. Let’s see how well you fare in this existence. And I look forward to meeting your twin in his incarnation.” The darkness smirked at Angela.

Angela turned a steely gaze to the woman known as darkness. As much as she would have liked to lash out, she wasn’t going to put Sam’s life in danger by naming him. She still didn’t have the whole picture and she still had the boys to find and worry over. “Whatever you are talking about, we will settle it between you and me.”

“I doubt that. Your twin wouldn’t let it go the first time,” the darkness taunted. She gave a slow smile, “And he won’t again. He’ll die like the last time.”

“Not going to happen if what you say is true.” Angela was careful with what she said. Besides she knew the truth that Sam would give his life to save hers if it was possible.

“It will and I look forward to that,” the darkness replied. She looked around at the cloud that was swirling around. “As much as this is fun, there is one other person to see.” She held up her finger to halt Angela from speaking. “Now I know what you are going to say but know this: I will never harm Dean. He is bound to me as I am to him but try to interfere and you will suffer.”

“Bold words for you,” Angela allowed. “I look forward to ramming them down your throat.”

The darkness smiled, “We’ll see.” She clicked her tongue and smacked her lips slightly. “Still the same light sent to battle darkness and now a being that has danced with darkness.”

“Just go.” Angela turned to look at nothing in particular. She wanted the thing gone. AS much as she didn’t want it to talk to Dean, she had little choice. She was at a disadvantage and she needed to wait until the status quo shifted to a more favorable condition. There would be time to deal with it later; live today and fight tomorrow.

“I will but I want to leave you with something special.” The darkness smiled when Angela turned to look at her with the demand she reveal it. She added, “After all you don’t remember our time together so I will simply leave you with a small taste.”

Angela was unprepared for the feeling that the darkness’ touch gave her. She felt the chill to her forehead and she hissed and closed her eyes. When she opened them, she was no longer in the field but it looked like some valley or gorge. There were boulders everywhere but there was a clearing… like a fighting ring.

She was kneeling on the ground, a bloodied head in her lap. She couldn’t see the features yet but she felt angry. She looked up and saw the darkness in a warrior’s garb, looking at her with a smug look of satisfaction and saying, “A pity. He was fun to play with.”

Angela watched and it felt like she was doing the same action as she stood up and went to face the darkness. From there it turned into a fight that was… Angela had been in fights before and they had been violent and bloody. This was different. It felt real, like it was her memory and she couldn’t get out of it. She watched as she swung her blade and made contact and felt the same from the darkness to the point where they both lashed out with their powers.

She felt herself use her abilities to slam the darkness into the mountainside and lightning crashed in the sky. She heard voices in a language that she was certain she wasn’t supposed to know but she did. She tried blinking to make it end but she couldn’t. All she could see was the darkness bleeding from the injuries she dealt and feeling angry and… was it hatred?

There was no relief until she felt the familiar warmth of Sam’s hand touching her shoulder. Angela gasped the moment she felt it and heard her name. With a blink, the whole thing had disappeared and she was standing in the field where she had first encountered the darkness. She blinked again when Sam’s face came into view looking at her with concern and she saw Dean standing there looking at her to see if she was okay.

“You, okay Angie?”

“Yeah,” she replied absently as she frowned a little and looked around. There was no sign of the woman but it felt like she was lingering. “Just peachy.”

It took some time to convince the boys that she was fine and she mentioned that she saw a woman. From Dean’s reaction, she knew that they had seen the same woman and she knew Dean didn’t tell the whole truth. She knew both Winchesters well and she understood why; they knew nothing of the darkness but she knew them and it was disconcerting. She never liked facing an opponent she knew nothing about.

But that wasn’t all. Apart from being a new entity to contend with, Angela couldn’t shake the feelings from what she saw and felt. The chill of the darkness’ touch was numbing and then that vision where she felt hatred and anger… She had never been that angry before and she didn’t really hate people. For the first time in a long time she was going to have to do things differently from before and the cost was going to be high. For the first time… she was afraid.

_The light has come to dance with darkness…_


	2. 11.02 A Light When Others are Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darkness had a conversation with Angie and it hit deeper than she let on. She will do her job and help people but it seems that the road has just gotten more complicated. Tag to Form and Void.

The hour was late and the bunker was quiet. Whether or not that was a good thing depended upon the circumstances surrounding it and given the current state of things it could be called a respite. That much could be said for Angela as she sat in the chair that she had rooted herself in for the long run. She sat there, studying her hands while occasionally glancing over at the bed in the room turned into a makeshift cell.

They had managed to save what was left of the town from the mysterious illness that plagued it. It had been Sam that found the hints of using holy oil to create holy fire. And that was after the painful vision or sign he received though it could have been a sign of the infection taking root. Yet she received the prompting to use her healer abilities to take control of the flame and directed it towards purifying the taint in Sam’s blood. The how and why was still baffling even after she managed to do it to the infected ones Sam lured into the chapel in the hospital and then the town.

Being a healer was something that she was born with. Why her, a dhampir, a creature of the night... that was the enigma. But she never hesitated to give as needed. She healed wounds and souls. Even Gadreel was healed by her hand and he was a bastard and killed Kevin while using Sam as a vessel. That bothered Sam still though he hid it well. Now she was focused on helping Castiel.

The angel made it back to the bunker trembling in pain. From the bloodstains on his clothes, it didn’t take much for her to guess that he had been tortured. She had been tortured herself and her lip had curled involuntarily in anger at the treatment of her angel. Yes, Castiel was her angel and if he wasn’t stubborn about leaving her alone she would have been first on the train to help him when he was in trouble as he had done for her. He was her angel and forget the technicalities of the guardian angel duty crap, he was family to her.

The shuffle on the bed had her look up. Castiel was shaking and he had fever sweats. He had returned to the bunker begging for help. Being ever the healer, she pushed her way in to determine what was wrong. Neither Winchester protested since comparatively she knew more about angel physiology and it helped that Castiel told her what happened but it was in Enochian.

Getting up from her seat, she went to check on the angel. Leaning over, she reached out with her hand and felt his forehead, taking in the sweating, the shaking and not liking that she was sensing the power behind the spell that had been unleashed on him. She was going to kill that witch bitch Rowena and she was going to make her suffer like she made Castiel suffer. It was unlike her but she had enough. She had to force herself to calm down and she sent soothing waves to ease the angel’s discomfort before moving to pace around the room.

Looking around, Angela thought about the things that had happen, were happening and the prospects of what was to happen. More than once she had questioned her purpose in being on this earth as long as she had been. By now she should have been a full-fledged crazy bitch and sucking people dry but she wasn’t. She was alive and kicking doing what she had trained to do and that was saving people, hunting things… the family business.

_You always were one to protect the innocent._

Angela let out an involuntary shudder as she recalled her conversation with Darkness. She rubbed her upper arms as the disquieting chill hit her spine. At the same time, flashes of the memory she had been given moved through her mind. It was painful and felt very real… like it belonged and not just a vision. She hissed quietly as the images of her fighting flashed through.

She had pulled memories before but the consequences were that sometimes it was difficult to separate what was yours from the one you pulled. But this had been different. She was given a memory and one that felt like it was her own too. It had her worried and scared; like she was now getting her fast track into insanity or something worse… like the void the reaper Billy threatened to put Sam in.

_It was a courtesy to you that we masked our presence but now… it is up to the reaper nearby._

She hadn’t wanted Death to be ganked. It surprised the hell out of her that Dean did that and she thought of the ramifications of that. At the reaper she looked at it and said that she understood the job of reapers but she will fight if she perceived a threat and that was a promise. She would leave the reapers be; live and let live and that seemed to appease that reaper. With the others… that was in the realm of the unknown.

Angela let out the breath she was holding. The chill was still there and it had her shiver. She chewed her lower lip as she remembered that conversation. She could remember every word and every touch and caress Darkness gave her. It had her start to breathe a little heavily like she was going to go into that panic attack mode. Luckily they had been finally able to ‘cure’ her of her Purgatory problem but she still felt… unsure and off.

_You know it should be that I should kill you since you did imprison me but I can’t kill you._

Angela shuddered at that. She had done things to imprison certain beings. Yet she had never confronted Darkness before. Yet she was saying that she imprisoned her. Why would she say that? Was it to mess with her? It wouldn’t be the first time. She ran a hand through her hair as she tried to rub out the pain from the memories and the words and their chilling effects.

_Why me? Why is this happening?_

She rarely questioned what was happening to her and just accepted it, agony and all. Mostly it was because she still harbored the notion that everything that happened she deserved in order to receive penance. But this was different. She was being accused of something she wasn’t involved with and had no memory in existence of and against something that was very, very old and knew her… and she knew Sam.

Darkness referred to him as her twin. That was in reference to the fact that they were true souls; once one soul that divided creating two separate souls and each carrying a piece of the other inside of them. She thought it a romantic notion until she was literally faced with her other half and Sam met his. They still didn’t know much about it and kept it between them and Dean and a few choice others. But Darkness knew about it and seemed to derive a pleasure from it.

_Sounds like poetic justice considering I did kill your twin… And I look forward to meeting your twin in his incarnation._

It was referenced to the past but Angela was astute enough to recognize it as a threat too. It sounded ridiculous that she should be scared of a memory but the truth was her greatest fear was losing Sam and her fear of being alone. She had shown bravado and did what she could to deny she knew about her connection with Sam but inside she was scared and didn’t know what to do. And what did she do? She said nothing about it. Oh she did tell the brothers that she had met Darkness and that they had a conversation that was more posturing but she didn’t give details. Partly she didn’t want to have Sam in fear or worry about watching his back every time he stepped out of the bunker. The other part was that she was unsure and afraid and she didn’t know what to do.

She knew that the Winchesters didn’t mean to drop things on her like she had all the answers. Usually she had something for them because she lived a long time and if she didn’t, she suggested research, a task she and Sam enjoyed and she got a few laughs when Sherlock became involved. Sam especially tried hard to not take her for granted; it was a life mission from who knows when and he was constantly working to ‘make it up to her’ for whatever it was he perceived he did. They knew she didn’t know everything and she would be the first to say it. This though… They had enough problems and her current one was the angel.

Turning her attention to Castiel, she saw he was in a fairly good sleep. It was an oddity since angels really don’t sleep but it was necessary and the room was warded in a certain way to prevent mishaps. Neither Winchester liked it that she willingly was staying there alone but they accepted it. At least one thing was being worked on.

She sat back down in her chair, rubbing her forehead. She adjusted her position and just watched the angel. It was a little creepy but she didn’t want to sleep. She would rather sleep when she couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore. She sat and stared until she found herself opening her eyes.

She hadn’t meant to fall asleep and cursed herself for that. She got up and made sure that things were okay and they were but something was off. She sensed it and looked around but it wasn’t in the room. She heard whispers. And they were coming from outside the room. She stood in front of the door and stared at it as the whispers called to her.

Glancing back at the sleeping angel, she looked forward and put her hand on the door to open it. She found Shadow, a new puppy sleeping by the door. He didn’t even stir when she stepped through and that was alarming to her. But her attention was drawn to the whispers that were calling to her. Common sense told her not too but she followed the whispers and it felt like she should. So she walked through the bunker, her step silent from the years of practice.

She walked through the bunker and down towards the dungeon. As she got closer, the whispers grew louder. When she was at the door, they were the loudest and practically screaming at her to enter. She did and slowly walked in until she was standing in the middle of the room. She didn’t even flinch when the door to the dungeon shut behind her with a decisive clang. She did look around and took a breath before saying, “Is this your way of torturing me? I don’t know you.”

The whispers still circulated but other than that there was no response. Angela looked around trying to figure out what was going on. She demanded, “What do you want from me? Who are you?”

The whispers kept going on. They grew louder and started talking in tongues. They were different languages with some considered dead and others… Angela put her hands on her temples. It was like hearing more than one angel talk to her in their true voices. She had never heard so many languages at once and her head was aching worse than remembering her conversation with Darkness.

_Daughter…_

_Created…_

_Fight…_

_Protect…_

_You always protect the innocent…_

It was a jumble of voices from memories of people she had met and from her recent encounter. It was cut and pasted together to make complete sentences. She had shut her eyes to block it out but she kept hearing it and she was seeing the people who were associated with those phrases. It was painful since some weren’t even speaking in the language she had heard it in and it started going faster and faster.

Gritting her teeth and crying out in pain she forced her eyes open and it seemed that time stood still. It was like she was back in that field but she was in the bunker. In front of her was Darkness looking at her and smirking at her as she said, “He protects you as you protect him… He created you… always one to protect the innocent…”

Angela stared at Darkness as she stood there. Everything was moving in slow motion as the wind swirled around them in the bunker. Then it froze. Darkness was standing still, not moving. Angela stared back until it felt like she was launched forward and she relieved the memory again but it was coupled with another. She was looking as Darkness was running from battle and she called, “You come after them and I will come after you.”

She didn’t hear the reply since a bright light had started to grow. It had Angela thinking that she was dreaming or something since this was way too weird and felt more like a movie. And yet it felt very real as she felt determination and anger that Darkness was getting away again. What was going on?

She was so busy paying attention to that scene that she didn’t see the light until it was upon her. It was too bright and she put up an arm to shield her eyes as it grew brighter. It became too bright and it was hurting her eyes. She shut them to protect them but became enveloped in darkness and she heard a voice. It called to her and it was telling her something. It was something important… about darkness and light.

Angela sat up with a gasp and looked around wildly while struggling with something that was wrapped around her arms. She growled slightly as she struggled to free herself. She had to get free.

“Angie, it’s me.”

That gentle voice woke her up and she realized that Sam was holding her. She paused and frowned and took a moment to realize she was on the floor. She looked around trying to puzzle out what happened. As she looked around, she got flashes of her… whatever that was… her memories playing through, the memory Darkness gave her. It was intermittent with what she was seeing in the room.

Something on the look on her face prompted Sam to ask, “Are you okay?”

Angela didn’t answer right away but paused to look at nothing in particular as she recalled the last thing she saw in the bright light. Saying nothing, she wrapped her arms around Sam and hugged him tight, not wanting to let go. She knew there was a fight coming but it frightened her where it was going and what she would be called to do.

_Still the same light sent to battle darkness and now a being that has danced with darkness._

_The light for others when all others go out…_


	3. 11.03 The Frightened Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas has been cured but it just a little thing in the bigger picture and he notices it with his charge and learns about what she learned from Darkness. Tag to The Bad Seed.

_It was like being on a hunt; the thrill of the chase and seeking out your opponent and using your skills and knowledge to track and take down your prey. It was a thrill to baser instincts but not so much fun when it was being used against you. Of course that is a thrill of a different kind._

_Angela peered around the crates and took a tentative sniff. She could feel the trembling girl underneath her hand and she patted her on the shoulder to reassure her. She would do what she could since the spell was putting Castiel, her angel, on attack dog mode and she knew that once relived of it he would remember everything._

_“Please. I just want to go home,” the girl whispered tearfully._

_Angela looked at the girl and said, “It’ll be fine.” A noise caught her attention. It was loud enough for her to hear but a normal human wouldn’t have. “When I say go, you run like hell and don’t look back.”_

_Sure enough Castiel found them. He made a beeline towards the girl but Angela got in the way. She grabbed a hold of the angel and shouted for the girl to run. She didn’t see if the girl left since attention was on the angel that was looking at her with that attack dog rage. She grunted, “Stop it Cas. Stand down.”_

_She didn’t let go and at some point she felt the angel’s hands on her throat. He was slowly choking her but she was fighting and it was slowly becoming a battle that was being lost. She still fought though and then Dean came in and somehow wrestled the angel off her. But that didn’t slow the angel down until…_

_“It has been fun little aingeal and I hope we get to enjoy another round without the company of the Winchesters.”_

_Angela felt rage that was almost the same when Sam had died. She wanted to tear Rowena into little bloody pieces. She grabbed the grating and yanked hard. It was enough to make a dent as she growled at the witch._

_“I definitely will see you next time.”_

_“And I will kill you.”_

_“I’d love to see ya try.”_

“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you use your healer powers.”

Angela leaned against the railing of the staircase that led into the bunker. It was one of her favorite places to just observe from. She got a nice view and sometimes she just liked to watch the Winchesters go about their business; it reminded her of when she used to watch from afar. It felt good to remove herself and have things play out without her involvement.

She had come there to think after she took care of Dean’s face courtesy of Castiel under and attack dog spell. A lot was still on her mind even though her first priority was taking care of her angel. Now that the spell was gone, she could think and try to figure out what was wrong with her and what the deal was with Darkness. It was inevitable that the angel would find her but she didn’t mind. She looked at him and replied, “Just doing what needed to be done and I’ve used them before.”

Castiel peered at his charge as she leaned against the railing and leaned with her. “I haven’t,” he replied in a gravelly voice. “You’ve gotten stronger.”

“Had to if I was going to cure Sam and those people.” Angela looked ahead and tapped the railing with her fingertips before saying, “After Darkness was released, there was an illness that came and turned people into mad killing machines. Black veins lined their blood and you got infected by ingesting an infected’s blood. Sam killed a nurse that was infected.”

Castiel listened and put the pieces together even though his mind was tired from the spell. He knew that she was baring her soul and it was a rare thing for her. “Sam was dying. You did what you’ve always done.”

“I didn’t know what to do except treat symptoms and help him with the others. I wouldn’t leave him and not ever. Always and forever… but I don’t know everything Cas.” She looked at the angel as she clasped her hands together. She took a breath and continued, “The only way I helped was after Sam received a vision of what would work but I was compelled to add my own touch and it worked on him and the people.”

“You have become more powerful,” Castiel replied after a spell. “You always were a healer at heart. Joshua spoke of it when I was given the assignment of watching over you. That you had a healer’s heart that was protected by the hardness of experience.”

“An interesting way of putting it.” Angela couldn’t help but smile at that. “But what good is it if I can’t even help you. I couldn’t break the spell that bitch Rowena cast and I have no idea what to do about Darkness.”

“You were the one that said abilities are like learning to walk. I believe that you said to Hibah.”

“And I am surprised you remembered that. I knew you were a softie with her.” Angela grinned at the angel and raised her brow slightly.

“We have a bond because of her father,” Castiel replied looking like he was affronted that the relationship was anything but that.

Angela knew that and she loved teasing the angel since she made him hold her and he did what he had to do to protect her. “Still that is good advice but I don’t know Cas. I don’t know how it will work out and Darkness…” She lapsed into silence.

Castiel took in the silence and then said, “Darkness is not a burden for you to bear alone. We are all working on how to fix it.”

“Not this,” Angela replied as she shook her head slightly. She looked down to see Sam and Dean interacting and she gave a gentle smile at the scene. She missed those moments.

_You always were one to protect the innocent. It was why He created you… You’ve crossed the line to dance with me…_

Angela sobered as she recalled her meeting with Darkness. Softly she said, “I met Darkness, Cas. And… and she knew me… but I don’t know her.” She looked at the angel with a worried expression.

Castiel took in her words and it had him baffled as well. He did know of the battle to imprison Darkness in the Mark of Cain but the details were always elusive. He offered, “It is possible that she heard of you from Cain and then Dean by wearing the mark.”

“No Cas. She knew me like I know you.” Angela pursed her lips as she flexed her fingers in their clasped position. She adjusted her posture to try and figure out what to say next. Finally she decided to come out and say it, “She gave me a memory. Of me and her fighting a long, long time ago.”

Castiel frowned at that. It was alarming mostly because he was sensing her distress and it was high. Yet she was showing a calm demeanor. It was a testament to her inner strength but the angel knew that it wouldn’t be what it was today without the Winchesters, especially Sam, by her side. She had survived but now she lived. Yet this was different. “But you know what is yours and what is not.”

“True but this was different. I know how to tell the difference between a memory belonging to someone else and my own. This felt like it was my own but I have no memory of it.” Angela looked at the angel and added, “I don’t know what it means.”

Castiel didn’t know what it meant either and it perplexed him that she didn’t go to Sam about this. Or both Winchesters for that matter. She always did. “I don’t know either. Have you spoken to Sam?”

“That I can’t do. Not yet.”

The silence became a bit unnerving even though they had always enjoyed each other’s silent company. Castiel knew something was wrong and it bothered him. “Why?”

“Because… Darkness knows about true souls and since she knows me… knows that I am one.” Angela paused a moment before adding, “And that I have my other half. How much she knows… I don’t know but I didn’t tell her anything.”

“And you’re afraid of what she might do to Sam.”

“Cas, she said she killed my twin in that life she thinks I was a part of. And she made a promise.”

“What kind?”

_I look forward to meeting your twin in his incarnation._

_Your twin wouldn’t let it go the first time. And he won’t again. He’ll die like last time._

“What kind?” Castiel asked again a little more forcefully. He saw she had slipped into a thoughtful mode or was remembering something.

Angela looked at Castiel and replied, “That she’ll kill him. She had done before and would do it again.” She paused and looked away to try and put together her thoughts into words. “I know that we have taken care of threats like this before but Cas… this feels different.

“Believe me, If Sam and Dean were threatened I’d take care of it but this… When I first met her, I got this cold shiver and I didn’t like it at all. It was cold, calculating I think and just the fact that she has the advantage of knowing me by I don’t know jack squat… I’m afraid, Cas.”

That much the angel could figure out. The trouble was, he had never seen her like this before and it had him concerned. He didn’t know what to do but he realized she had come to him because she wasn’t certain how to explain it to the Winchesters. He was hardly qualified for a heart to heart talk but he felt compelled and he wanted to help her out. “I… I don’t know what to say.”

“Just being someone to listen is a lot,” she offered, “And what I needed. I know I need to tell them at some point but… especially Sam.”

“At least speak to Sam. It’s his life and I know he would do anything for you and with you. You aren’t alone.”

Angela couldn’t help but giggle a little. “You really did pick up a bit hanging around Metatron. That is the one good thing I can say about him.” She smiled at the angel. “I’ll talk to Sam. I just… needed help making sense and it still doesn’t.”

“I will do what I can. You are more than a friend.”

“Already taken, Cas,” Angela joked before giving the angel a hug. “But thanks all the same. I do need to know if it is true… about me and Darkness.”

“It is possible it is a trick.”

“I know but… I have to be sure especially that weird dream or vision I had before you bolted on me and I chased after you.”

Castiel coughed uncomfortably. “That was… it was a spell.”

“I know. The timing just seems coincidence and just plain a pain in the ass. What’s next? Me getting pregnant?”

Castiel had no answer for that and watched as Angela started down the stairs. He observed as she went to do what she always did and that was to take care of the bunker… like a housewife. As disturbing as that thought was to him, that was the best way of describing it. He watched as she stepped up to Sam and it was like the whole atmosphere changed and noted the way how Sam seemed to light up the moment he saw her. It was a rare and beautiful thing.

She was afraid. That much was clear to the angel as he watched Angela lead Sam off for what they called taking a walk. True she had faced threats against Sam and Dean before but she was scared. And he understood what she where she was coming from. This Darkness knew his charge in a personal manner and he suspected that their encounter was more than what she had described it to be. It had him angry at that.

While it was a possibility that Darkness was putting fear and doubt into his charge by claiming to know her, Castiel couldn’t shake the idea that it might be true. It wasn’t breaking news, as Sam put it, that Angela’s soul had previous incarnations since they discovered one was in ancient Egypt. It was possible to have a memory suppressed to the point that it was like it never existed, but an entire life? That was something he intended to look into and it kept him in thought as he watched the three of them interact below.


	4. 11.04 Secrets of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is one 'person' in the lives of Winchester and Co. that knows everything in the family business. Tag to Baby.

It is possible to be part of a family and yet be the silent observer of it all. To know the trials and tribulations, the joys and sorrows, the moments that defined relationships… it was possible to be a part of it and keep those secrets. It was something she was good at. She was the one that listened when everyone thought there was no one else.

She had been loved by the father and then the son afterwards. She knew his secrets and she knew how lonely he was without his brother. She heard his inner monologues. She went with him to the source. She comforted him with his other means did little to nothing. Then the brother joined.

It was like old times. She remembered when they were children. She kept fond memories. She remembered when Sam stuck the army man in the ash tray. The Legos that rattled when she rolled… she loved it still. Then there were Sam and Dean’s initials. It was her ‘ink’ so to speak as part of a pledge to each other. She was proud to witness it.

Then there was the dhampir. She knew her from before when the dhampir came to help the father. Then there was the occasional check on her systems when no one was looking. The dhampir cared about her. It was what bonded her to Dean even after the disagreements. And the angst that followed.

The dhampir came back and it was like greeting an old friend. She missed her and certainly Sam missed her. They belonged together, not apart. She knew that since they first met though it wasn’t obvious at first. But she knew.

She knew their inner thoughts and fears and hesitancies. It was funny and maddening when the wires got crossed. If only they were easy to fix as one of her blown wires. And the dhampir knew how to do that. Oh her touch was wonderful, like that of a mother. If she was the mother, Dean was the father. They both cared and she wasn’t jealous of her sister Deanna. The dhampir became Angela after that and she was the one that confided in her the most.

She knew Angela’s feelings about Sam and how she tried to balance doing her job and giving in to her feelings. She heard the silent tears of sadness, loneliness and… She heard everything even when the others were in here with her. She spoke louder than anyone who had ever ridden in her and not every one could see. It took two years for Sam to see clearly. Once he did, it was a whole other ride and one she enjoyed thoroughly.

The conversations between the two of them, she was privy to it and she loved it. It was like watching a beautiful secret develop. She was privy to their feelings and thoughts that they were only able to share with each other. She listened and she kept their secrets. Including the ones that involved fears and the latest were the worst.

She knew Dean had suffered the Mark of Cain and that Sam was doing anything to get rid of it to help his brother. They got it removed but at a cost and it was scaring Angela to no end. She could hear it in her voice as she listened to the conversations about what happened when the black cloud enveloped her. She didn’t like it. She didn’t like how it made her mother and father feel.

At least things were looking better on this job. Dean was joking with Sam again and Angela, she was content being with Sam. She watched Dean go to try and score while Sam and Angela took off towards the diner. She knew they would be back… and she was right.

She was good at keeping secrets. She could tell you how many times ‘it’ was done in her backseat. But she won’t. She kept all their secrets. Including that which taunted Dean every time he poked at Sam about doing ‘it’.

“You know I could tease you about this being kiss and makeup sex.”

“Only because you like to make me blush.”

“I always said you needed to man up your ears, Sammy.”

She heard a satisfied hum. That she hadn’t heard in a long time. It meant that Sam was happy and when he was, it usually was because Angela was. Or the other way around. She let out a satisfied sigh.

“I miss that.”

There was a hum and a slight shift. It was followed by her hearing Sam ask, “What’s wrong?”

“I miss teasing you. Too much thinking about other things. I think I’m turning into you.”

“Never.”

“What makes you think so?”

“Because I’m a selfish bastard and you’re not.”

It was odd for her to hear but she continued to listen. She knew that they were not like how Dean talked to his lady friends and definitely not when his special witch friend came by. She could recall the last time she came and what happened there.

“You’re not selfish. Only human.”

There was some more shuffling and Sam asking, “What’s bothering you Angie? Did you have the dream again?”

She heard a slight whimper. It was followed something whispered. She couldn’t exactly hear but she heard the comfort being sought and given. She head Sam murmuring at Angela in soothing tones. Then she heard, “It scares me Sam. And I don’t know what to do.”

“I don’t know either. But I’m here for you. I want to help you.”

“Even though she wants to kill you?”

“I’ve had threats before and so have you.”

“But it is different. It _feels_ different.” There was a sigh. “Way to kill the mood.”

Sam hummed a bit before saying, “I’m not saying I’m worried. I am and it kills me that you feel this way. I just got you back and then… this.”

“I guess we just have to muddle through like always.”

It was quiet for a time. She was certain that they had gone to sleep. It wouldn’t be the first time. She let out another comfortable sigh.

“I’m with you Angie no matter what.”

“Always and forever?”

“Always.”

“I love you.”

She had heard that before. It was a promise. Apart from secrets, she held promises. What that phrase was used it was a promise. She was relieved when they shifted and drifted off to sleep. It was certainly interesting when Dean came back and found them in the backseat. From there, they enjoyed lighthearted banter and it seemed that all traces of the conversation the night before was gone.

But she knew what was said. While it may be forgotten or never mentioned again in the future, she had the memory of it. She would never forget. She witnessed their moments and she kept them. She kept their secrets. She knew their hopes and fears. She even knew things that they didn’t know just yet. It was what she did. She was the needed listener and it was a job she gladly kept.


	5. 11.05 Hatchet of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angie thinks about what happened to Len and Sam gives her a bit of encouragement for the upcoming meeting with Amara aka Darkness. Tag to Thin Lizzie.

_What kind of person can murder and feel nothing?_

Angela leaned against the Impala as she looked up at the sky. It had been a long time since she done any star gazing. She used to do it as a means to unwind and think about what happened on the job and other things. Then it was a means to think about her life in general and the choices she made whether it was person or the job.

This last one was a bit of an eye opener. Darkness or better yet known as Amara was in town and she had been sucking out people’s souls. The idea that Lizzie Borden’s ghost was doing the killings turned out to be a bust and she was aware of slight disappointment on Sam’s end much to Dean’s amusement. It changed since Amara was brought into the picture.

She sensed it before Len told them what happened to him. Ever since she had been ‘cured’ of her Purgatory problem it has been like the muzzle was taken off. True she had been able to do what she had been doing but it was sluggish. Now, it was high definition and really mind shattering at times. So when she first saw Len, she knew that he didn’t have a soul.

_There is no sensitive way to tell somebody their soul has been sucked out by a prehistoric tween._

Sam was right in that respect. There was no way to tell someone that they lost their soul and could no longer feel everything they were used to feeling. All the joy was sucked out of it. You didn’t feel anything but just executed what you intended to do. She knew of armies that wanted operatives like that because emotions and morals were dangerous.

That was hard explaining it to Len about what happened to him. Sam did the best he could and she backed him up on it. She even backed him up about not killing him because he hadn’t done anything. In her mind, killing someone for something that they haven’t done or might to… it wasn’t right. The final solution with regards to Len… she didn’t like it but…

_I can feel it. It’s like a little light._

She didn’t know what she did. Half the time she didn’t really know at the time she did the act. Later she did after analyzing it. That just seemed to be the way with her abilities, in particular the ones tied to her healing. And it had her baffled at times.

Dean gave her the look but seemed accepting of it. Angela just looked at Len and touched him when she tapped into her abilities and her hand started to glow. Len was calm about it and that was because of the whole soulless thing. He merely looked at her and she touched certain pointed on his body, namely his head and chest.

When she was done, she sat there and looked at Len with an inquisitive look. It was Len who got excited because he could feel something. It had Dean asking her what she did but couldn’t really answer at the time. Len though said, “Now I can do this. I won’t be able to hurt anyone if I turn myself in but now I have something that I thought was lost.”

He looked at her with a smile. It had her baffled a bit since she didn’t exactly know what she did. The best she could come up with at the time was that she healed something. That was the only reason her powers would kick in. She was a healer and there was no changing that.

It wasn’t acceptable that he was going to prison for the crimes he didn’t commit but he did kill the soulless babysitter. That was the hard part with morality. It put you between a rock and a hard place. You ended up questioning if you did everything right. Questioning whether or not you acted for the greater good.

_And this is why you and Mac and others like you do this job. It’s so others don’t._

Angela was certain that Len was going to be okay. She did sense that she left something behind in the man as if to temper the darkness budding in him. It wasn’t her soul since that was stupid to do and she already belonged to another. She considered the idea that she did was Death had done for Sam and that was build a wall. Thinking about it was the more plausible and made more sense. It certainly made more sense than the things she had been witnessing lately.

Sighing, she propped herself against the Impala and looked up at the sky. She allowed her thoughts to wander but they were still centered on recent events. Her main concern was the fact that Amara was on the move. That she was Darkness was all the more clear now. What that implied was a larger picture that she had yet to understand.

_You’ve crossed a line to dance with me._

Those words, next to the implied threat to Sam haunted her the most. Angela knew when she crossed a line more or less. She knew the implications behind her actions and some choices she had made… This though was different. What Darkness implied was something that had to do with the fact that there was the possibility that they had met before and in a time that was beyond all reckoning, as the phrase went.

She knew she had taken a gamble and that was when she and Sam were trying to heal Dean. It had been Sam’s idea to use sanctified blood. After all it worked on Crowley and turned him into a girly addict. That had been disturbing in of itself. But for Dean…

She didn’t want to tell Sam that she had doubts about it being a long term solution. Even if they cured the demon in him, there was still the Mark to contend with and she had always been wary of it ever since she saw it on Dean’s arm. When she would look at it, she heard whispers in her head. Kind of like what she heard in that dream when they got Castiel back.

It was her initiative to use her blood in the mixture. She had taken precautions though and had a priest sanctify it. It almost sounded blasphemous but like anything being introduced to the human body, you had to take into account infection and rejection. She wanted to reduce the odds of rejection. Then she spiked the blood Sam prepared. She made sure that she handed him the syringes.

The gamble was that she would be able to monitor Dean’s condition as well as temper the effects of the Mark. It was a rollercoaster in the end since some days were better than most and it didn’t help that she hadn’t been cured from Purgatory at the time. Of course Sam found out what she did and it…

Maybe she had crossed a line but it was for the people she loved. She had done it before and would do it again. One just had to point at Augusta, Suriyel, Ellen, Jo… countless others she had known over the centuries. Yeah she would put herself on the line for anyone but few people she would go to hell and back for time and time again. She would ‘hurt’ herself for them because she loved them and…

“Hey.”

Angela looked to see the one person that made her happy walking towards her. She gave a smile, “Hey yourself.”

Sam looked at her, still not believing that she was freed from whatever it was that happened in Purgatory. She looked… “I guess I walked into that one.”

“It’s one of your more endearing qualities,” Angela replied as she adjusted her position. She sighed and added, “Checking up on me again?”

“Guilty as charged,” Sam admitted. He looked at the ground slightly and added, “How are you feeling?”

“Better… been better,” she replied. She knew why he was asking. “I haven’t had the nightmare. And I can feel things like I used to before Purgatory.” She shifted her feet to rest her heel on her toe. It made for an impossible balancing act but she had done it before.

“That’s good. I’m glad.”

The conversation sounded stilted and while they had made up in the past… Angela looked at Sam and asked, “What’s wrong?”

“I’m worried. About Dean… you. And that my worst nightmare will come true.” Sam approached her until he was about leaned on the car next to her. He looked at her. “Worried about Amara and… what you’ve told me.”

Angela tapped her heel on her toe. She nodded, “I think about that too. Mostly whether or not it is true. I mean we both know that all three of us have had a previous life so it’s possible but I have no memory what I learned and that is the sticking point and scary one. That and we really don’t know what we are dealing with.”

“Isn’t that always the case?”

Angela shot Sam a look but understood what he was doing. “And we’ve always found lore in some form or another. This… is different. And… it brings questions that I’m not sure I want the answers to… About me and my role.”

Sam adjusted his position so he could pull her towards him without having to move much. “So… what do you want to do?”

Angela couldn’t help but give a small smile and a smirk. Their roles have reversed several times over. That’s what it meant to be true partners, husband and wife; to be there when the other needed it and sometimes when it wasn’t wanted. “Well first figure out what it was I did to help Len. I have a theory but it still sounds ridiculous.”

“Dean said it was your healer mojo.”

“Yes… but I am not sure what it was. The best I could come up with is a wall. Like what Death did for you but around the black hole where Len’s soul was.”

Sam thought about it for a moment. He then nodded, “That works.” He had an idea too but it sounded cheesy and at times it made her laugh but not at him. It made her thoughtful even if it sounded sappy or ridiculous. “But I think it’s something else.”

“Really?” Angela eyes him with a raised brow. Her eyes got that mischievous twinkle in them as if to present a challenge.

Sam noticed it and inwardly was glad. It was one more sign that she was being her usual self. She had been before but it was different. With the taint of Purgatory gone, it was like a weight was lifted off her shoulders. He looked at her and replied, “Yeah.”

“What then?”

“Hope.”

Angela blinked at that. It was a little unusual for Sam to be that profound with the touchy feely. “Hope?”

“You have no idea how much of it you give when you help people out. I’ve seen it and it comes from your heart like everything else. It’s the best thing about you.” Sam looked at her in the eye and straightened up. “You give it freely even when most would say it has no business being there. It was what I remember most from the Cage.”

Angela didn’t say anything but accepted the kiss that Sam gave her cheek. She took in a deep breath when he kissed her a second time on the neck where her mark was and heard him whisper that he loved her and was heading back in. She watched him leave and thought about what he said. She smiled when he turned back and signed something at her and it made her choke out a giggle and she gave her reply in sign.

Looking back up she thought about what Sam said. She had voiced her fears to him and she knew his. It was the nature of this job. And yet, they were comforted by the fact that they weren’t alone. It made all the difference. However, what he said about her… it had her thinking. She thought about the way Len looked at her when he realized that he could feel a little bit of something. The way that he thanked her…

_I know you can’t return my soul but still… what you did… I can live with it now. I know that you’ll find Amara and do what you have to do. Thank you._

She had always fought against those that threatened humanity. She had done it since she had trained under her father and then later when she was alone. She accepted her responsibility of being the Malachi even though it seemed that it was predetermined that she was the one. She stood up for humans against Lucifer and she always considered the collateral damage that could occur with her choices. Some said to the point of lunacy but that was how she was.

_You always were one to protect the innocent. It was why He created you, but he didn’t expect your twin to develop._

There was a reason that Amara chose to target her the way she did and Angela knew that it was going to be a fight that was going to get down and dirty. She had her reasons to keep on fighting. Even when she nearly died before meeting the Winchesters she always fought to live. It wasn’t really just a desire to live though it could be argued that.

_It was why He created you…_

_The light for others when all others go out…_

Angela looked up at the sky and nodded as she thought about everything that happened and what Sam had said. It wasn’t a perfect solution but then again things rarely were. Maybe she would never find out the truth between her and Amara but she knew that what was here was important. The Darkness was coming and she would be there to stand against the tide that would come. Her weapon was like a hatchet against a great grizzly and she once had done that but it left a nice sting. Maybe Sam was right and what she gave Len was hope.


	6. 11.06 Army of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darkness is coming and everyone knows it. The gods band together to bring back the Army of the Light but who is to lead? Looks like Kesset has some convincing to do both to the gods and the one person he is certain can lead. Tag to Our Little World.

A place of refuge and safety… the very core of a sanctuary. It was a place where beings who just wanted to live in peace could live and not be troubled by the very things that led to the sanctuaries being created in the first place. For centuries they had stood against those that insisted upon causing chaos and destruction. Kesset, Captain of the Royal Guard, knew this as he paced through the halls of the main fortress.

Though it was never spoken, the Guard was always on alert for anything and everything. They were one of many protectors; one of many armies that stood against the other side. Their mission was to fight and protect. Kesset had grown up with that and lived it with every fiber of his being and channeled that into the new recruits. The results he could see training in the main yard and he gave his wings a slight shuffle of approval as he continued his walk.

Before he would have hidden his wings. They were considered the markings of disgrace, distrust awe and fear. After what happened in the wars that nearly destroyed his kind and then his father… it had been a hard road. But it changed and it was because of her. Kesset increased his step as he crossed through the compound to where he had been summoned. Whenever he thought of her, his heart quickened in joy and thankfulness.

She had convinced him to be proud of who he was. She stood up for his father and for him against all comers. She was his charge even though he had been promoted to his position. He would protect her if ever she called for him or if it were serious enough for he knew that her mate would watch out for her and with the ferociousness of his people. He felt privileged to know them.

He entered the main hall and wasn’t surprised to see those of the warrior nobility there. It was a matter for all involved in the first place. He recognized Ares, Thor… warrior gods and demigods gathered along with the council of elder gods. He could see the Lady Isis along with Amaterasu, Quetzalcoatl and the guardians of the council. It was a serious business.

“I tell you, I’ve had five of my best return to me soulless,” Ares pointed out, looking agitated.

“Really? I would have thought you’d be glad for that,” a demigod pointed out looking smug at the assertions.

“Not when they start killing their own men for no reason!”

“But isn’t that the way of your warriors? You seem content sowing it in others Ares.”

“And I as soon as have your head…”

Kesset moved in to report to Hapi and Satet who were also in attendance. Things weren’t looking too well with this council at all. He looked at the warrior gods and goddesses as they started throwing insults back and forth. It wasn’t until a gavel was banged that the noise died down and Quetzalcoatl spoke, “We do have a situation and one that at least the gods have known about since the beginning. The Darkness has once again been released upon the world.”

“And it was those bloody Winchesters!”

There was grumbling and Kesset ruffled his wings, ready to stand up. He still had his duty as a guardian to the very people he had been asked and chosen to protect. He would not tolerate threats or actions against them.

“Silence,” Quetzalcoatl called out, “It is true that the rumors that the Winchesters were in the vicinity of Darkness being released but there is no proof. That aside we have the issue of what has been happening with our various pantheons and followers.”

“She has little to no regard for us.”

The council looked at the gathered warrior gods. This was only the first part of it. They knew that it wasn’t going to stop there. Quetzalcoatl nodded and continued, “Which is why we are addressing this now. It is clear that we will need a force to stand against her as we have those under our protection that we have sworn to protect.”

“I say…” Ares began with a sneer of annoyance, “That you give me leave to hunter her down.”

“The assassins are better than thugs.”

Kesset looked at the scene. The arguments were getting to be louder and terrible. They needed a voice of reason. He looked down at the table he was sitting at and noticed the book. He had brought it with him after it had been handed to him by one of his aides. He had taken it with him since he was on the way, intending to look at it later. While they were arguing, he opened it and began to read until he came up with the answer.

_Can it be so simple?_

Kesset read what he had and looked at the squabbling members. They needed a solution and he had one. But it was… very bold. He looked at Hapi and Satet and they gave their silent approval, always seeming to know when he had something to say. He figured it was a godhood thing.

Standing up he said, “Unity is our weapon.”

It caught Isis’ attention and she held up her hand for silence and looked at him and asked, “What is it you said, Captain of the Guard?”

Kesset stood up and went towards the council with the book in hand. “Unity is our weapon. Without it we are scattered and free for Darkness to pick off one by one. We need to unite under one banner.” He held up the book he had and added, “I propose that the Army of Light be reborn.”

There was a rumble everywhere. Some were protesting and others were just grumbling. Quetzalcoatl held up his hand and looked at the Avian, “You propose a radical solution and one that hasn’t been used in millennia. What makes you think that it will work, Captain?”

Kesset looked at the elder god and replied, “We are united under one banner. As far as we know, Darkness is a formidable foe. It is noted that only by working together were we able to achieve the victory we did so long ago.”

“And that was with the Six led by One at its head,” Ares pointed out. “Who is going to lead this Army of Light? You? An Avian?”

“I’d rather skin myself than be under the command of an Avian!”

More grumbling and shouting came. Kesset knew that there were hard feelings still from the wars with the Avians and such. He took a breath and replied, nearly shouting but his shifting wings were able to amplify his voice, “There is only one person who can unite us all.”

“Pray tell who,” Ares countered with an annoyed expression as he crossed his arms over his chest.

Kesset looked at the god boldly in the eye and replied, “The only one to have stood against Lucifer, the Mother of All, Leviathans, Purgatory and the insurrection of the celestials. The one who can call others together in times of despair, the harbinger of hope and light…” He looked at the others and finished, “The warrior princess, the daughter of the warrior royalty.” He was using the titles and names she was known by. It was how they were able to recognize her. “She goes by many names but we know her as the Malachi of Absolution.”

There was some silence and Ares gave a grudging nod of approval at Kesset. He looked at the council and said calmly, “I agree. The warrior princess is the correct choice.”

“You’d say that no matter what. You’re still trying to court her even though she’s already been spoken for.”

It was meant to taunt but Ares wasn’t going to take the bait. He knew that he had tried and lost. He had already lost when he started getting more involved within the last five years. He mostly did it to amuse himself. He ignored them and looked at the council and spoke as if he didn’t hear a word, “The Malachi is the best choice. I mean who here among us can say otherwise about her work? Even with the setbacks?”

A silence settled over the room as each tried to think about it. They had heard the stories and some were directly involved with her… They really couldn’t say much except those that housed a deep seated grudge. Quetzalcoatl looked at Isis and knew her response but he had to make sure about the others. He looked at Kesset and replied, “It is true that the Malachi has done many things and some of these setbacks had consequences. What makes you think that she would be able to lead the Army of the Light if it were to be reborn?”

Kesset knew from his personal experience but he knew that it wasn’t going to be enough. He opened his mouth and was going to say something when he was interrupted by. “I believe I can help with that.”

All eyes turned to see a woman standing with a man that looked intimidated and broken. Kesset blinked having recognized her as an angel. Quetzalcoatl asked, “And who are you celestial being?”

“Amitiel, the Archangel of Truth,” Amitiel replied as she held fast to her charge. “I have here some information that might be of help as to why our earthbound sister is the most qualified.” She gestured towards her charge and motioned for him to speak.

Kesset recognized him as Metatron, the Scribe of God, having met him when he had tried tracking down the angel that kidnapped his charge. It had been difficult because the angel was wearing Sam as a vessel. He felt a slight bit of anger towards that being and his wings shifted in slight agitation. It was a warning not to try anything.

“The Malachi… is not just the earthborn angel. She is _the_ angel created by God to fight against the Darkness,” Metatron spoke looking very intimidated by all the powerful beings gathered in one place.

There was a murmur but Kesset took control and approached the Scribe, “What do you mean she was created by God?”

Metatron looked at Kesset with annoyance even though there was some fear in his eyes. “As I said. She was created. She was an angel first. The most powerful of the archangels. It’s why she can stand up to them and kick them in the ass.”

“Explain fully,” Isis said with kindness in her voice.

“In order for God to create… he had to betray his sister, Darkness,” Metatron replied, telling the same story he told Castiel and then Amitiel when she found him telling the story of the Malachi as the Light to fight Darkness. “Darkness doesn’t care about creation. So God created a being of compassion and love, the embodiment of light… her. She was the one who imprisoned Darkness in the Mark but only after a vicious battle that… too horrible to contemplate.”

“So why is the Malachi living among the mortals?”

“Because God placed her there. For peace, protection… and because she asked for it.” Metatron shrugged since he wasn’t sure. “All I know is that she doesn’t remember that but her powers are intact.”

Isis looked at her fellow elder gods and they nodded. They summoned out the Seer and he stood in the center. He looked at the others and sighed before casting the vision pool. In it appeared what looked like an open field and the Malachi was facing Darkness. Darkness was saying, “You are as I remember…”

It flashed forward to a room where the Malachi was standing there next to Dean Winchester. Her eyes were flaring as she held her hand like she was going to raise it and strike. It was snapping and crackling with power. Her eyes were flaring and her teeth were elongated. Her gaze was fixated on the woman with blue eyes and it was like she knew her. The old soul look was apparent in both their faces. Then the vision is gone.

There was a murmur. It was hard for the others to digest that their warrior princess was once a celestial being. Most couldn’t believe it since she had never exhibited such things before and it was a bit alarming. One asked, “If that is the case, how is it that we sense her as a mortal? You celestials stick out like a sore thumb! There is no sign that she is one… unless you have deceived us once again!” It came out like a growl.

Metatron looked at Amitiel. He then looked at the crowd and said, “Because she has no grace. It was taken from her when she chose to live here on the mortal plane. God didn’t want her to remember her battle as a kindness.”

Kesset watched as the gathering discussed things. He noticed that there were divisions. Most were distrustful of the angels now with everything going on. They only liked a few because they kept their word and they were too damn scary to mess with. Amitiel was one and she was the Archangel of Truth.

_What would you do now, Shifaa’?_

Thinking for a moment, Kesset knew then what he had to do. He stepped in front and said, “This changes nothing. Only that a longtime friend and ally has a past that may help us in the end. The Malachi of Absolution is what she is to not only us but the very people we oversee. How many of those she had saved, loved, protected, given hope to? It matters not that she was once one of the celestials and if she were given the grace of one, she would still say she is with the people.”

“Well I know for sure she’d still tell me to fuck off,” Ares allowed with a grin, relishing the last time she told him to go screw himself.

“Exactly,” Kesset pointed out. He paced in front of the gathered gods in the area that separated them from the council. “The princess does not hold herself higher than others. If anything she will find a way to prove she isn’t worthy but in the end she will do it and not for glory or anything like that… but for the very people that she swore to protect.”

“How do you know she won’t give preferential treatment?”

Kesset knew that was a question directed at the fact that it was no secret that she protected the Winchesters with a vengeance. Few knew that Sam was her chosen, and very approved of, mate. He replied, “She has gone to hell and back, to Purgatory and to heaven… faced personal hells from various beings. She has volunteered to take the place of total strangers. What more can you ask?”

It was a good question and it seemed to mollify most of them. Finally an agreement was reached even though it wasn’t completely voiced. Quetzalcoatl nodded, “Then let it be known that we will unite under one banner to combat Darkness.”

“And how will we get the Malachi to agree?”

It was a good question. Everyone knew that the decisions made here would affect how things were done. And it didn’t help that the person in question wasn’t present. Kesset sighed and looked at Hapi and Satet. They looked at him and gave a nod and he nodded in return. He looked at the others and said, “I will go to Malachi and ask.”

“Ask? You need a boulder to the head to convince her.”

“I will ask,” Kesset repeated as he looked at the demigod that said that. “If anything it is the most courteous thing ever done to her and you will find she is more receptive to it.”

There were murmurs of agreement. They knew that well. Kesset nodded and turned towards the council, “Elder gods, I volunteer to speak to the Malachi on our behalf. If she knows that she is not alone in this, she will be open to it.” He stood tall, determined to carry out his duty.

Quetzalcoatl nodded after looking to the others. This was a difficult thing to ask but they needed the one person known for bringing hope, and was a light when others were gone. “Very well, Captain. Speak with the Malachi. Explain the situation and we understand if she does not wish to be involved. But from this moment on, as we fight against Darkness, we stand together. From this moment, we, the elder gods declare the Army of the Light reborn.”

It was done. Kesset took a breath and looked at Amitiel and Hapi and Satet; they knew he was faced with a challenge. He knew it would be difficult since his charge, the princess, was inclined to take burdens on herself. And yet she would accept help if approached in the right manner.

“I wish you luck, Avian,” Ares said as he put an arm around Kesset’s shoulders. He gave a grin as he added, “Cause you’ve got a monumental task ahead of you. I mean the last time I tried to talk to her… not good but memorable. Oh by the way, tell her that I said hi.”

Kesset made a slight face at that. He knew what the stakes were. He went to bade farewell to the lord and lady. He had one more stop to make before he went on his mission. He was there quicker than he had ever been with the exception of racing to protect a charge. He entered the dwelling that had been his since he was made captain.

“You’re on another mission.”

Kesset turned to face the woman that his charge had introduced him to. “Yes. I wanted to see you and Ayana before I went.”

Kate looked at Kesset. She knew he was devoted to family and duty and often the two blurred so it was never a clear distinction. It was why she loved him and was willing to leave her life behind to live in the sanctuary. Plus also it was a bit safer when their daughter was born but Kesset was agreeable to going back to the real world as she called it. She smiled at him and smoothed out one of his wing feathers. “She’s getting ready for a nap.”

Kesset gave a smile before heading towards the room that housed the nest where his daughter slept. She was peering out at the world with big round eyes. Her set of wings moved in joy when she saw him and she reached out for her father. She squawked out, “Pa.”

Kesset chuckled as he picked up his daughter and held her in the way Avian newborns liked to be held. He took care to tuck her little wings close to her body to act like an insulator and murmured, “I have to go Ayana. Someone needs my help.”

The baby looked up at him and reached up and tugged on the necklace that had the amulet he carried for the last four or so years. He murmured, “Yes. It’s her. The one who made sure you were safe.”

The baby cooed some more and Kesset said his goodbyes before saying good bye to Kate. He reminded her that Matthias, his second, would be around if she needed anything. He took off leaving his family in the safety of Karnak. As he made his way to the bunker, he hoped that he would be able to convince her to be what they needed. There was a lot at stake and he had the hope that she would be able to make things right.


	7. 11.07 Even A Light Needs a Hero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angie is a protector. She protects those that can't do it themselves or teaches them how. She is the earth bound angel and protector of all. But who protects the protector? Tag to Plush.

The ride back to the bunker was silent after that conversation. It wasn’t the companionable silence that usually happened. No, it was that near uncomfortable silence after hearing the worst possible things ever. And it occurred only because it was she was asleep. She pretended to be asleep but she heard every single word.

Angela lounged in the backseat of the Impala while Dean drove on and studied the backs of the boys’ heads. This last job had them thinking about and facing their worst fears despite the fact that it had to do with a vengeful spirit. Her thoughts were not on her own fears but those of Sam’s. It hadn’t been an easy time for him since his vision of the Cage and then being stuck in an elevator with a clown… Her heart went out to him as she pushed aside her own fear and they were related in a way.

She made the choice then and there to follow Sam into the Cage. She was determined to save him then and still was. He was her world. And it was the one thing that she could and did accuse herself of being selfish about. She forsook her role as a protector to go and save him. No one accused her of being selfish. Rather those that knew her said she did the right thing. It was different from the good of the whole logic she used. And she had no regrets.

She also knew what it was like in the Cage. She had spent a year and an half in there evading direct torture, suffering direct torture both mental and physical and watching others suffer through it. Michael and Lucifer had no qualms about dealing out the pain. And her being the stubborn fool, she fought back.

She defended Sam and Adam when they came after them. She jumped in front to take the licks and dished it right back. She could remember what she had done. It was like the epic battles told in the old poems and stories like Odysseus and _The Iliad_. Nothing romantic in terms of the language but it was more like those old battles that high school students read and scoffed at because it involved the gods and goddesses. Little did they know how true it was on some level.

She knew Sam was scared. It didn’t take a genius to figure it out. Dean knew that too. They had all been to hell, literally, and back. They knew what it was like and she could understand why Dean said to not poke the bear with Sam’s vision. But she knew Sam too. She could feel his anxiety and it was potent. Much more now that she had been cured from her time in Purgatory. The weight had been taken off her shoulders and now she was feeling everything and it was magnified and to the point that it was like when she first discovered how overly sensitive her olfactory system was.

_You’re only as useful as needed to play your role in this. But if you live… it will never truly leave you._

Lucifer had said that to her when she had the unfortunate sense to be captured and restrained. He was going to play with her and he was making an exhausted Sam watch. The devil was warning her that she could fight but even if she got free, she would never be truly free of it. That was the one difference between him and Michael. Lucifer told the truth about what was going on. Michael preferred to gripe and punish. Funny how the ‘evil’ one was supposed to be the prince of lies but he held more truth in his words than a fricking angel.

The truth was… there were shades of grey. She knew that very well. The truth could be twisted into a lie and hell she had done it so many times. How many times had she lied even though the cover was as close to the truth as possible? Even Dean said she was capable of making a lie sound true. She was no better but in a twisted way, she was always honest about the situation that they were facing. She told it straight.

_There are things my pretty that you don’t know about but you are a part of. Old things… ancient things…_

Lucifer told that to her during one session. It was more like a ‘therapy’ session. They were just talking. She was trying to figure out a way of getting out of it while carrying on a conversation with the devil. He decided to just talk to her before getting down to his normal business. It was something he did before he started in on her. It was almost normal and that was the most torturous of all.

_You imprisoned me…_

_You are a part of. Old things… ancient things…_

Her last confrontation with Darkness reminded her of her conversations with Lucifer. It had her wondering if he was warning her or leaving something to torture her with. In a way he knew what was going on since Darkness was imprisoned in the Mark and it had been placed upon Lucifer. If that was the case and if, and that was a big if, what Darkness said was true, then Lucifer knew it was her that basically caused him to fall.

He would have more than ample reason to torture her and even kill her. She made him into what he was. And yet, he never really did hurt her. When they were ankle deep in the Apocalypse, he never raised a blow against her. He always looked at her and spoke to her. He didn’t like it when she interfered with his bonding moment with Sam but even then, when he was in Sam’s body, he never really tried to hurt her. It had her baffled.

_I could never hurt you my pretty. You are special and beautiful and so much more. If only you knew…_

He was sad when he said that. She couldn’t understand it and didn’t understand it now. She would get it if he had resentment since he was stuck in a Cage and she lived her life topside as a mortal being reincarnated. This she didn’t, which was why she didn’t try to bring it up with Sam but instead took to being the comfort he needed even when he didn’t voice it. She was compelled to and wanted to help her mate after everything he had done for her.

_You’ve done the one thing that I wanted for you and that was to do something for yourself… I’m the selfish bastard…_

Sam told her that and she knew it wasn’t true. It broke her heart that he was ever told that and especially when he voiced that he didn’t want to be a hunter. As far as she was concerned, Sam was doing what he was and that was being human. He wanted to be something other than what he had known and in her mind that was fine. It was his life and if anything he should be making choices.

Oh she knew that John and Dean had reacted the only way they knew how and that was because they loved Sam. She understood that. But she understood Sam’s need to be his own person. Did John and Dean really know how lonely Sam was when he was at Stanford? Did they really know that he would look at the phone as if it would make a call from them come through?

She saw how Sam beat himself up over being a failure for doing the same shit that she or Dean would do. Theirs was called noble and his was called the colossal fuck up. And he knew it and voiced it. And he carried it with him and suffered in silence on his quest to ‘make it up to her’. And he once asked her why after all that would she still want to be with him and listed all of his perceived fuck ups including his relationship with Amelia.

_You’re not selfish. Only human._

That was the truth. She managed to justify just about everything Sam listed to her as to why she should leave him. The whole thing with Amelia… it hurt yes but in the end, that woman saved Sam from a bottomless pit he would have fallen into. And she talked to the woman and it wasn’t anything sexual at all. It was Sam that refused to take it further than being friends and it surprised her that he wouldn’t say anything about it.

_Just thinking about you being there… alone…_

It had been scary and lonely in Purgatory. She was in a fight for her life and to get free. There were plenty of times that she wanted to give up but she refused to. It was because of Sam; the fact that he was there on the other side waiting, worrying and hoping she would come back… that’s what kept her going. He gave her hope that she would make it out alive and back to him.

_There is one thing that is constant for beings like you and me my pretty… It’s that we are always alone. No matter what you do… You are alone._

_Always and forever… I have one lifetime with you and I aim to take what I can get…_

She used to believe that she was alone. It was all she had since her father died. Even though Gabriel was in her life, she always felt alone; that there was no one for her. It was something she learned to ignore over the centuries because every time she thought she found someone, it turned out not to be the one she was looking for. In the end, she just drifted along saving people and hunting things, fully accepting that it was her fate.

Then Sam came into her life. It was supposed to be a temporary thing but it ended up being something more. True it was Dean that asked her to join but it was Sam that put the idea in play. It was Sam that convinced her to open more about herself even though she nearly sabotaged it several times over. Yet he still was persistent. No matter what she did, even with her agreement of keeping Gadreel’s presence a secret, he came back to her. It baffled her because she knew it was horrible and worthy of rejection. Hell, she was prepared for it. But it never came.

She looked up at the front seat and tapped into her empath abilities to be reassuring since she sensed Sam’s concerns and worries. It surprised her when he pushed back. So she backed away. It hurt but it was replaced by warmth. It flooded her system like she was getting a transfusion or something. It was warm, gentle… everything like when they first slept together. She remembered that as she blinked and pondered what was going on at that moment.

Sam shifted in the front and she glanced up but didn’t move to find that he was looking at her. She was pretending to be asleep and because of that stunt she pulled, he was trying to see if she really was. He knew her pretty well; he always had. She watched as he looked at her, the worry evident on his face but it softened as he continued to look at her. She then felt that warmth flood her gently. It was like a cocoon, enveloping her.

_Where did he learn that?_

It was on her thoughts as the warmth lulled her to sleep. She fought but it came and the last thing she heard was him whispering in her mind, _It’ll be okay, Angie._

She wanted to believe that. And she did. She was determined to find a way about this whole business. But she couldn’t help but think about what Darkness said about her twin. And she knew deep down it was true. Sam would defend her to the death and he nearly died for her. That was what scared her because deep down she felt that Darkness would be right; that she would come through with her promise that she made in that field.

_Always and forever…_

The warmth came again and she found herself shielded and protected. She really needed to find out how Sam could do that. But right now sleep sounded good. Besides she felt the one thing that always felt right. She was safe. He kept her safe.


	8. 11.08 Friend of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam is still thinking about going to the Cage and what it might mean and has an interesting conversation with an 'old friend' of sorts. Tag to Just My Imagination.

_Sometimes they’re scared. But that just means the thing that they’re facing, it’s super important and nobody else is gonna go for it because nobody else has got the balls._

Thinking about it, Sam knew that Sully was right. This thing with his vision… deep down he knew that he had to go back to the Cage. He had to confront Lucifer if he was going to fix this problem that he caused. Yet it wasn’t so much as him being scared of going back, and he was terrified of it. No, the fear was because she would come whether it was for her or not.

He remembered what she went through in the Cage. It was as clear as when they were actually there and he saw it. He was concerned about Lucifer; he remembered that the devil would take her aside, out of sight and when she came back… He was scared, not just for himself but for her. He couldn’t lose her but he couldn’t tell her not to be herself.

Sam sighed as he ran a hand through his locks as he thought about things. They were back at the bunker after helping his childhood invisible friend Sully. The job had given him a lot to think about and he was glad that they didn’t have to take drastic measures with Reece. He recalled Sully hugging the girl and then her wrapping the both of them in a hug. It was not something he was used to seeing but figured it was her ability to sense things on overdrive and she was still working it out but he knew there was more to it.

“She has a big heart doesn’t she?”

Sam pivoted and on alert since it wasn’t Dean’s voice. Seeing no one at eye level, he looked around. Who…?

“Down here.”

Sam looked down and blinked as he saw the Xana that looked exactly like the bear Dean had gotten her when she had been shrunk. He knew he shouldn’t have been surprised when he walked in the kitchen that morning to see her going about the morning routine like it was nothing and the way she talked with Sully… Then finding out she had… Samadean with her…

Samadean looked up at Sam and his bear brow rose up and he said, “I would have thought you’d be used to me after everything.”

Sam knew the Xana was right. “I know. I thought… I thought you’d have moved on with Sully.”

Samadean looked down and shuffled on his bear feet with his arms crossed behind him. “Yeah but… I figured that I’d stick around for a little bit. Angie was my first kid and I got a soft spot for her. And you.”

Sam decided to bite even though it was the strangest thing ever, “Why is that? You… manifested when Angie was regressed.”

“But not until Dean told her that I came to life,” Samadean pointed out. “For the most part I was the bear and well I think Sully explained it enough don’t you think?”

Sam looked down at the bear that came up to just above his knee, maybe mid-thigh. Sully had explained it as best as he could and it did make sense. It only confirmed what Sam knew all along about his mate; that she did have a loving heart and it was a gift that it hadn’t been tarnished beyond repair with everything that had happened. “Yeah. I just don’t understand why you would…” He made a face and gestured around.

“I’m fond of you because of her. I can see why she loves you; the pure faith she had… still has in you.” Samadean was pacing on the floor as he gestured at Sam. “Talking about Dean made her smile but talking about you… little bunch of sunshine.”

It was nothing new to hear people comment on Angela’s feelings for him but they were always when she was an adult. When she was _that_ size… Sam thought he knew the score but here he had a direct source to a time that he did enjoy but even then was plagued with uncertainty on his end. He looked at the pint sized Xana as he walked around the library and started fixing books, cataloguing them. “What did you talk about?”

“Lots of things. Mostly extolling yours and Dean’s virtues and then when she was sad she couldn’t go with you. Kept saying that it was what you were supposed to do,” Samadean replied as he finished fixing the shelf. “There. You’ll feel about it in the morning and less heckling from Sherlock.”

Sam made a slight face at that as he was reminded to keep his voice down since the Librarian practically lived in the library. And it reminded him that the man could pretty much overhear any conversation they had there. That meant the whole thing when Sully arrived. “Thanks… Samadean,” he offered.

Samadean looked at Sam and managed a grin, “Oh it’s no problem. I like neat and tidy though I do have a system with my laundry.”

The comment has Sam chuckle a bit and a small smile appeared on his face. It sobered and he asked, “So why are you sticking around?”

“Simple reason, because I’m still needed. More complex one, because I’m needed.” The bear turned to look at Sam and he studied the man. “If there is one thing I know for certain about Angie, it’s because of her fear… and yours.”

“And mine?”

“Her fear of losing you both and being alone. Similar to yours… apart from going back to the Cage,” the Xana replied in a matter of fact tone. “That and she’s scared about the Darkness… what it will mean.”

“And that’s something I want to avoid.”

“If what you know is true…” The bear shrugged his shoulders as he said it. “A person has to confront it. You know that better than anyone that you can’t always run away from the scary thing. Sully put it better than I could.”

Sam looked at Samadean, “How… how do you know that about me?”

Samadean shuffled on his feet a bit before replying, “I was created out of the love Angie has, love of life… everything. But it’s from her and knowing her, I got a glimpse of you. I talked to Sully and he explained to me all about it. It is a beautiful thing to be… bonded that way. True souls… Did you know that I met one other like you two? And then those who meet their soulmates at a young age…”

“So you can… read souls?” Sam had no idea how to put it. He was also a bit wary since he and Angela were careful about the whole true soul thing. After everything it was the right thing since they were rare and the fact that they encountered really nasty monsters out there…

“Like I said, Angie created me with her natural love for everything but mostly for life and its tied to her feelings about you. It’s a part of her and I carry it and can see what she sees.” Samadean shrugged again. “At least that’s how I think it is. It’s been a trial and error thing but… I love helping kids. It’s why I get assigned the really lonely ones.”

“I guess I can see that,” Sam allowed. Everything the Xana was saying was similar to how he observed Angela behave with people. A thought occurred to him and he kept it to himself to dwell on later. “But… why do you want to stay here? I know Angie’s scared and the last thing I want to do is put her in a position to be that way. She’s had enough crap piled on her over the last few years and some of it from me.”

“But don’t you think that it’s her choice? She doesn’t have to go into the Cage but even you know she will. And you know why.” Samadean looked at Sam with a slight inquisitive look. He was standing on one of the chairs so his line of sight was improved if not by much.

Sam looked away feeling the slight rise of temper. He didn’t really like that the Xana knew the truth but he also was grateful. It helped since he really hadn’t been able to voice a lot to Dean. “Because she is… Absolution,” he murmured, “And it’s who she is.” He looked at Samadean and asked, “So you think… she needs someone to talk to?”

“Not just her. You too.” Samadean looked at the tall Winchester, amused at the turn of events. “What one feels strongly, the other does but both distinct. And I want to help if I can.”

Sam looked at the Xana. In a way, it was Angela’s baby maybe since she brought him into being. It seemed natural that he’d want to stay with them. “But what about other kids out there?”

“True but…” Samadean looked up at Sam. “I want to help if I can.”

It was no small thing when someone offered their help and it was not news to Sam if it was because of Angela. She was unique and he did have a bit of a fluffy moment with her when he told the truth about the hope she gave so freely like it was candy.

“It’s not just her but you. Truly Sam,” Samadean added as if heard Sam’s thoughts, “I want to help you.”

Sam looked at the Xana. If Dean saw him there would be difficulties but if only he or Angela could see him… “And the whole visibility thing?”

“Just you and Angie if you want but I think it’s fair that Dean sees me. I’ll try not to be to intruding.”

There was nothing else to say to that except, “Okay.”

Samadean grinned, “You won’t regret it Sam.”

“I hope not,” Sam countered as he ran a hand through his locks pretty sure that things were going to get weird. “But, Samadean, you gotta still do your job meaning help other kids.”

“That I do. Like I said, it’s not like Sully and the others. But I see what you’re saying.” Samadean grinned as he scanned Sam. “Now I see it. Truly it is a sight to behold the whole souls…” He sighed and just leapt forward and gave Sam a hug.

Sam wasn’t sure about what to do. He couldn’t well just shove the Xana away and he was essentially harmless. Slowly he wrapped his arms around the bear that was clinging to him. It only made the Xana hug him more. “Hey… um…”

“Sorry. You really have no idea how it is to be able to _see_ souls and then to see those that are paired… I see her in yours and vice versa.” Samadean then sobered. “Sorry. Like I said…”

“I understand,” Sam replied and he did. He had met a couple of beings that reacted in a similar manner and it was different depending on who it was. He remembered one time he got a scowl and a curt response from a being of vengeance but he did get a helping hand. It was more of a love-hate thing with more hate but… “I don’t have a problem but you should be to there helping people.”

Samadean smiled at Sam, “And for you, I will do that. But if you need me… call me.”

That was agreeable and Sam got the feeling that they would need that in the days to come. “Maybe you could stay for a week or two. Just until the Cage…”

“Gotcha,” Samadean replied as he jumped down and started heading towards a bookcase. “I’ll stay with the Librarian. We get along.”

Sam blinked at that, “Whatever rocks your boat.”

There was nothing more to be said and Sam realized he felt a little bit better about the whole thing. He felt he could get some sleep now and made his way towards his room. He found her already asleep and took a moment to watch her sleep. He always thought she looked peaceful when she was truly asleep.

Changing, Sam crawled into bed after shoving Gideon closer towards the foot of the bed in playful manner. The dog was only being a kiss ass and loved to tease him about it. It was one of those strange wars of affection things but Sam didn’t mind and when it came down to it, Gideon would defend him and listen to any command he gave him. He gave a rub to the dog’s ears and settled back.

Sam was barely settled when he felt the bed shift and her body pressed against his. He smiled as he turned to his side to face her and wrap his arm around her waist. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and closed his eyes. True he was scared about the Cage and it was going to happen no matter what Dean said and he was scared for her. But he could do this. They had always done this kind of thing together and it wasn’t going to change. He would be there for her as she always was for him for they were a part of each other.


	9. 11.09 The Light and the Broken Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam has been tricked back into the Cage with Lucifer and he is not alone. Angie is also in there and the both learn that Lucifer knows a few things about them. Tag to O' Brother Where Are Thou.

She never thought that she would be in this place again. Never again she thought she would be in the place where there was nowhere to run and to hide. Then again she would have never thought she would be standing in front of _him_ , in the flesh so to speak. But it was a bit naïve on her part since nothing ever was simple in her life no matter how badly she wanted it.

Deep down, she always waited for the other proverbial shoe to drop. It wasn’t that she was a pessimist; some would call her a realist. It was more because she knew deep down that she would never be free of the burdens she carried. The load may be lightened but never gone and in truth she dreaded the day when it came because it always happened. What mattered the most was taken from her and she didn’t know if she would be able to bounce back this time.

_I have a special place for you. And Sammy can watch._

It was supposed to be warded. There was no way Lucifer should have been able to do what he did. Then again she never trusted that witch bitch Rowena. She tolerated Crowley but the witch… she wanted to rip her apart. The only reason she didn’t was because it was a necessary evil and she had worked with enough of those during the centuries.

It was warded but the Cage had been damaged. And now she was back in the one place she knew there was no holds barred. She stared at the fallen angel with a bland expression as he looked at her and her love with that look of anticipation. It was something he had been planning ever since they escaped the place.

_It wasn’t God. It was me. But I do admit that he talked to you my pretty. After all, you were and still are the favorite._

It had been something she avoided talking about for a long time since she knew the boys’ feelings about God in general. But when the subject came up with Sam suggesting a trip to the Cage… it was unavoidable. Especially since Caleb, the holy angel Buddha as she called him, showed up and ended up verifying it.

She had spoken to God. It was right around the time they learned of what Castiel was up to and his desire to open up Purgatory. And the subject was something that had Sam and Dean look at her like she had lost it. Maybe she had since then she was still having trouble telling what was real and what wasn’t; she didn’t have a freaking wall courtesy of Death to help her out with. But it was a very real conversation.

It was about roses. And God, at least his image, was that of an old man who tended them but he had a bit of an eccentric demeanor to him. It was like talking to Gabriel but not quite. The topic wasn’t what Dean expected since he long accepted that she was one of God’s unofficial Power Rangers since she could do things most normal things like her couldn’t do. Sam had been thoughtful but she thought he was pitying her since that was not a good time for her mentally.

_Roses are beautiful my child. They are simple but they carry in them all that beings are._

God had shown her different colored roses. Some were colors like that which came from a child’s imagination. She had watched him water them and tend to them… like a parent does a child. She watched as he cooed over the baby buds that seemed to spring up out of nowhere and the transformations going from bud to flowering and then dying. There were some that were wilted and some had spots and she watched as he tutted over them.

_Sometimes they get hurt or are in trouble and they need a helping hand._

That was when she got bold and asked Him flat out why he thought what was going on wasn’t his problem. She didn’t expect the saddened look he gave her, one full of regret. It had her stunned since she had her ideas of God based on what she had been taught. Yet the sight of a saddened old man tugged at her heart and she gave a hug to God. No one believed that she did but she remembered that distinctly.

It was a warm feeling, not that much different when she was cuddled next to Sam. But it was intense and yet she picked up on the sadness. And regret. She didn’t understand what it meant but only that she felt the urge to make God feel better… as ridiculous as that sounded in her head. She did it and he accepted it and told her that she was everything he knew her to be. He also said something else…

“So… do you want to go first or Sammy?”

Angela looked at Lucifer. Her eyes narrowed at the fallen angel. Her tone was calm and low, “You want to punish me for something I supposedly did to you then go ahead.”

Lucifer shook a warning finger, “Oh you did do something to me. But you’re not going to get off that easily.”

Angela looked at the devil with that look of willing to charge into battle and gave a little knowing smirk, “Of course not. You like to draw it out.”

Lucifer chuckled but didn’t deny it. He looked at Sam and Angela before saying, “I will draw it out. I will make you remember everything. It was my goal when you were first here but it didn’t take. Then Darkness had to come and now…”

“So it is true then?” Sam had asked the question.

Lucifer looked at Sam, “Oh yes. My little pretty sister here was the one that fought Darkness. And if you think a chick fight is sexy… This was astronomical.” He pointed at Angela as he continued, “She was the one that bound Darkness into the Mark and slapped it one me. So… she made me.”

“Then I am sorry.”

“Oh you’re sorry now but you weren’t then.” Lucifer couldn’t help but laugh at Angela and her attempt at apology. “In fact, you were particularly vindictive. Oh that’s right. She killed you… Sam.”

Angela blinked while trying to hide the shock that was certainly showing on Sam’s face. She could sense it. This was a shocker to her but it made her wonder if it was part of Lucifer’s original plan in the first place.

Lucifer watched the expression mostly on Sam’s face and grinned, “You think I didn’t know? I was there when God created you, sister. I watched the awe and wonder when instead of one he got two and the new favorites.” He smiled as he paced in front of them. “He created a being of everything that he was, all the love, the protector of all… the Light.”

“So Angie is an angel?”

“Yeah.”

“Was,” Angela corrected more to keep the record straight. “I have no grace.”

Lucifer chortled at that. “You think in such small terms, my pretty. This is going to be fun making you remember. Who knows? Maybe Sammy here might remember.”

Angela narrowed her eyes and growled, “You will not touch him.” Her eyes flared and her powers began to make themselves known.

Lucifer took a step back a little surprised but not intimidated. “Well I didn’t expect that. You’ve become quite powerful. Maybe I should kill your twin. Either way I will ‘punish’ you as I did before.” He took a couple of steps forward and boldly reached out and caressed her cheek, “And if you really wanted to kill me you would have done so already for that.”

It was true. Angela would have killed him just for touching her but she didn’t. She wanted to but not if there was a risk to Sam. He had already been wounded deeply by the fact that Lucifer had tricked him, literally built him up with hope and then crushed him and now they were in the Cage. She could feel Sam’s pain, confusion and fear and it pissed her off. Instead she grabbed Lucifer’s offending hand and twisted it to the point where there was bone cracking and she flung him away. “I want to kill you but I won’t. I won’t be that creature.”

Lucifer rubbed his wrist, “It’s inevitable sweetie. Of you want to get out of here like you did when you escaped hell; if you want to attempt to fight Darkness on your own terms… You really need to stop being the goody two shoes.”

“Not gonna happen,” Sam voiced.

“Oh it will, Sam,” Lucifer said with an almost sad look. “Cause in case you haven’t noticed by now, one can’t live without the other. Darkness killed you and then this… You get the picture.”

Sam narrowed his eyes. Despite the fact that he had been tricked and was now trapped in the place of his nightmares… “It’s not going to happen. Not this time.”

Lucifer sighed and made a gesture to allow one of his meat hooks to have fun but it was deftly blocked and it slammed into the Cage bars making a resounding clang. He looked at Angela who was merely looking at him, her powers making a sort of orb around her. “You don’t know when to quit do you?”

Angela didn’t say anything but glared at the fallen angel. She felt Sam inch closer beside her and felt his presence. It was a calming influence and she felt her powers become more controlled. It was like that calm stormy center. It was deadly but very controlled and one too many things out there learned the hard way what happened if they fucked with it.

Sam had instinctively moved towards her. He always could sense when things were going to get out of control. Now that he had her back he was noticing how much more sensitive she was to everything. He wanted to help and keep her safe though it seemed to be the other way around at times but she said he helped her. He would be there for her if nothing else. She was always there for him and it was her strength that gave him courage.

Lucifer watched as Sam eased closer. He noticed the change overcome Angela. He still felt her power but it was different. Like it was stronger. He had never seen this before, not even when this whole thing started. This was different and it made him nervous but he was also curious to see how this round would play out. This was going to be fun. “Then prepare to enjoy this sister.”


	10. 11.10 A Light of Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They have been rescued out of the Cage but it seems that Lucifer still has one or two plans. After all she is his little pretty and he knows more about her before she is who she is. Tag to Devil's in the Details.

It was a pleasant place, if you liked being in the middle of ancient ruins. Angela looked around and examined what she saw. There seemed to be a mixture of Roman, Greek, Egyptian and even architecture that predated that. If she had to guess she would have said Atlantean and it would be a fairly good guess since she still had that chest from that island city that disappeared. And if normal people heard that Atlantis did exist…

Looking around, the place seemed like an arena of sorts, much like the Colosseum. She was not that old but according to the Alchemists in a previous life she did visit Rome but as an Egyptian princess or something like that. She bought the previous life thing since there were a few jobs that had her ‘remembering’ things that she couldn’t possibly remember. And it helped when the Winchesters experienced something similar. The princess thing was a bit of a stretch since she would never consider herself that even though she was still named the warrior princess.

There seemed to be an ominous feeling to the place since there was mist floating around. It was clichéd but effective since she had her fair share of hanging around misty swamp banks and creepy cemeteries. She adjusted her jacket and checked the pockets for whatever might help and tried reaching out. It was first instinct of hers…

“I don’t think you’ll be able to talk to Castiel or that bird brain friend of yours.”

Angela turned to see Lucifer standing there, looking at her with a tolerant smile. She stared at him with a slight narrowing of her eyes and replied, “What are you doing here. We got out.”

Lucifer took his time and paced slowly in front of her looking amused at something. If only she knew what was going on. “That goes to show you how much you know. And you’ve forgotten quite a bit.”

“I know you said I was around and slapped the Mark on you,” Angela countered having heard the story before. She heard it from Amara and then Lucifer.

“That’s part of it. You’ve forgotten your true self; what made you the greatest of us and Dad’s favorite.”

“And I don’t care.”

“You should.” Lucifer knew that he didn’t have to be polite since in the end Sam said no and he went to plan B. That ended up being fun since it was very physical and he liked it. “You were the one that set things in motion to the here and now.”

“Don’t even play that game,” Angela warned.

“Play what game?” Lucifer shrugged like he didn’t know what was going on. “We both know that you have had a profound effect on everything that has happened since Dad sent you here along with your other half.”

Angela stared at the fallen angel. She had no memory of being an angel and yet others told her she was. While Lucifer was the prince of lies, he never told a lie when it came to her. If anything he was more honest than the most trustworthy of allies she had and that was weird in a creepy way. But he also had a way of playing upon her default mental torture when she was feeling guilt over her choices. She replied, “Everyone has an effect. It’s what makes the world turn.”

“True but let’s face it. In order for Dad to create that hellhole you call earth, you needed to bind his sister. You did that and created the Mark and slapped it on me but I couldn’t resist and truth be told… I didn’t want to. So I reached out and in the end I got Cain and… you know the whole story.” Lucifer gestured as if impatient to tell the story. He pointed at her, “You basically started the world on this path.”

Angela was silent for a moment. She had thought about it before now but she refused to let it bring her down. She had no memory of it so why should she dwell on it? Because it was her nature and she always tried to take other people’s burdens from them. “Maybe. But what good is it if I don’t remember?”

Lucifer grinned, “And that is where this comes in.” He stepped closer until he was almost toe to toe with her. “Now this won’t hurt a bit.”

Angela opened her mouth but Lucifer had already pressed his first two fingers to her forehead. She saw that they were still in the same area but she saw a couple of angels standing around. She recognized Michael, Raphael, Gabriel, Lucifer and Amitiel and a few others. She knew it was them but they looked different and she could see where people got the idea that they wore the clothes that they did. She also saw how different things were then. Lucifer wasn’t who he was now and Michael and the others didn’t really look like the dicks she knew them to be.

They were chatting and it was obvious that they were discussing the matter of Darkness. It appeared that things hadn’t been going well until Gabriel gestured and they turned. It was like seeing her some great grandniece Elena walking but it wasn’t her. Angela knew though that she was looking at herself and it sort of explained why she liked to dress like a warrior. Here she was dressed for battle and…

Behind her angel self, Angela saw her other half. She was certain this was Lucifer playing upon her current emotions and attachments. He would know that she and Sam were an item and he did imply that he knew about their bond. Yet to see the possibility of Sam as an angel, that was breathtaking and she knew that there was a difference when there was the presence of grace.

She watched as the group of angels discussed a plan and she watched the reaction of the angels. She noted Lucifer’s looks and then focused on Sam. She knew it was a memory since hallucinations felt different. “Is this what you did with Sam when you left me behind?”

Lucifer shrugged as he took the opportunity to touch her on the shoulder, “Well I had to try with words to convince him the feasibility of my plan. You were the one that said words often worked better than action.”

“And what is this? Trying to convince me to open the Cage and get you out?”

“As I said before,” Lucifer paced behind her and breathed low and sultry in her ear, “I have considered you and it is still an option.”

Apparently Lucifer hadn’t forgotten her offer from before and she hadn’t either. It was probably the closest she had ever come to completely losing herself and in essence becoming hell’s bitch. It was also a reminder of how far she would go for the ones she loved and in particular Sam. “So this is you reminding me of the options.”

“Of course. But Sam said no and I had to go with plan B and boy was that thrilling. I had almost forgotten how your war cry and your skills just turn me on.” He stepped back and grinned at her. “You know I actually wanted you. First time I saw you.”

“And we know how that ended up.”

“Yes. You got your other half and had no interest in anyone else. You really did invent the ‘let’s just be friends’ thing,” Lucifer mocked as he simpered at her.

Angela stared at the memory Lucifer conjured feeling saddened by the whole thing. She felt sad for a memory that was lost probably permanently to her and yet she did feel some responsibility. In the end though… “But you took on the Mark.”

“What?”

Angela turned to look at Lucifer and stared hard at him. “You had to take on the Mark.”

“I took it. You slapped it on me.”

“No,” she shook her head. “You had to take on the Mark. It can’t be forced upon anyone. It has to have consent. You consented.”

Lucifer scoffed, “Yeah I did. You’re arguing semantics.”

“And for good reason,” Angela pointed out, “If I created the Mark, that meant that I would have taken it on but you said no. You said you would.” She paused a moment since she was certain that she was pulling at strings. “Granted that I’m pulling at strings but… if I know how angels work, it has to be by consent. Your demon spawn don’t have to have consent but you do.”

Lucifer sighed and narrowed his eyes, “Very clever my pretty. You don’t remember a damned thing but you are good at thinking things through.” He sighed as he paced around, “Well think about this: if you won’t let me out, I can’t help you recover what you lost when Dad sent you here.”

“And let you run amok on earth and start the Apocalypse again? Hell no.” Angela glared angrily at the devil knowing that he had a way with words and she wasn’t going to fall for them. The memory he shot her was just a teaser… a fantasy of sorts.

“Okay that would have been a sideshow but you and I both know that they real threat is Amara,” Lucifer pointed out. He peered at Angela hoping to see some leeway there. “You need me.”

“I don’t need you.” Angela clenched her hands in a fist and stood firm. “I can find my own way and I’m not alone.”

“Oh yes, rely on those two. Everything they have done was not because they cared about the world but it was because they cared about each other and look at the blood that was spilled,” Lucifer pointed out like he was shouting at her. “I tried to get this point over with Sam. Granted I liked the take charge attitude he had before shacking up with that girl and her dog. Big mistake there. But…”

Angela knew about that. She didn’t have to see it but she could sense Sam’s emotions when Lucifer took him on a trip down memory lane. She felt them and she felt when he remembered his time with Amelia. It surprised her; he hadn’t been happy but guilty. It seemed that whatever Lucifer thought was a product of Sam being able to misdirect. “And in the end it is because of their devotion that things worked out.”

Lucifer snorted at that, “And what of the cost. Can you honestly say that the ends justify the means?”

It was like a round robin of thoughts and memories as Angela recalled the major decisions. She could see that Lucifer was waiting for an answer. “In the end… yes. Granted mistakes were made but the pieces were picked up and moved on.”

Lucifer shook his head, “You always tried to be the peace maker. Never making a decision unless it was put on the line. Has to be all that Light and Love Dad created you with.” He looked away in disgust.

“No. It’s the ability to see a larger picture and one that I’ve always been guilty of despite what my feelings are in the moment. I’m not perfect but in the end the hardest decisions I’ve made have been because of that.” She looked back at the memory that still had been playing while they were talking and then back at the fallen angel, “The one truly selfish thing I’ve done was to follow Sam into the Cage. I didn’t go because I wanted to but because of Sam.”

Lucifer studied her. Her speech had rendered him quiet as he studied her. He always knew that she gave of herself for others but to do something for herself, it was unheard of. “You came into the pit willingly for yourself?”

“I wanted Sam back and I was willing to pay the price,” she offered.

Lucifer nodded at her, “Well I guess you aren’t the angel everyone paints you to be.”

“I never claimed otherwise. You on the other hand… pride comes before the fall.”

Lucifer gave a warning finger at her. He had his fun and games but he was now serious. “Don’t even. You don’t really think you can do this can you?”

“I have in the past.” Angela gave a shrug knowing that it would probably annoy the fallen angel but what point was therein being nice? She would humor him.

“You can’t. One day you will remember what it took. Deep down you will come to realize that you want me there with you and that you _need_ me to fight with you.”

“Not in this lifetime.”

As Angela turned to go, she was halted by Lucifer saying, “Alright… but do you do know that she will gun for Sam. She will kill him like she did the last time.”

Angela turned to look at the fallen angel with a hard look. She stared long and hard. Her eyes narrowed into a glare. But she didn’t say anything.

Lucifer grinned at her expression and gestured at her that she was to remember, “Remember. I know what Amara knows. I can help you get back what you lost before she kills him. And she will kill Sam. That’s a promise.”

Angela would have said something but the mist had picked up creating a cloudy atmosphere that she couldn’t see. She looked around for any trace of the angel.

_Angie?_

She looked around at the sound of her name. She didn’t see anything but mist. It was thick. She almost didn’t see the heavy shadow…

“Angie?”

Angela looked down at her shoulder to find Sam’s hand there. She blinked and it took her a moment to realize where she was. She looked up at Sam and apologized, “Sorry. Just spacing out.”

Sam looked down at her with a concerned look on her face as she resumed the activity of brushing her hair before bed. She had been doing that when she spaced out and became nonresponsive. It scared him a bit but he knew that it had happened before right when they first got Hibah as a baby. It was rare when it happened but still…

She hadn’t said much about what happened when they were in the Cage. There wasn’t much she could say since Lucifer told her to stay put until they got back. The only thing they could agree on was when they made it back and Lucifer decided to beat on him. That was when it wasn’t a fight but a battle… at least on her end. And when they got out, she spent her time asking him if he was okay until he put a stop to it and asked her about herself.

Looking at her and studying her, Sam knew that this was going to take its toll on her more than the Purgatory thing and the other crap. They didn’t know about Amara and what she was up to but… Sam was used to having a target on his back. He had it since Azazel bled into his mouth when he was six months old. And he knew Angela had one but this was different.

“Can we do this?”

Sam looked down and saw Angela looking up at him. He saw the question in her eyes and knew she was thinking about recent events. “We’ll find a way,” he replied. He then frowned, “Do you think we can?”

“I’ll always have faith,” Angela admitted but her gaze drifted away as she thought about Lucifer’s last words. “Lucifer called to me. It’s why I spaced out,” she admitted, “And he wants me to get him out.”

“You know that’s not possible.”

“I know.” Angela paused for a moment and then said, “He showed me what it was like then. He showed me as an angel.” She saw the look and while Sam learned the truth, he was not inclined to believe Satan. She explained, “He may be the prince of lies but he has never lied to me and you can’t fake a memory and I know the difference.”

Sam didn’t doubt that. The few stints dealing with previous life memories a few years back had him not so quick to dismiss it. To him, this sounded like one of Lucifer’s methods of getting to her and it looked like it might succeed. “And did you consider that…”

“Of course but it’s hard to ignore when you are put in the equation,” she replied softly and looked up at him. “And you are the one person I would be selfish over.” She looked at her lap and sighed, “This isn’t going to go away Sam and I don’t know what to do. I have no memory of what they are talking about and yet…”

Sam said nothing but drew her into an embrace. He didn’t like this either. While they were out of the Cage, he couldn’t help but think that it wasn’t completely done and if Lucifer could still reach her… Just one step at a time.


	11. 11.11 The Light of a Child

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eileen may have been trained by a hunter but she learned some important things from Angie. A look at how it felt seeing her again. Tag to Into the Mystic.

For thirty years it had been nothing but revenge; revenge for killing the thing that killed her parents when she was a baby. Eileen knew that she was close when she tracked it to the retirement home. She went in undercover as one of the maids and things went well until she met the Winchesters.

At first she thought they were the thing that she was hunting. She had set up the trap to bind them. She really didn’t want to since Sam seemed to be a nice guy. But she had to. She had to hunt the thing that killed her parents. And she almost had him until she stepped in. Eileen thought she was seeing a ghost the moment she saw her.

She looked like she did when Eileen first met her but a little older, like the world was written upon her face. It was an odd thing to think about but it was the best she could come up with since she knew that the woman in front of her was older than most people. Eileen never thought she would see her again after the one hunt that ended up in a disaster.

 _Eileen_ , the woman signed, _you have the wrong person._

Eileen could only stare at the woman as she debated. She thought that she had died so long ago. She heard the rumors, the stories that were told of the woman who did things since then but she didn’t want to believe it. She had seen what had happened and…

The woman looked at her with a firm expression. It was neither threatening nor submissive. That was how Eileen remembered her. She merely waited and would react to the choice being made. It was how Eileen learned to read people, to read her opponent if she needed to use her fists and it worked in general when she hunted. She knew that the woman was waiting for her to make her move and Eileen knew that she would go full on battle.

Eileen may have been deaf and she could read lips but she had learned to see other things. She looked at the woman and knew from her posture that she would attack if provoked. But she would also defend herself if she were attacked. It was how Eileen used to be drawn into sparring fights; it was a test of her skills. Eileen didn’t move as she gripped her knife and held it ready to attack.

 _I know you are hunting the thing that killed your parents._ The woman had relaxed a little and started signing while speaking. More likely it was for the benefit of Sam. _It is what you were trained for since you were rescued. It was why you were sent to me._

Eileen blinked and replied out loud, “You are not her. You died that day. I saw it.” She pointed at herself to emphasize her point.

 _I should have died that night_ , the woman signed as she spoke, _I was careless but only because you were in danger._

“I can take care of myself.”

 _I know._ The woman then stopped speaking and went on signing, _But you meant a lot to me. Still do. There hasn’t been a day that has gone by that I haven’t thought about the things I have done, the people I left behind and I have some regrets. One was letting you live without me._

“You didn’t raise me. Why would you care?” Eileen knew that she was revealing more than what she wanted to in front of Sam. Yet seeing the woman was bringing back memories that she kept locked away because they made her cry. “You only owed Lillian a favor.”

 _It was a favor for a favor but I didn’t see it that way._ The woman lowered her hands and studied Eileen. She lifted her hands and signed more, _When the hunter brought you to me, she wanted me to heal you. But I couldn’t. I told her to raise you and take care of you and to teach you that being deaf is not a curse but a gift._

Eileen looked at the woman. She knew the story well. It was one of the few that she had remembered when she had asked. “That I could do what I wanted by learning to use my other senses.” She then chuckled a bit and added, “You slapped me.”

“Only because you were a brat the first time I started training you,” the woman said out loud, “And you slapped me first.”

Eileen was starting to be convinced that the woman was who she said she was. “Do you remember what you used to call me?”

The woman smiled and made a sign. It was enough and Eileen released Sam even though the woman could have done so before letting it get this far. Once Sam was released, Eileen walked up towards the woman and looked at her. She was as she remembered and couldn’t help but grab the woman in a hug. She said out loud, “It is you.”

The hug lasted as long as Eileen held onto the woman. When she broke it, she spared a glance at Sam and noticed that he didn’t appear surprised at all from the turn of events. As it turned out it wasn’t unusual for him to meet up with people that knew the woman, his wife, from previous encounters. He was actually nice about it and asked her how she knew his wife.

The hunt worked out in that they got the banshee. Eileen killed it by herself and her old friend watched her do it much like a teacher watches their student. Eileen knew that her teacher could have taken on the banshee but instead she went to help the other hunter Dean. The only help she gave was trapping the banshee. True the symbols were touched but Eileen knew that wasn’t the only thing.

The first time her teacher had used her powers… it was something Eileen couldn’t forget. The feeling was unique. She could feel the power behind it but she also sensed that it was old. Not old like an elderly person but old like it was ancient. Since then she had experienced similar abilities but it didn’t feel the same. Her teacher was different and Eileen kept it a secret since she sensed that she might not be allowed to see her again if she said something.

Eileen never regretted keeping that secret about her teacher. In the end she kept returning once a year for a month. It was always in a different location depending upon where her teacher was at; whatever job she was working. Each time had its lesson and time for when Eileen could be a normal person.

There were times when there was no training, no learning about something that Eileen had never known before. It was just living. She was encouraged to do things that kids her age would be doing. Though there were those times when the things they did that were normal did have lessons attached to them. It was how her teacher pretty much worked.

_Most people only see the obvious. Sometimes you have to see beyond the obvious to see what the larger purpose is._

Her teacher not helping her was part of that lesson. Then again she had always told Eileen that there was only so much she could show her. The rest had to come from her being able to put those skills into practice. Eileen had taken that to heart and put it towards getting revenge for her parents but now that the job was done… it wasn’t all it cracked up to be. Now it was time for her teacher and her companions to leave. And she didn’t want it to happen.

“You know,” her teacher signed and spoke, “This isn’t goodbye.”

Eileen looked at the woman who had bene her teacher. She replied, “I know. But… I saw you. You died.”

“I survived that. And I stayed away… To protect you.”

“And I can take care of myself.”

Eileen would have said more but her teacher stopped talking and began signing, _I know you can. But you don’t need me bringing you trouble._

Eileen frowned at that and signed back, _What trouble? I’m a hunter._

_Look beyond the obvious, Sweetpea._

Eileen knew what that meant. She understood now that there were things that her teacher knew that she could never tell to anyone and that they were beyond what she had been taught. It was painful to hear but Eileen understood. She remembered when she had been first taught that and how sad her teacher had looked and here she was still with that same look but less sad. Nodding, she replied, _I understand. But you don’t have to do everything alone._

_I’m not alone. I have you._

Eileen felt tears prick at her eyes when her teacher signed what they used to tell each other how much they meant to each other. She replied in kind before giving her a hug. Out loud she said, “I won’t forget, Angie.”

As Eileen watched the Impala drive away, she felt happy, truly happy and it was a first in a long time. Apart from killing the banshee, she found the person that made her life full. Her teacher wasn’t dead but alive and always there no matter what. Everything she learned about the deeper lessons came from the teacher that she learned early on was part vampire and that vampire was a light in her world.


	12. 11.12 Light Growing Pains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angie stays in Sioux Falls mostly to give Claire hunting tips and talk to Alex but it looks like she needs a little girl talk too. Good thing Jody Mills is around. Tag to Don't You Forget About Me.

“You know the whole being the silent one… kind of…”

Angela lowered her fork to look at Claire while finishing the bite of chicken she had taken. She studied the girl while at the same time studied Alex. Both girls were sitting across from her while Jody was at the head of the table. When Claire didn’t speak, she raised her brow in silent query.

Claire and Alex shifted slightly in their seats. They were not sure if the woman was addressing one or both and the look made them want to confess their deepest, darkest secrets. A look at Jody told them that the sheriff wasn’t at all disturbed by it. Rather she was accepting it and was eating her meal smoothly. She did ask, “You wanted to say something Claire?”

Claire looked at Jody and then at Angela who was still sitting there and waiting. The woman wasn’t really moving but waiting for her to answer. It was one of the more unnerving things about her and it made Claire think she was constantly in trouble. At least it felt that way since Angela agreed to stay for the week and teach her a few things about hunting and to teach Alex a bit more about self-defense. She made a slight sound and her mouth moved but nothing came out.

It was going to be one of those long awkward silences until Alex asked, “What were you and Sam doing when you said good bye?”

Claire shot a look at Alex and the girl shrugged and said, “What? You didn’t say anything.”

Jody had looked up, curious about the answer too. She knew that Angela and Sam were together but the way they interacted… It had her curious but she was too polite to say anything except, “I don’t think…”

“It wasn’t good bye,” Angela answered. She looked at the three people staring at her and then took a bite of her meal. “It was more of a see you later.”

“You mean that kiss on his neck?”

Angela nodded as she looked at the girls. She took another bite while studying Jody. The last dinner conversation involved secrets being revealed and awkwardness. She merely blinked and ended up rapping knuckles for that much to the surprise of everyone. Call it her prude sense but it was more along the lines of just good manners. “We never say good bye.”

“Never?”

“Nope.”

Alex looked at Claire, both thinking that it was weird. Finally being bold, Alex pressed, “So making out like in a porn film is saying see you later?”

Jody choked on her water and an awful silence followed. As far as she could tell, Alex just insulted Angela and that part of her that was not human. She was worried that she was going to have to be the law and it occurred to her that she might not be able to.

She didn’t have to worry since Angela merely stared at the girls before going back to eating. It was clear that the question wasn’t going to be answered at the dinner table. If there was one thing Jody knew about Angela it was that the woman had a thing about table manners. Even when Sam and Dean had been wolfing down food, one look had them eating decently.

Nothing more was said until after the table was cleared and the dishes done. Angela was in the living room reading when the girls walked in. She didn’t look up but said, “It’s a vampire thing.”

Alex and Claire paused in what they were doing. It took a full minute for them to realize that Angela was answering their question from earlier. Alex blinked at that. After her recent experience with vampires, she wasn’t sure she heard it right. True she had seen the eye flare and the teeth but she had grown up with a vampire family and the things she had done…

Claire was interested since she knew Angela wasn’t completely human. She had always suspected there was something different about her especially the way she hunted down her prey. She gave a slight grin and asked, “Vampire? You went native?”

Angela had looked up from her book and put it in her lap. She studied Claire’s eager look and Alex’s nervous one. She knew that Alex was having a tough time with what happened. Debating internally, she finally replied, “I’m half vampire.”

“No way.” Claire was excited at that. “I mean…”

“How…?” Alex was not even sure that was possible.

“Technically I’m a dhampir. I have one parent human and one vampire. Whichever one is which doesn’t really matter.”

“Do you drink blood?” Claire was rattling questions off oblivious to Alex being quiet.

“Only if I’m seriously injured or sick.” Angela withheld the fact that sometimes a once in a while snack was necessary if she was deficient in vitamins or something like that. “For the most part, I gorge on anything with calories. I can pretty much devour enough food for two people in one meal.”

That was enough to hold their attention for a while. Claire asked more questions about dhampirs in general and even asked if they lived as long as regular vampires. That had Angela turn the book around she had been reading and pointed at the picture of the portrait that Chuck had of her and pointed at its information. It had both girls looking at her like she was insane until Claire muttered, “Talk about cougars.”

At that point Jody scolded Claire for that even though she was a bit surprised herself. She had long accepted that people loved who they loved and she wasn’t judging Sam or Angela especially not after the way they looked at each other. It was just surprising that age…

“Trust me. I’ve seen worse and it’s hilarious,” Angela replied recalling a few choice jobs. She gave a slight grin at that.

“So,” Alex felt prompted now to ask, “You and Sam?”

Bluntly, Angela replied, “He’s my mate… or husband. Mate is the more common term.” Seeing that she had their attention and it was like a weird cheesy romance novel to them, she couldn’t help but give a slight grin at it. “Either way we’re together.”

“And what you two were doing?” Claire couldn’t help but prompt along.

“A vampire thing. We’re very affectionate.”

What was surprising was that Alex started giggling at that. It had sounded absurd but she knew it was the truth when Angela looked at her. She apologized, “I’m sorry but… I’ve never seen vampires be affectionate.”

“You see it mostly with dhampirs and vampires that are born. The ones that kept you… not so much.”

“And Sam sniffing your neck… that a part of it too?” At the look Claire was getting she frowned, “What? She does it too.”

Before it got out hand with Jody scolding the girls on principle and for the violation of privacy, Angela cut in, “Scent is a big part of it. When Sam became my mate, he grew a bit more sensitive with it and I’ve always had a super sniffer. Like the fact that deodorant Claire is wearing is the worst product to come out.” She paused and saw she had their attention and continued, “A lot of what goes on between mated pairs is nonverbal. Goes for all species.”

“So what made you decide to get married?” Alex was now curious but she wasn’t sure how to word what she wanted to know and just went with something less offensive.

“It was an accident.”

“What?”

Angela took in the three expressions staring at her wide eyed. Sam had always told her that the way she revealed things had people wondering if she was kidding or not. She knew that and did it mostly to protect herself but lately it was more of a means to have some fun. This time though it was serious and it seems something that the girls were responding to while she was there for the week. She repeated, “It was an accident. We didn’t know we were mated until a year later.”

Before the questions started Angela pulled down the left side of her shirt to reveal the “scar” that she had for the last five years. “Sam’s mark.” She only smirked then and refused to go into more details. She only said, “Context and thorough understanding.”

~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~

“You did that on purpose.”

Angela turned to look at Jody as they were washing dishes. The girls had gone to bed more from the fact that she had given a look that was mirrored by Jody; call it a double teaming. She teased, “Did what on purpose?”

“Start talking about vampires and then about sex. Didn’t we do that when the boys were here?” Jody handed a couple of plates over to be dried.

“The girls asked about my kind and then it started asking about why Sam and I do things the way we do.” Angela wiped the plates cry before stacking them. “I was circumspect and in truth a lot of it is intimate even if it appears like puppy love.” Her lip twitched at that since she could recall the few times she had abused it mostly to tease Dean and Sam was in on it too.

Jody looked at Angela with a knowing look even though the other didn’t see it. She wasn’t too put out by it since it was pretty clean. “He really loves you. I saw it when we were trying to get Dean back through time. And now…”

Angela smiled as she dried another dish. She had offered to do it as a courtesy and thank you to Jody but the sheriff wouldn’t have it. This was a compromise and she really wanted someone to talk to but was unsure how to broach the subject. “And I love him. Took me almost 2 years for me to finally say it and I was a coward.”

“It’s always scary when you take that step,” Jody offered, “But when you know, eventually you just let it out. And you realize how much it really means when you lose it.”

“I know how that feels,” Angela offered quietly. “And the times you are lucky that it isn’t serious…” She stared at the plate she was holding and thought about things.

Jody realized that Angela had drifted off and turned to see her staring at the plate she was holding but not looking at it. She had noticed her doing that a couple of times when they were working on the case; like the woman was in deep thought and the world vanished. She watched as Angela lowered the plate as if it would protect her.

Following what she had seen Sam do, Jody reached out and squeezed Angela’s shoulder and called her name. The reaction was a gentler version, less of a jerk and more of a head turn, and Angela apologized, “Sorry. Been spacing out a bit more than I like.” She cleared her throat and put the plate down and started drying her hands.

“Thinking about more than the usual.” Jody gave a slow smile as she noticed the expression on Angela’s face as she gave a pat to her middle. “Not that uncommon when you have a job like the one you do.”

Angela blinked at Jody. “How…?”

“Clothes were the first hint. It looks like you just decided to wear Sam’s clothes all of a sudden.”

“Umm…”

“That and a few other things. The spacing out mostly and you tend to lower your hand. Not to mention the lurking of Sam.”

“Ummm…”

Jody knew that Angela didn’t expect it. She was probably used to people attempting to hit the mark and missing. One thing she noticed though that while Angela was a grown woman, a few things she did were more along the lines of a shy teenager and it made her feel motherly about it but she didn’t dare unless Angela made the first step and asked. She smiled and said, “It’s okay. I was there too.”

Angela was still speechless about Jody knowing her secret. Well it was a secret to the world and for good reason and not so much a secret to Sam and Dean. Yet she had wanted to tell someone and Jody was the closest thing. If Ellen had been alive, it would have been her. Finally voiced, “It’s true.”

It was not exactly the words but Jody knew Angela well enough to read between the lines. She had never met a woman that was basically shy about things that would bring joy. Then again she understood where it was coming from. She went with impulse and gave Angela a hug and it was returned much to her surprise. She could feel the relief in it and guessed that was what she had wanted apart from what she was teaching the girls about hunting. “How long?”

“Nine weeks.”

Jody merely smiled at that. She figured that as much when she gave Angela a pat through the layers of Sam’s clothes. “How do you feel about it? Really?”

Angela let out a breath as she thought about it a little. Her hand went to her abdomen and it felt the swell underneath the layers. “Happy. Surprise.” She looked at Jody and let out, “Scared.”

“And that’s normal,” Jody replied smiling. She then had an idea and gestured for Angela to follow her to the living room. At the hesitation she beckoned, “It’s okay. Come on.”

The two women sat in the living room and had a talk. It was enough to reassure Angela and Jody was pleased to see the relief that came on the other girl’s face. They spent the night just talking and Jody gave her advice. It wasn’t until the next day that Jody noticed a slight change in the girls and how they interacted with Angela. She had her suspicions but in the end things went as planned but it was like taking care of three girls instead of two. 


	13. 11.13 Bite of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean is usually the one that gets some action on Valentine's Day. He does but then discovers that he isn't the only one and it catches him by surprise. A conversation with his favorite juju witch reveals that it is a deep seated fear that makes him the awesome big brother. Tag to Love Hurts.

One of the things Dean Winchester prided himself on apart from his ability to hunt and his priority to his baby, was the ability to satisfy the ladies when they asked for it. He considered it his civic duty to all the single ladies out there. Valentine’s Day used to be his favorite holiday when he used to troll bars for single women. Now he didn’t do that anymore since he had one woman that made him satisfied in all forms.

As he walked into the bunker, he couldn’t help but smile. She had chased him first and he chased her back. Then she used her little electricity trick. And she got creative with it. Of course he was creative too. At least she told him enough to stoke his ego but he didn’t care. And there was always a chance for improve on a repeat performance. That was what put the smug look of satisfaction on his face when he walked in on his brother at it again with the laptop. It was considerable effort to not roll his eyes at that.

“Is that a hickey?”

Dean gave his smug look at his brother while hanging up his jacket. That came somewhere between round two and three. He joked, “It was Valentine’s Day. I can’t help it if I’m a hopeless romantic.”

“You got half of that right.”

Dean turned to look at his brother while Sam was doing his laptop dancing. He poured his coffee and asked, “How’s Angie?”

“Fine. She’s sleeping.”

“Have fun being her personal slave?” Dean couldn’t help but tease his brother over his mother henning of their girl. He didn’t blame Sam really but he had witnessed the last couple of weeks and he thought Angela was going to strangle them both.

“It was fine.”

“Fine?”

“Yeah.” Sam turned to look at his brother to find that Dean was looking at him like he had just gave him a mountain of bullshit. “It was fine,” he asserted, “And stop being a nosy bitch.”

“I’m a nosy bitch?”

Sam didn’t answer more because it would rise to Dean’s bait of getting him upset by leading him on with innuendos. They hardly bothered him anymore since he had learned long ago that it didn’t mean anything. Lately though he had become a little more sensitive and he didn’t want to upset her. It wasn’t good for her since it made her sick or in a mood to throw a bathtub through a window.

Dean would have pressed but at that moment the subject of discussion came walking in. She was wearing one of Sam’s shirts again and light sweatpants. It was a strange thing to see on a normal day but this was the new normal for the time being. That wasn’t what held his attention though. What held his attention was the tousled look of satisfaction she was wearing on her face. Her hair was hanging in a loose braid over her shoulder and her eyes were still sleepy but it had that look he knew so well. “Good night?”

Angela merely hummed as she closed her eyes and rotated her shoulders to stretch them a little. The collar of the flannel shirt slipped downward since it was ridiculously oversized on her because it was Sam’s and revealed what was unmistakably a bite mark, a literal bite mark on the left side of her neck. Dean blinked as he saw it while sipping his coffee and couldn’t help but ask, “Bug bite?”

“Hmm?” Angela looked at him with a puzzled look that was still laced with sleep.

Dean gestured to his neck wondering why she looked at him like he was insane. She absently rubbed the area where the bite mark was while wrapping her other arm around her middle. She looked at him before shifting on her feet and spotting Sam made her way over to him. He watched as Sam smiled at her and welcomed the kiss. He wanted to leave since it felt like an intrusion even though he had seen them kiss before. There was one difference to that kiss though.

Dean had gotten used to seeing the strange and unusual ever since he met the dhampir. There were things he and Sam learned over the years and there were still times that she surprised him. Right in front of him, she pulled down Sam’s collar to reveal a bite mark that was obviously from her since he could make out the pronounced canine marks. Dean watched as she kissed the bite and actually licked it but it wasn’t like it was sexual since she also blew her breath on it. When she straightened up, it was less red than before.

Nothing was actually said except for a hum and a purr or a growl from her and Sam responding with a slight hum. Dean raised his brow at that and blinked as Sam kissed her hand before letting her go to the fridge where she pulled out a bag of blood, tucked it under her arm, picked up the mug of tea that Sam had made her and left. He waited until he was sure that she was a fair distance away before asking, “Condition thing?”

Sam snapped out of his reverie and looked at his brother with an annoyed expression. “You can say it you know. She’s pregnant.”

“I know but…” Dean paused a moment before changing track, “She bit you.”

“She’s bitten me before. No big deal.” Sam motioned towards his forearm to indicate when she had bitten him to get blood. “She needed it.”

“She needed to bite you on the neck? Let me guess you felt the need to do the same?”

Sam shrugged his shoulders wondering why Dean was getting a little too excited about what was normal to him. “It’s no big deal and… she likes it.” He turned back towards his laptop to finish looking at what he had been looking at. “So I think I got a job.”

Dean knew enough about reading between the lines and could guess his brother had a bit of rough sex with his wife. He had seen enough that morning to guess. “Isn’t that kind of thing not a good idea?”

“What’s not a good idea?”

“You know… it.”

Sam looked at Dean like he was crazy and continued, “Anyway this looks to be a case…”

~0~0~0~0~

“And so it just carries on like it didn’t happen.”

Haley looked at Dean as he paced in front of her as she sat on the bed. She propped her forearms on her knees as she watched in bemusement. “Well it really wasn’t a big deal. It’s not odd for couples to show affection in public.”

Dean turned to look at Haley and he couldn’t help but notice the lingerie she was wearing. He was slightly distracted but not enough to stop him from telling her about their last hunt of a killer curse. “Hale, it’s one thing to do that in front of me but when she freed Sam they did that growl talk thing and I thought I saw some tongue action.”

Haley started chucking at Dean. “So?”

Dean looked at Haley wide eyed, “Hale…” He gestured but didn’t say anything else.

Haley took pity on Dean and stopped chuckling. She smiled at him like a parent would humor a child. “Dean, trust me. It’s completely normal. Now get your ass in this bed before I chase you down.”

The stunned look turned to a smirk as Dean replied, “You chase me? You think you can… witch?”

Haley smirked at him as she crouched on the bed before springing off it and pouncing on Dean. She ended up knocking him over and she straddled him. She grinned, “I know I can Winchester.”

Dean grinned slyly and maneuvered so he pinned her to the floor. He managed to pin her arms, his chest touching hers and his face mere inches from kissing her into submission. “Not good enough.”

“Oh no?”

It was a playful game of throwing punches and power until Haley had Dean pinned on the bed and she was straddling his waist. She had his hands pinned like he was chained up and she wasn’t using cuffs or silk scarfs. She had him at her mercy and they both knew it. She won this time around and she showed it by leaning forward and giving him a deep kiss before pulling away and just sat there to play with him. She said, “Dean, what about it really bothers you? Are you afraid someone is going to say something?”

Not knowing if it was part of the game or not, Dean didn’t care. He wanted to get it off his chest and while he wasn’t usually one to be involved in intimate conversation, he had been working on it and he owed it to the witch that now had him at her mercy. He saw it was part of the game when she absent began playing with the waistband of his sweats. He replied, “A little but I just find it weird. I mean Angie has always been a bit of a prude when it comes to hers and Sam’s relationship. She blushes when Sam teases her with innuendo.”

Haley thought about it a moment as she played with Dean’s sweats. She tickled him with her nails and noted his reaction. “Well I do say it isn’t a big deal and by showing it in front of you… kind of makes it official.”

“Oh I get me making fun of Sam and occasionally teasing her but…” Dean hitched his breath slightly when Haley teased his skin. She did that electricity thing again and it was driving him crazy. “But what worries me is like she didn’t know Sam bit her. She actually rubbed it and didn’t acknowledge it.”

“It’s a vamp thing,” Haley offered as she continued to tease Dean. She then pulled off her shirt and teased him with her bra. “Now I know you don’t research like you should but vampires are very private with extreme shows of emotion and intimacy and show more normal and human ways to people not of the immediate family. You are family so Angie is very comfortable with it. I suspect the looks she shot you is more along the lines of asking you why are bringing up the obvious.”

Dean was focused on Haley’s bra and frustrated that she had him pinned. He heard everything though. “So by licking Sam’s bite and kissing it in front of me is showing her affection and she’s comfortable about it in front of me?”

“Mmm-hmm.” Haley just sat back and raked her fingernails on Dean’s bare chest. “I’m surprised you didn’t realize that considering you have been a family since… oh more than five years?”

“As you pointed out, I don’t do my research… unless it is in depth.” Dean was focused on her movements. He managed to shift his hips and grind against her only to earn a gentle smack. There was still some sting to it but he wasn’t repentant and did it again. “I just never knew her to be a biter.”

“Well to become mates they would have had to bite each other and draw blood the first time they…” Haley left it off as she set about punishing Dean more. “You do know about mate marks after all.”

“Don’t remind… Hale!”

Haley chuckled at the response. She liked to experiment as much as Dean did. “What’s the matter?” She gave him an innocent expression and ended up laughing when he growled at her. “See? You got the hang of it.”

Dean growled some more until she came up and gave him a kiss. He sighed and sobered, “I actually know quite a bit Hale. I just… I’m worried because being pregnant is making her a little off. I mean I heard about women and hormones but… it’s like all caution is being thrown to the wind here and we still haven’t come up with a plan against Amara and I know you know that this whole thing about Angie once being and angel… I don’t know.”

Haley looked at Dena as he looked away at nothing in particular. She studied him and her expression softened more. She undid the spell as she leaned forward to kiss him slowly and gently. “I know you’re worried and maybe it is because of the pregnancy but did you ever think she is thinking the same thing? And that maybe her intimacy with Sam is more reassurance to her?”

Dean accepted the kiss and when he shifted he found that Haley had undid his binding. He raised his arms to wrap them around the witch. He breathed in her scent and nuzzled her hair. “Not really but kind of makes sense. Sam will never leave her.”

“And I won’t leave you.”

Dean looked up at Haley and saw the truth. True they did go their separate ways but only to hunt. She always came even when he didn’t call. She had a way of knowing and he had a similar way. He went to her when he got the feeling that she needed him. “And I won’t you. Thanks Hale.”

Haley smiled at him and let him roll them over until he was on top. She caressed his head and ran her fingers through his hair. “It’ll be okay. And it really isn’t a big deal.”

“Maybe.” Dean thought about it for a moment and then a thought came to him. “At least Sam get more action. Maybe Angie being pregnant is a good thing besides the obvious.”

That earned him a smack and playful growl. He responded by growling back and pursued the game that he and Haley started.


	14. 11.14 Vessel for the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's hard finding out that Lucifer is riding Cas. But Amitiel is in the picture and she has some ideas about how to work this out but mostly be there as a friend for the Malachi... the earthbound angel. Tag to The Vessel.

_And you. You’re just like the big sister that ignores the little brother even though I’m way older than you._

Angela sat looking out at the water, watching the ripples. She felt the breeze ripple through her hair, teasing the loose locks. She focused on nothing in particular and was content to stare. It was the look that Sam pretty much hated but as she said, sometimes there wasn’t really a look that adequately explained how she felt and thought. After all she did learn a horrible truth and it ate at her.

It pretty much was an easy plan in terms of sending Dean to get the Hand of God, the potential weapon to use against Amara. Crazy yes since it involved time travel and the power of an angel but it was one of the few choices they had. True she could use Absolution since she hadn’t tried previous but… things had changed. She absently rubbed the swell of her abdomen.

_What really interests me is why you didn’t sense something was wrong in the first place._

Something was wrong. Angela knew that as she caressed her abdomen and thought about it. It wasn’t the first time that she hadn’t been able to sense her angel, her Castiel. It could be chalked up to that but… She had always been able to tell if something was or wasn’t her family. Hell she knew that siren wasn’t what her eyes were showing her and she really knew that it was those Leviathans that had impersonated Sam and Dean.

There were a lot of changes she had noticed since becoming pregnant and it bothered her to a degree apart from being near stressed out in fear of learning more about what Amara said she did. She had heard of women becoming more hormonal and such when being pregnant but the fact that things she took for granted weren’t working… it was adding to her stress and worry that she wouldn’t be able to do what she had to do and protect her family.

It really, _really_ bothered her that Castiel had said yes and taken Lucifer in and she couldn’t sense it. It also made her scared. So far she wasn’t showing enough and she wore Sam’s shirts to hide it but… It terrified her to think about what Lucifer would do if he found out that she was pregnant and with Sam’s baby no less. It was why she couldn’t really answer him when she barged in like she did.

“I have to ask why you think it wise to sit out here and in your condition,” a familiar voice sounded right next to her.

Angela didn’t flinched but turned to look at her visitor. “One thing hasn’t changed. I’m still a dhampir and don’t get cold easily.” She looked at the water and then asked, “Are you alright after what happened Amitiel?”

Amitiel stretched her arms slightly as she sat next to Angela. “I am fine. I pulled back and let you take over before the sigil was used. Then I left.”

“And scared them both in the process.” Angela looked at the Archangel of Truth. “You’re lucky that they didn’t decide to go angel hunting.”

“And I told you that it wouldn’t hurt the baby. I was one of two that placed protection on it.” Amitiel looked at Angela slightly exasperated like she couldn’t believe she was going to bring it up again.

“And Gadreel was the other.” Angela made a slight humming sound and her mouth twitched in the barest of smiles. She always knew the angel that misled her by calling himself Ezekiel was a good one despite what happened to him. And she long forgiven and thanked both angels for keeping the baby safe. Granted it was a long time to do so but she was glad of it. “And for that I am grateful to you both.”

Amitiel smiled gently, “He couldn’t let you die.”

Angela smiled at the archangel. “I always thought he was a good one.”

“And it’s what you’ve always done, Sister. Since the beginning.”

Angela sighed at that when she heard it. “So it is true.”

“It was hard keeping it from you every time we met. But I respect our Father’s wishes and what you asked for when it was done. All I could do was to help you when you needed it.”

“And people wonder why I say fuck you and help me at the same time to angels.” Angela couldn’t help but chuckle at that. It was an irony of sorts and in the end knowing the truth kind of explained why things happened the way they did. It was a sort of relief but not a complete one. It still had her apprehensive about things that have happened and what will happen.

“Well my brothers and sisters don’t quite understand and it took me centuries watching humans to understand,” Amitiel offered. She studied Angela as the woman continued to sit and stare at the water. She noticed a clam that was anything but what it was. “What has you so afraid, Sister?”

“Not sure you should be calling me that.”

Amitiel hummed at that, “More than ever. But seriously, what has you afraid?”

Angela looked at the archangel as she absently rubbed her abdomen. Her expression became pensive and sad as she thought about it. She looked back at the water and watched as the wind made ripples. Her eyes flickered slightly as she stared.

_The funny thing is… I don’t really need you anymore, Sam. You are deadweight. Her deadweight._

That was when Lucifer decided to kill Sam. At the time Angela had been in the kitchen since she had a craving for tea and a sip of the blood she kept in there. It made her nauseous at times thinking that she had cravings for it but it made her sick if she didn’t have a regimen of it like a once a week thing. It made the morning sickness like a tea party.

Then she felt a sharp white hot pain. It shot down her spine that no sound came out except a silent gasp. It felt like when she had been stabbed in the back and died the first time. She felt pain but it wasn’t her pain. It was Sam’s pain and it was then that she started to collapse in pain. She was feeling Sam’s pain and she felt paralyzed and numb about it. She couldn’t move even though her body was screaming to go and help Sam but also protect her baby.

_I’ll help you, sister. Just let me in._

Angela turned to look at Amitiel. She never liked possession. It was a bitch and she would know having had a couple of gods and at one point a demon riding her ass. And yet she allowed an angel in. And she had a front row seat when she confronted Lucifer.

_You always had to show your badass side. And to the wrong person._

“I’m afraid of something I don’t remember and that it will come after what I hold dear.” Angela looked at Amitiel. “What Lucifer tried to do to Sam…” She looked away for a moment before turning back. “You saved us. Bought Cas time to take control…”

“And Lucifer is still in him,” Amitiel replied sadly. She looked away and chewed her lower lip. “And all because he was afraid.” She looked at Angela with a firm look. “But you can do it.”

Angela was taken aback by that. “What?”

“Lucifer isn’t wrong you know,” Amitiel replied. She put a hand on Angela’s shoulder. “You can beat Amara, capture Darkness and defeat her.”

“Not you too.”

“Hear me out.” Amitiel put her other hand on Angela’s shoulder to look at her square in the eye. “It is true. You were created as an angel. You were the one created to be all that Father is. It was so much that you and your other half were the first of their kind.”

Angela sighed at that. She didn’t speak but her expression became pensive. She long knew that she was to be a defender of mortals and she fought against it. This she fought against but not as hard. A small part of her entertained the notion that it was true even though she didn’t want it to be. She was tired; tired of things happening and taking away the happiness she found.

Amitiel knew that the dhampir was not happy to hear her words. In truth, she didn’t want to drop this on her. She wished it were anyone else. But she knew that Angela wouldn’t be able to live with herself unless she had done something. She continued, “It is true. You know me and what I am.”

“Truth.”

“And what I say is the truth. The Scribe knows it too.” Amitiel paused and then continued, “I know it is not fair and I don’t wish it upon you but in all honesty, you are the one to best Amara.”

“I don’t remember and as far as I can tell it’s an elaborate plot to get me to be heaven’s bitch again.”

“And I don’t blame you. The moment I learned about the child, I wanted to shield you from everything. But I know you. You would have protested it.”

Angela couldn’t help but smirk at that. “You know me well. As much as Sam knows me.”

“Well…”

“Don’t,” Angela warned with a slight smile. “I tolerate being called the earthbound angel but I am not that.” She put her hands on her lap and looked at them clasped. Sighing she asked, “You really think that I can do this?”

“From what I know and what you have done,” Amitiel affirmed.

“Can’t just pull out a good old fashioned yes or no can’t you?”

“Alright,” Amitiel replied with a chuckle, “Yes. And you are not alone.” She cleared her throat and added, “Your old army is mustering. The Army of the Light.”

“Tell me about it.” Angela looked up at the night sky. “Kesset has a way with things.”

“We follow because you are a leader at heart. And we believe. Sometimes all you need is faith.”

Angela sighed at that. She felt that her own words were being used against her. She really couldn’t see how this was going to work since she was pregnant and she suspected there would be fighting involved. True she could fight up until she had to slow down and give birth but… She didn’t want to let anyone know but the worrying and everything else… she was getting exhausted. She felt that if she were completely human, she would be in a worse off state. “And further down the road?”

Amitiel looked at Angela. She knew the apprehensions. Gently she put a hand to the swell and looked Angela in the eye and replied, “Have faith. There are three great things. And I will keep my promise.”

Angela looked at the angel and raised her brow at that declaration. “You’ve done enough.”

“Not really. I’ll help you.” Amitiel sat up and paused a moment since she was going to suggest something that was probably going to be met with resistance. “I’ll help you remember if you want and you’ll need to develop your abilities even more so.” She stopped talking and stared at Angela in the eye.

Angela didn’t like what was being suggested and yet… She didn’t like where this was going but in the end it was going to come down to one thing and that was meeting Amara on the battlefield. She looked out over the water and thought about things. Mostly she thought about how it would affect her family and that one still needed to be saved. She pressed her tongue on the back of her teeth as if to decide what to say when she felt it.

Pressing her hand to her abdomen, she felt it again and looked down at the swell. She stared at it for a moment to think before looking up and looked at Amitiel in the eye and gave a nod.

Amitiel nodded in reply and turned to look out at the water. The archangel knew that it was going to be a difficult battle. That the earthbound angel could do it she didn’t doubt it. There was never any doubt. But she knew that it would be hard on her and the Winchesters. She didn’t have to ask since she knew that both brothers were dealing with what had happened and what to do. And if she did, they would tell her the truth. For now though, the road was going to be long and difficult especially with the current situation. She would be there and be the vessel for the light.


	15. 11.15 Beyond the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crowley needed help to escape being Lucifer's dog and got it from an unlikely source. Angela gives him help and ends up with the burnt out Rod of Aaron. Tag to Beyond the Mat.

“That actually worked out better than I thought.”

Angela stood there in warehouse, holding the Rod of Aaron, rather leaning on it. She stared at Crowley with a raised brow and looked completely annoyed. The usual look as far as anything involving Crowley went.

Crowley noted the look and said, “What?”

Angela blinked at him as she replied, “I am less than amused at the fact that you asked me to help you.”

“The most I expected was a slap to the face. You have a bad habit of do… HEY!” Crowley backed up when she stepped towards him with her hand raised. She was still holding onto the rod and looked the picture of a sorceress or something. “Very bad habit,” he said as he dusted his coat off, “Even if I do enjoy it.”

Angela narrowed her eyes at the demon. She had been contacted through her dreams by the demon and learned that Lucifer had taken over hell. She didn’t believe him at first and brushed him off. It wasn’t until it was confirmed that Lucifer was possessing Castiel that she relented a little about his pleas.

She was amused that Lucifer made him his bitch and always teased him about it when she got a chance. Of course it annoyed Crowley and that was a plus in her book, but eventually he told her about what Lucifer was looking for. She didn’t let on that she knew about it, but let Crowley talk. Eventually, he came up with a plan of escape.

It was probably foolish to agree to help since she was starting to show and the last thing she wanted was to let Crowley know that she was pregnant. Yet it was a chance to get her hands on a Hand of God item. She had always believed in stacking her hand when it came to taking on an adversary that she wasn’t familiar with. She thought with her tactician’s mind.

The plan called for Crowley to get free and lead the way to where he stashed the rod. Of course, he had a few plans that he had in place. It was on her level of planning for every possible angle, even the diabolical. It had her reluctant to admit that demon had a pretty good head when it came to tactics. Not that she would ever tell him out loud. That would just inflate his already overinflated ego and she couldn’t have that.

She hated hiding things from Sam, but after the thing with Castiel and Lucifer, he became more overprotective. He was still shaken at the fact that she said yes to an angel and she was pregnant. She suspected that he was scared of what he had seen. He didn’t voice it, but she sensed it and it hurt that she had scared him that badly.

Looking at Crowley, holding onto the rod, she said, “Just because I helped you in this little plan doesn’t mean that we are friends or anything.”

“True, but we are… colleagues,” Crowley replied after he rolled his eyes in thoughts. “After all _you_ were the one that came to me.”

“And to my regret.”

“Now is that any way to treat someone who taught you more about deception?”

“As if I needed such,” she replied with a snort.

“Considering all the other times…” Crowley stopped when he saw the narrowed eyes. He held his hands up in surrender, “Alright. So… what are you going to now? That’s a worthless piece of wood now.” He pointed at the rod.

Angela grinned at the demon as she shifted on her feet. She held the staff and said in a singsong tone, “This rod?” She twirled it and gave a good clout to Crowley’s hand. It gave a nice sting.

Crowley stepped back, “Bloody hell.” He held his hand and saw the red welt. It was the same as being hit with an iron bar. He looked at it and then glared at Angela.

Angela held the rod like she would a staff. She looked at Crowley, “This Hand of God may have lost its power, but anyone who knows a thing or two of magic and especially things blessed by a deity would know that its power is not truly gone. It still produces a sting.”

Crowley stared at her. He gave a slight nod, “Well… it’s clear that you know how to use that thing.”

“You got what you wanted, Crowley. Your freedom.” Angela stood the rod beside her. “You should go.”

“Don’t tell me you’re not upset that I used the rod’s power?” Crowley looked at her with an incredulous look.

Angela grinned and gave a slight chuckle. She shook her head, “Not really.”

“Then why the bloody hell did you help me if it wasn’t for the rod?”

Angela smiled at Crowley. “I just couldn’t let you rot as Lucifer’s bitch.”

Crowley stared at Angela. Even after all these years, he still didn’t understand her as well as he would like to. His expression was one that was scrutinizing but it hid his surprise and other thoughts well. He gave her a narrow look, “You felt bloody sorry for me?”

“Well I wouldn’t go that far,” Angela reply after thinking about it some. She gave a playful grin, “It’s more like an asset, a valuable asset that I would hate to lose.” She looked at Crowley as if to tell him to challenge her assessment.

Crowley raised his brow at her, “I may have done a disservice to you, teaching you that.” He gave a pouting nod, “So, I guess you’re going to take it with you. Well, my job here is done. Good luck telling the moose what you’ve been up to.”

Angela blinked, not saying anything as Crowley left. When he was gone, she took the breath she had been holding and sagged onto the rod. She was caught by a pair of arms and sighed in relief as one of her hands went to her abdomen.

“You do too much in your condition.”

Angela chuckled as she braced herself, “I’m not fragile like the humans you protect Alucard.” She straightened up and turned to look at the old friend that brought back one of the few good memories within the last few years or so. “Just pregnant.”

Alucard gave a grunt, “Everyone has a vulnerability _mon ange_. Including my kind.”

“Ever still the protector. So much like my Sam,” Angela replied with a smile.

Alucard gave a wry smile, “And how he manages to keep an eye on you, I’ll never figure out.” He looked out the window. “Come, we must return to your home before sunrise.”

Angela nodded as she clutched the rod to her body. She allowed Alucard to pick her up and carry her out. It wasn’t the same as being carried by Sam. She sighed as she thought about him and everything that had happened.

“What has you so sad _mon ange_?”

“Just everything.”

Alucard gave a humming sound. He knew that she would tell him when she was ready. He did know that she needed a way to get there. “I am surprised that you asked me for help with this. I would have thought that you would have asked your guardian.”

“He’s… too honest.”

“This is something you don’t want Sam to know.”

Angela cuddled into Alucard’s chest. She shook her head. “No. He’s already scared after what happened. After I let an angel in and…” She sighed, “And I may have lost a friend, a brother.”

Alucard listened as he took off from the ground. He would be able to cover the distance before sunrise. “And you are afraid of what he will say if you told him about helping the demon.” He stated it more than asked.

“It has always been hard for him to understand why I have done things the way I have. Demon stoolies, coming close to the lines with regards to magic,” Angela admitted, “We never really talked about it, even though Sam he says he understands.”

“And you think he doesn’t?”

“He does, but it’s a struggle,” Angela admitted. She looked out at the land below. She looked at the rod in her hands. “I doubt he’d completely understand why I risked showing myself even dressed in his clothes.”

“I don’t understand why you still want it even though the power was expended.” Alucard peered at it curiously. He gave a slight frown.

“A Hand of God may have power to be used once, but something that had been gifted to the humans to protect this world… it’s still pretty active.” Angela gave a slight grin, “I still have a knack for finding objects of power.”

“That you do,” Alucard agreed. He looked at the rod and at Angela. She was getting drowsy now. “I do think though that Sam would understand.”

Angela didn’t speak. She just looked at the landscape and the ground below. Sam would understand and even be pissed that she went out like she did. But he would understand. Just as she understood him and Dean and why they went to see that wrestler.


	16. 11.16 Light of the Soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the road so far, Sam thinks about his life and the one woman that stood by him no matter what. Tag to Safe House.

Sam knew what he was getting into the moment he decided to pursue a relationship with her. He knew that it would be a road of trial and tribulation, joy and tears, happiness and heartache; he knew this and he continued to go out with her. She did things that would have constituted deliberate wrecking but he understood it. He understood her. And he kept at it and eventually married her. She was his life. Except when she was being her stubborn self.

She was always stubborn and it seemed to have increased since becoming pregnant. Sam suspected that it had more to do with her hiding that she was scared; she was scared of the fact that she had a previous life that was virtually nonexistent and with a being that was virtually unknown and that she had a history with. He saw it as a means of trying to carry on like normal but it was taking a toll on her. That and the fact that Castiel had said yes to Lucifer… it had him worried for her and the baby. And she was stubborn.

She had insisted on coming with them and in the end he and Dean thought it was for the best. Sam knew he was not invincible and couldn’t claim that he could protect her from everything but he could do something to give her peace of mind. He could do that and he and his brother would do their damnedest to keep her and the life growing inside of her safe. So they took her on the road with them and tried to help in coming up with a plan against Amara and to save Castiel. And he just had to find that job.

In Sam’s mind, and hers too, just because you had something major in front of you, it doesn’t mean that you ignore the little things that come your way. There were people to save, a kid to save from something that happened in that house. And given that Dean could never boss her anyway and he knew she was right… it became a moot point.

As it turned out, they found that Bobby and Rufus had worked a case in that house some years before. True they learned it the old fashioned way but it kind of helped when she used her mojo and sensed the older hunters’ presence. And the game changed when they first decided that it was a ghost haunting the place.

Sam, having known and lived with his wife, could say he had a pretty good grasp of the situation and knew when to push and when to pull. He had been told he was an alpha in the sense that he could exert some authority and had shown it. This time he put his foot down and said that she wasn’t going to the graveyard. He learned later that she was humoring him since she stayed out front of the house and stared at it. He should have listened when she said there was something off about it and that it wasn’t a spirit or poltergeist.

Through research they learned that it was a soul eater. It put her in a thoughtful mood as he read out loud to her and Dean about soul eaters. He knew her well enough to know she was thinking of something. It certainly showed when she opened the book from the Men of Letters and showed them the sigil and what was involved. It wasn’t a surprise since she had been friends with the Men of Letters and she had a whole section of the library devoted to her. It did have Sam wonder if it was the same with the Illuminati though he had no wish to see those assholes again.

The plan was to have someone go into the nest and draw their sigil while the other stayed in their world to draw the other half. It was unanimous between him and Dean that she would not be in that house while they did this. The obvious was because she was pregnant in her second trimester and basically it was male instinct to protect. Sam quietly told her to wait in the car while they did that and did what Dean called going alpha on her ass. She put up a mild fight but agreed and left them to do the job but it didn’t go quite a smoothly as they like. Nothing ever did being a Winchester.

The soul eater possessing Dean was unexpected and brought back painful memories of when his brother was a demon and hunting him in the bunker. Sam knew though that it wasn’t Dean doing the action and took comfort in that as he defended himself. He almost bought it when his possessed brother knocked him a good one and was going to bash his head. The blow never came but a thump and a grunt did.

She had listened for the most part but she was not one to stand by and do nothing if she sensed trouble. Sam was stunned when he saw her there in the room. Her eyes were flickering and her focus was on his possessed brother and she had him pinned to the wall. It allowed Sam to finish the sigil but not before he heard what the soul eater had to say.

_What are you? You are not like them._

It was nothing new when a thing they were hunting noticed her. And it had nothing to do with her looks. It was another thing that had Sam constantly on the worry since she was not like other dhampirs and he had witnessed it over the years. The question that was often asked was who didn’t know her.

_You, your soul… tarnished and beautiful… but part of a whole._

The soul eater had rambled while she kept it pinned. It allowed Sam to finish the sigil but he heard everything. It had been scary learning about their souls and it offered an explanation for some of the things that had been more like flukes from when they first met and it still was mostly because it was the kind of thing that appealed to the things that they hunted. It was also not so bad in that he always was in tuned with her and she to him and he was still paying for that no matter what she said. He could be allowed that bit of punishment so to speak.

_You are a creature of comfort but your purpose had been twisted long ago._

_I can protect you all. I know you crave that for that little life within. It’s the only reason I haven’t come for you. But it is delicious…_

It was a threat… at least Sam chose to take it that way. It was his wife and child on the line and it wasn’t like she could hide it unless she was swimming in one of his shirts. Even when she was wearing one of his flannel shirts, he could see the swell of her abdomen. It was why they didn’t really let her do the legwork in hunting and she agreed to it since she was that scared and putting up a good show of bravado. He gave a punch to his brother and regretted it since it was wearing his brother’s face and went back to finishing the sigil.

_You really think you can beat me and stand against Darkness…_

_Nothing can stand against Darkness… except maybe Light._

Sam managed to finish the sigil and the soul eater was destroyed. He knew his brother was going to be okay but when he turned towards his wife, he almost went into panic. She was still standing there and her eyes were flickering but she wasn’t looking at anything in the room. He had seen enough to know that she was spacing out or probably talking to one of the gods that like to do that. He had been distracted when Dean struggled and gasped a bit when he came back from the nest but he didn’t need to worry since she came back and just stood there like a benevolent spirit or something as she looked down at them with her gaze focused on Dean.

No one really wanted to think about the physics of the nest but she did say that it was kind of like when they went to the convention. She didn’t need to go into details about what she meant he and Dean both remembered that and his brother being himself had to ask if it was possible that they could have seen Bobby as he saw them. It hurt Sam’s head to think about it and clearly it was something that she was willing to leave as a question of faith.

It wasn’t until later when they found a place to stay for the night since all-nighters were not necessarily good for her condition that he asked her why she chose to leave the car. Her response was typical in that she sensed they were in trouble but knowing her, there was usually a little more to it. He just preferred not to get into a fight and eventually she did explain things and above all, he trusted her and her judgment. She eventually said that she had been drawn to the house and the soul eater. The how and why she couldn’t explain except for the source of her healer abilities and her connection to the spirit world. Even Sam could see that it was still bothering her that she could do that; she never really liked being the one outside the box. Sure she made do with it and channeled it into something good but she seemed that at times she wasn’t comfortable with her own skin even after all these years and it increased a little lately for obvious reasons.

In the end, Sam suggested that maybe what Amitiel helped her with and because of what they knew… it came out like a mess but she picked up on his logic. It earned him a smile and gentle raking of his hair through her fingers and a comment that he was sweet. It really was the kind of thing to dampen a man’s ego but Sam learned it was her way of saying thank you since the words to her seemed inadequate. As much as the whole business worried him, he was a bit relieved that her abilities worked this time. The fluctuation in her ability to control what she always had was more worrisome than troublesome.

He was relieved that she hadn’t overdone it in a fit of rage because he or Dean was hurt like a scratch or was seriously hurt to near death. Those reminded him too closely when she went on a rampage under the influence of her Purgatory problem and tore a few demons a new one and actually fought with his brother. He hadn’t witnessed it since his being seriously injured was the cause of it but it had him feeling guilty that just by loving her and being the one she loved was the cause of something that could turn her into the thing she feared and hated. He knew he would never forgive himself for that if it came down to it and he couldn’t kill her; he would be able to. He would just stand there and let her kill him like he was willing to do when Dean raised that scythe at him.

Sam knew that his life would never be what he wanted all those years ago when he left for Stanford. He would never really have a ‘safe’ life, free from the things that people thought were make believe. True he used to think that and that by walking away from it he would be normal but even that wasn’t possible. He couldn’t ignore what happened when the string of serial rapes on campus occurred and then suddenly vanished nor could he help but research when the grisly murders near the campus popped up and then they disappeared. He didn’t get involved but he was prepared to until they stopped. He knew now that it was her and she admitted that she watched over him while adding that she was on a job offered by an old friend in the philosophy department tutoring philosophy and teaching history.

Then Dean walked back into his life and he picked up and followed. Then what happened, happened and then he met her. He knew what he was getting into when he started down the path of first building a friendship and then building something more with her. Sometimes it seemed he got the short end of the stick with her mannerisms but… in the end he could say now that he had been attracted to her, maybe not in the way his brother would prefer but he was. He was gentle and persistent as she said and always like it was a good thing.

Yeah, maybe their lives were messed up that they’d find seeing visions of each other dead comforting but, if they hadn’t made the choices they did… then they probably wouldn’t have those times that were good. Sam knew that if she hadn’t come back to stay after Wyoming, he would never have gotten to this point with her and maybe things would have turned out a bit differently. For all he knew, things could have gone worse in terms of the Apocalypse, Leviathans, angels, and everything.

Sam was drawn out of his thoughts to find his wife sleeping and looking like she might be miserable about it before her features relaxed as she settled on her side. He couldn’t help but smile and was grateful that he could be here and now with her. Crawling into his place beside her, he pulled her towards him and wrapped his arm around her. Gently touching her abdomen he felt a rather gentle kick and chuckled when she muttered one of Bobby’s choice phrases in her sleep. Yeah he knew what he was getting into when he decided to pursue this road towards a relationship with her. But he wouldn’t trade it for the world considering that it was going to lead to the greatest gift he would ever receive. He gently nuzzled her neck and drifted off to sleep. He didn’t regret a thing.


	17. 11.17 Light of Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean knows what's at stake in terms of finding a way to save Cas and gank Amara but takes a step backwards after nearly losing Sam and what the consequences could have been. Tag to Red Meat.

The first time I heard me and Sam were overly codependent, I thought it was the usual psychology crap. Me and Sam are brothers. We watch each other’s backs and that’s the way of it though my job is a bit harder since it’s kind of hardwired into me and it’s the number one rule: I look out for Sam. And that’s been modified to include my girl and sister-in-law and partner in crime, Angie.

We’ve been together for so long that I find it difficult to contemplate life without either of them. The times we’ve almost died and died and then brought back… that pain of loss even for a moment… I don’t know how I’d be able to go on. That’s how I felt when I saw Sam dead on the floor of that cabin, looking at the blood that was coming from his gut. I didn’t want to leave him behind but there were civilians to worry about but I was also worried about Angie.

I knew Angie would have sensed Sam hurt and dying. Being knocked up or not, she was and is always able to tell when Sam is in trouble and she came charging in vamped out. She was on my mind when I looked at Sam’s still body. She would be worried sick and I would have to tell her that Sam would never get to see his kid being born. That or she’d leave the place where we or rather Sam told her to stay put and bring Gideon and Shadow with her and it wouldn’t be a pretty picture. I knew better that it would be the latter first and then the former afterwards. That’s how it was and it had me scared.

I’ll admit when Angie told me that she was pregnant, I freaked. I freaked and it wasn’t my kid. It scared me not because of the whole vamp thing; that is moot between us. It scared me because we have Amara to deal with and then adding the fact that Cas had to let Lucifer in… I mean I know firsthand what it’s like to have a target on your back and she was right there with me through the whole damned Apocalypse thing. So yeah I was damned scared and Sam was too. And it didn’t help when her powers went a little crazy when the hormones kicked in but they did help in a pinch just… I didn’t want it to come to this.

It was bad timing that I got zapped by that cop since I wanted to get back to Sam and bring him home to her. At the time I didn’t realize that she had already set out with the dogs. Boy can that girl move. Being pregnant didn’t slow her down and later Sam told me that she went worse than the Vengeful Virago. Actually he told me one word and that made it clear to me. It had me right back to when I was actually sent inside her head to help her put herself back together and fix the problem she had been battling from Purgatory.

It made me more determined to talk to the reaper Billy to get Sam back. It wasn’t for me but for her. As much as I admit that I can’t live without my brother, truth is… I can’t live without the both of them. And I couldn’t bear the thought that Sam’s kid would have to grow up without a father. I was ready to step up and be like a father figure but it wouldn’t be the same. And I knew deep down that Angie would be broken. Oh she would keep going because it was her kid but she would have that void and in the end… I had to try.

It stung when the reaper said that she was going to reap us for good. I so badly wanted her to know about Angie being pregnant. It wasn’t too far a stretch to assume that Billy would know about Sam and Angie and the soul thing and I even had the faintest of hope that she knew they were once angels. That still gets me every time I think about it. The idea that my brother was an angel before Amara killed him… At least Sam wasn’t dead but that didn’t mean things were all right with Angie. And Billy said no to bringing Sam back and she didn’t even believe me when I sort of implied Angie’s condition. I was desperate.

I was relieved Sam was alive but there was still one more werewolf to deal with and when I found out what he did to Sam… I get why he did what he did. It’s a survival thing and looking after the people that mattered. That still didn’t make it right and I know that it didn’t with Angie but she is much more magnanimous than me. Yes, I used a big word but it fits. Sue me.

When I found out that Angie tracked Sam to a way station store and helped kill the last two werewolves, I couldn’t help but cheer. She is my tough girl and I figured she was the kind that would hunt up until she had to go on maternity leave. I was also worried since a misplaced weapon or punch and it could spell trouble meaning the worst case scenario aka losing the baby. I get how Sam felt and why he was so reluctant to call her.

I have to admit that the whole true soul bond/mate thing they have has come in handy. It is also annoying since she and Sam do that talking without talking thing. Of course she says it’s not that much different when me and Sam do it but at least it’s easy to see. So there is a difference Angie. I say it’s handy because Sam can warn her if we run into problems on a hunt. This time though he refused to call for her even though she had the healing mojo and the don’t mess with me attitude. I can’t help but get the feeling that if he had called for her, then Sam wouldn’t have been sent into shock and she would have healed him. Then again… maybe it worked out better this way since Sam didn’t die when that asshat choked him and we got him.

You could think that it was perfectly planned when Sam arrived as he did with Angie by his side and Shadow and Gideon charging in. It wasn’t really but it was a relief to see Sam with my own eyes alive and breathing. He was still bleeding from his stomach and that was bad; I could tell since he was using his wife as support. It’s the kind of thing I would tease my brother with. Of course I’ll be nice and not tease him since I did the stupid thing and killed myself.

I’ll admit that the codependent thing is psycho babble but… there is some truth to it. I can’t live without my brother with me. I don’t want to and I’m scared to even try. And it would be worse if I didn’t have Angie in my life and I’ll extend it to my Hale. They are all I have left and… it scares me to death. But I guess what scares me more and I’m happy for is that we are going to have a new member to our family.

I still feel guilt that I led Ellen and Jo to their deaths and what I did to Sam with Amy and other things and I still feel shitty about how I treated Angie over the years. The things I said… and she still forgives me at every turn. She even forgave me with lying to Sam and making her lie to Sam when I tricked him into saying yes to an angel. She forgave and still tried to help me with the Mark of Cain.

Sam was right in that she is a good person. She is generous with herself by helping people and willingness to give them a second chance. Even when she was neck deep in her Purgatory problem she still was helping people despite what it was doing to her. She keeps fighting no matter what and I see that as I watch her walking through the halls of the bunker and not in her usual stealing of Sam’s clothes. It’s a surprise to me since she has always tried to hide her baby bump and I get why.

I am happy for them. Truly. And I want to do what I can to make sure that the baby, boy or girl, is born and will be kept safe. There are a lot of things out there that would love to hurt us and they would do it by using the baby. I know Sam and Angie know that. I know that but… that kid is family and family is important to me. And to be honest… if anyone deserves this happiness it’s my brother and my girl. I won’t let Amara hurt Angie despite the fact that they know each other from the time the world began and I don’t care that Angie doesn’t remember that life. I’ll do what I have to even though… I can’t raise a hand to her. I can’t kill Amara.

I don’t know if Angie knows that but it wouldn’t surprise me. And I know at some point I’m going to have to ask her for help. The same might be for Cas. I don’t want to. Rather I want to try and find a way to do it myself. I’ve seen my brother and my girl struggle and I want to do this for them. I know I probably have a snowball’s chance in hell to do it but… I have hope. That life growing inside of Angie… it gives me some measure of hope that I might be able to fix things and give the kid a life that is ten times better than mine. I can do that. For family.


	18. 11.18 Light of Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are back at square one of trying to figure out how to help Cas and defeat Amara. Sam has a couple of ideas and does a little midnight oil burning in the company of Sherlock the librarian and ends up learning a little more about the one person who has stood beside him no matter what. Tag to Hell's Angel.

Sam sighed wearily as he walked through the bunker towards the library. It had been a long day with trying to play nice with Crowley and Rowena in order to save Castiel and get a way to stop Amara. And to top it off, she had been there and now Crowley and Rowena knew about her and Lucifer and Amara knew about her. People he didn’t want to know knew that she was pregnant.

He probably could have been much firmer and told her to stay at the bunker rather than come with but he knew that she would have just followed them and probably undermine what they were doing and do things her own way. In the end he and Dean agreed that it was better she come with and then be able to help as much as she could. He didn’t like it but it was better than other alternatives since she started wearing clothes that were more maternity like.

Sighing Sam ran his fingers along the titles of the tomes preparing to do what he usually did when he was kept up and that was research. He did agree with Dean that they had to save Castiel from Lucifer. The ward and Crowley and her going in didn’t work so they had to find another way. And he wasn’t looking forward to a showdown especially if they took what Amara implied her seriously… which he did.

“Burning midnight oil, Nanny?”

Sam sighed and rolled his eyes. “Not that it’s any of your business, Sherlock, but yeah.”

Sherlock Holmes studied the younger Winchester, noting the rigid posture and the tense shoulders. There seemed to be a lot of that these days. Of course he knew one source since it wasn’t that hard to tell and had marveled that both Winchesters couldn’t see it then until it was spelled out to them. The other parts varied. “Considering that I maintain this pitiful excuse for a library I’d say it is. You didn’t put the tome on heavenly aspects back in its proper place.”

Sam turned and shot a glare at the Librarian. “I did.”

“Then explain why I found it in section M?”

Sam growled at that figuring the librarian was doing it on purpose again. They had never really clicked into getting along. At least not the polite kind of getting along. From the time they met, Sherlock had snubbed all three of them with various forms of name calling and insults and questions that poked at raw subjects. Sure Sam got a laugh at the different descriptions to Dean’s libido but he rankled at being called Nanny and a few other choice conversations plus it seemed that Sherlock lorded the fact that he had to ask him for help regarding the Purgatory problem over him. He straightened up and saw that Librarian looking ready to burn midnight oil himself and holding the book being mentioned out at him. He turned back and went looking.

“You’re not going to find much there.”

“Fine,” Sam growled more in annoyance. “Why don’t you tell me then?”

Sherlock tossed the tome he was holding at Sam. “You’re onto something here and I found it in section M.”

They both knew that Sherlock wasn’t going to give the full story and he did like to play games with them. Angela said he took to heart that knowledge is worth more when it was earned. Sam held the book after awkwardly catching it, surprised that Sherlock would be throwing it at him. “That the hell Sherlock? You know that this is not like other books.”

“It’s hardy. Believe me, Thomas one of the stationed Men of Letters here knew his stuff about preservation,” Sherlock replied as he looked around the library. He looked back at Sam, “It’s a lot tougher than you think, Nanny.”

“Stop calling me that.”

“I will when it stops being so.”

Sam gritted his teeth and glared hard at the librarian who was staring at him with an impassive face. He knew _that_ was a futile battle and why he was called that. He threw the book back at Sherlock and said, “Go away.”

Sherlock caught the book and threw it right back. “I don’t think so. You are onto something or trying to understand something and it’s in there.”

Sam looked ready to punch the librarian in the face but was too tired to do so. And he wasn’t about to start something that would stress out Angela. She had enough of that today. He would have said something when Samadean, the Xana, came out and held up his hands, “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Sam, please don’t throw that again. And Sherlock…”

“Oh the cute invisible teddy bear,” the librarian deadpanned.

The Xana ignored the snide comment and stood his ground. “We really shouldn’t be fighting.”

“Oh stuff it,” Sherlock retorted. He walked behind some stacks and came out carrying two other books. He tossed them one at a time at Sam and smirked as he managed to catch them albeit awkwardly and didn’t drop one. “Nanny here is onto something or has an idea and I am certain he hasn’t mentioned it to the Licentious One. And it has to do with a certain annoying wench with a penchant for being annoyingly right and full of hope.”

“Hey,” Sam barked.

Sherlock looked at Sam and rolled his eyes. “Please. That is mild and it’s not like I really insulted her. She would let me know.”

“Come on you two,” Samadean piped up. It was hard since he was ridiculously short but he could make his point. “Sherlock, you figured out something and Sam is onto something. Just work together.”

“Like the Nanny would ever ask for help.”

“I did,” Sam gritted out. “I asked you for help when I saw what was happening to Angie after she got back from Purgatory. I _asked_.”

Sherlock looked at Sam. He did and he did his best with the boundaries Sam had set. It was frustrating but he had to give it to the man for being firm in his decisions. “And we resolved that issue yes. Which is why I am asking: why do you keep leaving relevant material in section M?”

“Because of what Amara said to Angie about knowing her.”

“You really think that Sam?” Samadean looked at the hunter. “You really think that Angie was what they say?”

Sam looked at the Xana and then the librarian. “I’m not discounting it,” he said. He walked away carrying the books that Sherlock threw at him and went to one of the tables. He thumped them on the table and started opening them to where he last was reading.

He had been cross checking specific references that sounded like something Angela would do. That and given what he had seen that he could no longer say were flukes or one time deals… He didn’t have trouble believing that. That and he knew reincarnation and old souls were actually pretty real. He just wanted to come up with something or find something that could help as long as it didn’t come at the expense of Angela or the baby. Already she was feeling hurt that Castiel seemed to have given up and was completely under Lucifer’s thumb but hopeful. He managed to give a slight smile to Samadean when the Xana joined him and pulled a book towards him.

He was at reading and making notes for at least an hour when he heard feet shuffling in. He figured it was his brother coming to tell him to put the books down for the night and was prepared to tell him to shove it. He was tired but… he didn’t want to disturb her.

“I have heard that in times of duress a possessed being can be snapped out of it and they take back control.”

Sam stifled a groan and murmured, “No shit Sherlock. I did that and with Lucifer.”

“And have you considered it? With you or Dean of course since you are Castiel’s friend,” Sherlock replied as he stood by Sam’s chair holding another book. “After all you and your brother have managed things that others with the same professed bond couldn’t. And there are things she couldn’t have done if you weren’t there.” Sherlock paused when Sam looked at him and then shrugged. “Just observations.”

Sam looked at the librarian with a raised brow. “She’s been doing this since before she met us,” he pointed out.

“True but,” Sherlock turned a page of the book he was reading. He put his book down and pulled another and flipped the pages so they were side by side. “The last time B.W. was vastly different than A.W.”

Sam followed Sherlock’s finger, ignoring the fact that the librarian calculated time before and after meeting him and Dean for Angela. Still the librarian made a point and he read them side by side. He was quiet as he read it as he ran his fingers down the lines. It was more telling to him than what she had told him over the years and he could understand why. He looked at Sherlock and asked, “How is it possible to get this?”

“Apart from observation, how else would the Men of Letters learn about it?”

Sam knew the answer before he asked the question. He just had to hear it. He looked back at the manuscript obviously recorded by someone and it was excruciating detail. Sam swallowed slightly looking at the two accounts. The more recent was observed but the other… it was a personal account that was recounted and to another person. The who didn’t matter but… Sam looked away feeling like an ass. Now he knew why she only gave what she did and didn’t like to talk about it over much. It made the things Dean alluded to and what he had done topside recently seem like a picnic in comparison.

“That is only what one does for survival but it is nothing compared to what it means to fight for something worth fighting for,” Sherlock said in an almost sage-like manner.

Sam glanced at the observed account which skipped through several incidents. Some he recalled clearly and others he couldn’t because he had been incapacitated at the time. It was different and he had firsthand experience recently. “I know and… I feel guilty for tearing her away from what she has always done and that was help others first. What she does and what me and Dean have always done was think of each other first and then others. I did that.”

Sherlock stared at Sam for a moment before reaching over and giving a head slap to the back of the younger Winchester’s head. It earned a choice cuss word from Sam and a reprimand from Samadean. He ignored them both and said, “That is the stupidest thing I ever heard from you yet Nanny.”

“Well it’s true you fucking librarian,” Sam spat back with a heated glare. He wasn’t overly concerned that he would wake Dean and he knew his wife would be dead to the world since the confrontation with Lucifer and stare off with Amara exhausted her though she would refuse to admit it. “Before meeting me she was the most unselfish person I have met and because of me…”

“Don’t be stupid, Nanny,” Sherlock interrupted. He thumped the book he had been holding on the table. He pointed at it and continued, “She’ll always think of others before herself. You of all people should know that.” He turned away and walked back to his domain, “Why do I even bother.”

Sam pursed his lips ready for a few choice words when he was interrupted by Samadean, “What he means is that… well Angie never stopped being who she is. If anything more people have been saved. And mostly because you and Dean have stuck beside her especially when she needed it the most.” He jumped down and started walking towards the library. He paused a moment and turned to look at Sam and said, “And you said it yourself that it wasn’t wrong to think about the self. She did willingly jump into hell for you.”

“And I would do the same for her,” Sam replied with a sad smile. “Same vicious circle, Samadean. It’s why we are saving everyone.”

The Xana didn’t say anything but left Sam to his readings. His research was trying to find a means of defeating Amara. He knew what Sherlock had been poking at and one of the ideas floating around was the fact that in her previous life she did defeat the darkness. It wasn’t that he wanted her to do it but hopefully he would find something and they could replicate it and without unnecessary risk to her, the baby and other people. He looked at the book Sherlock dropped.

Sam knew that Angela could do a lot of things. To see it in print and from various people was a different story. He knew she always said that she didn’t know who it was they were talking about and that she never met that person. He always assumed it was because she didn’t see herself as others did. Now he was seeing that she could. She just didn’t want to acknowledge it. And it wasn’t a humbling of oneself. It was self-loathing.

As he looked at the books he pulled, he thought about what Sherlock said. As much as he despised the librarian, he knew that the man had a point and was good at what he did. He did help him and determined what they needed to do to help her with her Purgatory problem. As much as he didn’t want to, he was going to have to make nice with Sherlock and there was no better time than to do it now. He started to get up when he almost ran into his wife and ended up jumping back at the sudden appearance.

“Please don’t tell me you jump at me getting too close.”

Sam made a face but it turned into a smile as he eyed the tired grin his wife was giving him. “I just didn’t expect to see you there.” He paused to move a stray lock and mostly to touch her. “What are you doing up?”

Angela shrugged like she didn’t know. “Couldn’t sleep,” she offered with a smile. “You?”

“Late night reading,” Sam offered right off the bat. He wasn’t going to lie to her since she could see what he had out but he would tell her if she asked. “Usual.”

Angela hummed at that and nodded. She shifted to look at what was on the table. Sam watched as she studied the books. It was obvious what they were and he wasn’t going to hide it. He watched as she read the one that chronicled her account in hell, when she was a prisoner. He silently swallowed as she looked at it with that same look she got when researching for a job. Finally he said, “Angie… I…”

“I remember when I recounted this,” she interrupted as she tapped the page. “And it was at a time that when the memories were worse than nightmares.”

“I’m sorry. I was just…”

“Not everything is in there.”

Sam looked at her and then the book while frowning. She didn’t seemed distressed or anything. “What do you mean?”

“What it means. Not everything is in here.”

Sam wasn’t sure where this was going and the question was on the tip of his tongue. But he didn’t want to ask. He stood there watching her run her fingers on the page, her lips spelling out the words on the page. Finally she said, “It was a battle for survival. Being tortured, made to do the things I did. I held out as long as I could.”

“Angie, you don’t…”

“It was a group of souls fresh into the pit. The product of crossroad deals. The leader was young, in his twenties but already wise with the world.” Angela stared at the page fingering it. “He knew that he deserved hell for what he had done. So did the others. They were the ones that kept me alive at the worst of it.” She smiled slightly as she continued, “He told me that they were there by choice and so was I but I was a product of my nature being played upon.”

“We know you were tricked,” Sam explained.

“Doesn’t mean that it was right for what I did,” Angela replied softly as she looked up at Sam. “I protested to the point where they deceived me so I stayed alive down there.” She looked at Sam, not going into detail on what that meant. “The escape was to get all of us out.”

“You mean…”

“I came up with a plan and I knew for certain that there was a chance it wouldn’t work; the odds weren’t in our favor. And they protested like hell that I was going to take them with me out of hell.” Angela paused as she looked at Sam. “I don’t believe the saying that one good deed is not enough for redemption. One good deed is the start. Took me awhile to convince them but they were with me in the beginning.”

“In the beginning?” Sam had read the account and what she had mentioned at times but this was somewhat different.

“Yes. We started off with the plan and made our way through hell.” Angela paused a moment to think a bit. Then she continued, “There were others that joined. Word spread about me and… I took care of a few souls after their turn on the rack. It was all I could do. They joined and followed. It was a ruckus that made a few choice prison breaks look like it was nothing. But it came with a price.

“One by one they stayed behind and pushed me forward. I did what I could do to try and keep them with me. But it was a fight that…”

Sam wasn’t sure that he wanted to hear more. He did because it did clear up some questions. He didn’t because it was a time that his love didn’t talk about and it she didn’t like because of what it did to her. He reached over to close the book she was looking at but was stopped by her. He looked at her as she looked up at him with that serious expression of hers.

“It ended up being just me and him through the next to the last barrier. He stayed behind to get me through just before the hell hounds were upon us.” She showed Sam her left and moved to a spot just above the bite mark Cerebus gave her to another faint mark. “That was a claw from one that I fended off that attempted to tackle us. But there were a lot of them. He shoved me through and closed the gate. All I heard were snarls and snapping. From there… well you know.”

“That’s… that’s something you’ve never mentioned before.”

“Condemned souls risking more torment to set me free and for what? Easing their suffering on the torture they received?”

“Because you showed kindness no matter who it is.”

Angela smiled tiredly at that. “You always believed that haven’t you Sam?”

Sam smiled at her, “Always. Never stopped.”

Angela smiled and gave a kiss to his cheek. “Maybe there are answers there but couldn’t they wait until morning?” She gestured at the table.

Sam looked at the table and then at her. He nodded, “Alright. Just let me fix this and I’ll be right there. Okay?” He kissed her on the cheek.

“Alright.” Angela looked at the book she had been fingering and then turned to head back to their room.

Sam watched her go back to bed and then turned back towards the stack of books. It was a lot to process since it was something new and she told him for a specific reason. It wouldn’t be too far a stretch to think that she suspected what he was up to. No doubt she had time to think about it and probably came to similar conclusions. He felt guilty for doing this without talking to her and he didn’t want her to worry but she knew.

He picked up the books to stack them and put them in his spot in the library where Sherlock wouldn’t bother them. And he would have to talk to him in the morning, a chore he didn’t look forward to. The last one was the one that Sherlock thumped in front of him and as he closed it, a slip of paper fell out. Actually it was a piece of parchment wrapped around something hard. Curiosity taking over, Sam unwrapped it to find a coin, a very old one and something written on the parchment.

It wasn’t her handwriting since it lacked the elegance he had seen from samples dating back to when she was girl and since then. And it definitely wasn’t Sherlock’s or his or Dean’s. It had the look of someone who studied penmanship since the letters had the tails and the curls and stuff. The coin was more like a medallion and had a sigil etched onto it. Sam knew enough to know that it was Enochian and an angel summoning sigil. He looked at the writing and read it while his thumb rubbed the sigil that felt warm and familiar.

_Hope leaves it’s light even in the most dark of places no matter what happens to it._

Truer words weren’t spoken or even written. While it could be taken as a pick me up phrase, it could also mean a person and what they did. It certainly had Sam thoughtful of that as he fingered the coin as he headed to his room to find her already asleep. He looked at the medallion with a thoughtful look before setting it down on the nightstand and sitting down by the bed. Absently he picked up another book he had pulled from the library and opened it.

He wasn’t going to get much sleep that night but he would do what he could. She would do the same in his position and she would keep fighting in her own way. She always said that she was a taint but given everything that had happened, the people they’ve met… she was different and more. Sherlock was right in that he was onto something and there was a lot of material to work with even being a light of hell.


	19. 11.19 A Light's Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The case with the chitters sends Angie to see Augie and her daughters. There she finds comfort in what the results of her actions caused. Tag to The Chitters.

_How often do you see hunters reach the finish line?_

How many times did that happen? It was a rarity for one lifetime but for Angela, who had lived close to five centuries… there were quite a few times. Yet put into the perspective of normal human lifespans, it made a whole lot of sense. And it was right that Dean didn’t ask Jesse and his partner to help them out with their Amara problem. They had done what they had set out to do and now they earned their rest.

Sitting on the bench, Angela watched as the little girl played with her dog, throwing a stick and giggling when the dog brought it back and gave it to her older sister. It then became a game of chase with the older sister trying to wipe the dog drool on the younger one. It had the dhampir smile as she absently rubbed her abdomen and smiled watching them. She had come here knowing that they would be there and while it could be considered stalking, she was really checking on the girls’ welfare.

“You know there are other ways to ask about the girls.”

Angela looked up at her visitor and made a snort and a smirk and straightened up trying to huff it out but it was difficult due to the changes in her physical structure. “Just doing my job when it comes to the people that matter the most, Augie.”

Augusta chuckled as she took a seat next to her practically mother. She turned towards Angela and even though her eyes couldn’t see anything, she was looking at her. “Now it couldn’t be that you’re finally experiencing what I had with Suri and Andela, could it?”

“Blow it out your ass, Augie.”

“Language.”

“You really want to stick it to me don’t you?” Angela tried to assume a position that was stern but closer towards a pout. It was rather funny and would have had Dean laughing if he could get away with it. “This is punishment for me being so hard on you growing up.”

“No it isn’t. Maybe payback’s a bitch since it’s funny watching you go through your firsts.” Augusta sat back after she was satisfied with her observation in her quiet way. “And it was hilarious when Sam was courting you.”

Angela blew a raspberry at that, making Augusta laugh but the effect was spoiled by the smile on her face. “I was scared out of my mind.”

“And that’s what made it funny since most would think you’ve had experience given how old you are.” Augusta smiled, confident in her position to mention age and other events that could be considered painful. “But I am happy for you.” She heard the hum and asked, “Is that why you’re here visiting and without the watchdog breed known as the Winchesters?”

“I have Gideon,” Angela replied as she gestured to the Wilder dog at her feet as if it justified everything. “And it’s not like they wouldn’t know if I’m in trouble or not. Sam’s been a bit sneaky about it lately.”

“Gee I wonder why.”

“Bite me you brat.”

“I would if I had the teeth for it.”

They both chuckled as they watched the girls play with the dog. Angela watched the elder and commented, “Suri is a good big sister.”

“She was ecstatic when Andela was born. Even as she got older, she preferred her company over others. Andela knows though that if she wants to be with her friends it is nothing personal.”

Angela continued to watch as she commented, “That’s good. At least they are happy.” She then turned to Augusta and asked, “And you Augie? Are you happy?”

Augusta looked at Angela hiding the surprise at the question. She sensed there was a lot behind it and behind the reason that the woman who raised her was here by herself and in her condition. Actually she suspected Sam wasn’t too far behind or at least he was relaxed enough to know she was okay and she didn’t blame him. Still… “Why are you asking?”

“Just making sure.”

That was the signal that this conversation was to go into a deeper vein. Augusta decided to humor and it would give her an opening. “I am. I was happy when Mikhael came along and things went as they did. When Suri was born… and then Andela… I am happy. I have my husband and two daughters. I have a family.”

“Hmm.” Angela looked off thoughtfully as she watched the girls.

“What’s with the inquisition? Are you happy?”

Angela looked at Augusta as if she were crazy to suggest that she wasn’t. “Yes, of course.” She turned to look watch and thought about something for a moment before saying. “Just one of those thought trains.”

“Meaning that you wonder about things and if it would be different and if it was worth it in the end kind of thing,” Augusta said more as a statement rather than a question.

Angela gave a slight nod, “That but I know it’s worth it because of the lives that are led by the people I’ve met. You turned out alright.” She gave Augusta a shoulder bump and a grin.

“But…”

“I’m fine Augie. Really.” Angela looked to see that Augusta wasn’t totally buying it. Then again that was her fault. She always strove to show a strong front in front of others and it was no wonder people always were surprised when she showed a burst of emotion. Sighing she continued, “I really am, Augie. This last case, one I was allowed to go on… it really made some things clear to me. You know that after I first died, it was all about some form of revenge. I twisted it that way even though my father gave his life for mine.”

Augusta was familiar with the story. It was one that she had heard when she was going through her tough times herself. And it was a bit of a shock to learn that she had those feelings and was capable of feeling like a person. Well actually she knew that Angela was a caring and loving person since she raised her but to learn of her past… “But not completely. You took in your strays and taught them. You raised me.” She smiled at her adoptive mother.

“But I never really thought about the end. Settling down and not really thinking about the next job. Being happy that it’s done. I felt relief when the demon that killed Mary was gone but not completely. Like I still have work to do.” Angela turned to look at the two girls. “Even now my job is not done and… it terrifies me.”

“Because of the baby?”

“A little but mostly because this is going into a realm that is unknown. I don’t know what it means to stand in front of Amara. I mean she just stared at me and let me go and she would have every reason to go after me and use me instead of Lucifer. According to her… I was the one that fought and imprisoned her in the Mark.”

Augusta made a soothing sound in her throat. She sensed the anxiety building up and reached out to soothe the older woman. “But you also said that she couldn’t touch you like Dean because of what you did. So this is unknown for her too. She doesn’t know what you are capable of.”

“I think she does. At least the part that I have no memory of. So I guess that makes us even.”

“Nice to see you thinking positive.”

Angela made a slight sound as she continued to watch the girls. “The real reason I came Augie was because I wanted to see you and the girls. And to see the results of my being on the job.”

“You made it possible to keep my secret with Suri and were willing to make so we never knew you.” Augusta felt the tears start to prick at her eyes. She never thought that Angela would do that for her and it was touching because doing so would have meant that they would have been safe.

“Seeing you and the girls safe… it makes me happy. It’s my comfort.”

At that moment the two girls came up each calling out, “Nana!”

Angela smiled at Augusta before turning toward the girls and opened her arms out to hug them. She welcomed the girls and remarked on how tall Suri was getting and that Andela was looking pretty. Augusta watched as they hugged their grandmother though it was kind of funny to think about it. After all Angela was five hundred plus and she didn’t look like it. She could tell from the auras that they were happy.

Augusta knew that Angela had a long and hard life and the first signs of true happiness were when she met the Winchesters. She wasn’t jealous of that since she believed herself in different kinds of love too. She would always be loved like a daughter and that was how it was. With the Winchesters, particularly Sam, it was different and it was showing and not just because of the new addition that would arrive in the months ahead.

Angela was scared. That she could see but it was outweighed by the happiness and contentment of family. The last case with the chitters had been a good influence in that it drove Angela to think about what was important. Sometimes that was all that was needed in order to have things put into perspective. In this case, it was the comfort of family and seeing the product of difficult choices that had been made and what would eventually be made. There were plenty of those down the road but Augusta was confident that the comfort to her adoptive mother had now would keep her going; that her family would be a comfort to the light.


	20. 11.20 Daughter of Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God is back and wearing the Prophet Chuck and he needs to have a talk. First things first as he decides to have a talk with his Malachi of Absolution and explain and clear up a few things. Tag to Don't Call Me Shurley.

“We should probably talk.”

That was an understatement and probably the understatement of the millennium as Angela stared at Chuck. Well it wasn’t Chuck; that much she could pick up and given that Dean’s old amulet was glowing… No this was God standing in front of her. And it had her speechless.

She had thought it was the end when Amara’s fog started coming in and infected Sam. Like Dean, she wasn’t infected even though both kept trying to shoo her out and maybe she was being foolish. She couldn’t really blame it on pregnancy hormones; it was just her refusal to leave because she would never leave either brother behind willingly. Not if she could do something and maybe she was gambling with the fact that Amara wasn’t going to destroy her.

She had an inkling why on that level since she admitted to Dean that she had done what she had done when they were curing him. Also Amara couldn’t kill her the last few times they met and it seemed to piss her off a little. Either way, she was being foolish and firmly entrenched in ‘always and forever’ as she whispered to Sam while staying by his side. She also did what she could by tapping into her powers.

She had always said she shouldn’t be a healer because of what she was. Yet she knew that healers were born and not made. It was instinctual and natural for her to tap into those abilities and try to help. It was what she always did and often it was to a degree that had her baffled. Since meeting Amara, some things did start to make sense. It didn’t mean that she was going to buy into it completely. It was the kind of thing to help one sleep at night even with crazy things such as talking to God.

It had been hard for either Winchester to believe that she had talked to God. It was hard to believe herself since the man or being was there in front of her but not even responding to the state of the world. At the time she thought she was going crazy and she was at one point. She was willing to believe that since God didn’t speak to her after that. Until now.

Staring at Chuck, it was better to think of him that way for now, she blinked and completely speechless for about a minute before saying, “Understatement of the millennium I think.”

Chuck gave a sheepish grin and replied, “And you still have the gift of dropping zingers like that.” He sighed with a pleased smile on his face. “How big you’ve grown.”

That could have been taken either way. Angela, being who she was, knew that it was not in reference to her expanding waistline. It was fairly obvious and didn’t quite produce a shock like it did for most people who knew her in a past life. However, both Winchesters took it to mean that and she had to tap them on the shoulder to indicate to them to back off. “You could pick a better choice of words,” she replied.

“I could but right now I need to talk to you first. Alone.”

Before anything could be said, Angela found herself back in the garden from her first conversation with God and looked around a bit wildly. “What the…”

“Don’t worry. You’re still there just here,” Chuck said as he came into view. He smiled at her and crossed his arms to grip his upper arms. “You really have grown big.”

“And I take it to mean something other than the obvious.” Angela gestured at her swollen abdomen. “Sam and Dean…”

“Just doing their jobs. Sam especially.” Chuck walked towards her and looked at her with a serious and yet benign expression. “He’s come a long way because of you.”

“I don’t know about that and I still think I’m crazy for talking to you in this place then and now… now and…” She sighed and crossed her arms over her chest, well aware it looked a little funny but she could still pull a bitch face or that look that could melt lead.

Chuck nodded at that. “And I gave you a bit of a talking to when you were taking care of your brother, Castiel.”

“Cas is my guardian angel.” It felt silly to correct something that pretty much held a grain of truth but it was what made her comfortable.

“He is your brother though,” Chuck replied. He watched her expression and actually remembered why he had done what he had done and he was pleased with what he was seeing. “It is true. You were once an angel. And so was Sam. He is your twin, your other half. Gives a whole new meaning to soul mates.”

Angela looked at Chuck and blinked as it sunk in that he was verifying what Amara had said and implied. She figured it had to be true since there were various people that had a larger account of trust where she was concerned that were saying the same thing. It was just different hearing it from the man himself. She merely stared and it was a bit uncomfortable before she finally said, “It does. So did I ask or was I sent?”

“I sent you after you asked me to end it.”

Angela nodded at that and made a slight face, “That makes some sense considering…”

“Always and forever,” Chuck said. He watched as she looked at him with look that demanded how he knew that. He explained, “You both always said that when you agreed to do your job together or not at all. And it meant a lot more than having each other’s backs.” He sighed as he looked at the garden at the various flowers. “I didn’t want to let you go after what my sister did to your twin and what followed. I didn’t want you destroyed.”

Angela said nothing but let Chuck explain. It was something she hadn’t expected since finding the amulet again since she thought she had that locked away where none could find it. She was finding out answers to what had been haunting her though why just her and not her and Sam… that was another question.

Chuck knew that she would have questions eventually and continued, “So I decided to send you to live on earth. I took away your grace and your memories of everything and sent you there and then your twin shortly after. You would have to find each other but you would both have chances to be reborn.”

“Why not together?”

“Because you needed to live. By continuing to search for your other half, you would live.” Chuck cleared his throat slightly. “I wanted you to live.”

“You…”

“You were created as an embodiment of everything I am: faith, hope and love. The equivalent of life and light. It was unexpected when you split into two, each carrying a part of the other. I didn’t know what that meant and still don’t but since then… You both have been special.”

It was a lot to take in at the moment and Angela wasn’t sure if she wanted to curse at God, which she would do like she did to the angels, or if she should shut down and demand to be sent back or something. She put a hand on her abdomen and felt the life within her move as she thought about what she had just heard. She looked at Chuck who was looking very sorry, like he had done her wrong. From what he was saying though, she had behaved as much as she had done when Sam had first died and then the times after that. He did what he thought best… like her own father.

“Look, I wanted you to hear from me what I know you must have heard especially from my sister. And…” Chuck looked up at her and shrugged. “I need you to know.”

“It certainly makes sense but… why should I know? Yes, I will help people but… what is the purpose? Does Amara want to kill me?”

“Maybe. She always destroyed what I created. She almost did when she killed your other half. But then you imprisoned her in the Mark and…” Chuck trailed off knowing that it would eventually click. That and he really didn’t want to talk about it.

“But what am I supposed to do? I really can’t fight looking like this. And afterwards?”

Chuck looked at her and gave a slight shrug. “Live.” He gave a slight smile as he watched her fall into silence. He knew that she would act if she knew she could do something to help. That was who she was when he created her and her twin. “It’s all I ever wanted for you. To live.”

Angela looked at Chuck as she absorbed his words. She then looked away at the garden. It was the exact same one from her first conversation with God. It had the same coloring in flowers but all were roses. She recalled the conversation from before. She was quiet for a moment and then looked back at Chuck. “I am living. I came alive when I met Sam. So what do you need me to do?”

Chuck looked at her. He may have told Metatron that he was a disappointment as well as humanity but… it wasn’t a total loss. And he was never disappointed with her despite everything that had happened. It was as his scribe had said, that humanity never gave up. He had always wondered how she fared living among humans without her grace. It seemed that he found his answer. She would do what needed to be done but always with others in forefront. It was all he could ask of her. “Just do what you have always done and live.”

He watched her expression before he snapped his finger and they were back where they were with Dean demanding why they should let her go with him alone. Chuck watched as it dawned on first Sam and then Dean that the conversation already happened. It wasn’t a complete surprise to them since more than likely the various other beings in existence had done the same. He watched them not saying anything but observing. He watched as Sam slipped his hand into hers and give a gentle squeeze. He had no idea what he created when they split and made two and as he said, he still didn’t. It was an experiment and perhaps, apart from humanity, it was one of his greatest accomplishments. And it was true that he didn’t want her to die.

Maybe it was cruel that he had them separated all this time or at least periodically they found each other. In the end though, it made them stronger. He could see it in both. She was like a raging fire wind and he was the quiet fuse until it was too late. It was a nice complement. In the end Chuck decided that it was best things happened as they did and the fact that a new generation was to be born… it was exciting. He hoped the kid would turn out like her parents. Yes he knew. He was God after all. That would be an interesting story. He looked at the trio and was ready to talk.


	21. 11.21 Light of the Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chuck saved the prophet Donatello, Sam and Lucifer by teleporting them back to the bunker but there still needs to be a family discussion and Angie seems to be the one to be the voice of reason. Tag to All in the Family.

“Occasionally I answer a prayer.”

“More like start a conversation on the unsuspecting.”

Chuck looked at Angela as she got out of the Impala and couldn’t help but chuckle at that. It turned into a lopsided grin as she approached to give a hand with Lucifer. Even with everything that happened she still lent a helping hand. “It was unexpected. I don’t blame you for thinking you went crazy.”

“Oh plenty of other stuff that caused that.”

“Is little sister actually back?”

Chuck looked at Lucifer even though he was inhabiting Castiel’s vessel with a slightly stern look. Angela merely raised her brow after glancing at Sam and Donatello. It had been a crazy and unsettling time explaining to an atheist that there was such a thing as God and angels and god had sister intent on destroying the world. This was about to top the cake.

Angela lighted her gaze on Sam and they locked eyes for a moment. Chuck watched as they seemed to “speak” to each other. No words were spoken and the barest hint of emotion was displayed except for a raised eyebrow and maybe the slightest movement of eyes. It had Chuck impressed at the level of communication between the pair. He hadn’t seen that in the beginning.

Lucifer scoffed, “Oh don’t keep us in suspense, little sister.”

Angela turned at that moment to look at Lucifer with a bland expression. Had Chuck known, he would have recognized it as the look that Sam thoroughly hated since it told nothing of her actual thoughts and feelings. She then glanced at Chuck with a raised brow to silently ask.

Chuck sort of guessed at what she was asking and gave a nod. He could have easily done it but it was actually amusing to watch as his ‘daughter’ reached up and tapped Lucifer on the forehead and the injured angel was healed. It was actually funny to watch the expression on Lucifer’s face as he looked at her as she stared back. To anyone not accustomed to watching angels or even ‘humans’ not afraid to stand up to them, it looked like it was going to be a fight that was going to make what Amara wanted to do look like a hair pulling.

Knowing that he was going to have to have a talk, Chuck cleared his throat and said, “I guess we should have a talk.”

“A good idea, Chuck,” Angela replied as she continued to stare at Lucifer.

It didn’t take much for Sam to convince Donatello to leave them alone. Chuck got the feeling that it mostly had to do with the pregnant woman standing in front of Lucifer and looking ready to smite his ass if she could. He observed Sam pause and murmured her name. Her response was a sound in her throat that could have meant anything but it was clear to Sam and he left with the new prophet and left the three of them in the garage.

Chuck watched as Angela shifted and stood there and merely stared at Lucifer. Lucifer was staring back but it was clear that he was uncomfortable with it. Chuck saw that he was going to have to be the one to do the talking and broke in, “Well I never expected this.”

“Neither did I,” Angela offered as she stood looking cool and calm. “But I think it is a long overdue conversation.”

“Oh don’t try to brown nose. You’re terrible at it,” Lucifer scoffed. He gestured at her abdomen and added, “And don’t use the bun in the oven card.”

“And if you truly knew me, you’d know I don’t use it,” Angela replied in a calm and deliberate fashion.

Chuck realized that she was angry but being calm about it. That, from experience, was the dangerous kind to be around. He did remember when she first met him and how she was. And the nickname Vengeful Virago stuck and it shared a spot with Harridan of Hell. He intervened, “Enough. Don’t, Lucifer.”

“Why? We both know she’s your favorite. It makes me wonder why Auntie Amara didn’t go after her.” Lucifer gestured at Angela who was standing there looking nonplussed at the discussion. “After all she was the one that cast the spell.”

“And you speak of a time that I have no memory of except what Amara decided to show me after she was released.” Angela looked at Lucifer with a look that said he was pulling at straws. “Not to mention the ones you have of me or was that a fantasy?” Her look became pointed before she glanced at Chuck. She stepped away and added, “Doesn’t matter since the big picture is Amara.”

“Always thinking of the big picture,” Lucifer mocked as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Tell me something: does that big picture include that kid inside of you?”

Angela didn’t say anything but continued to walk until she was looking at her car. Chuck had explored the bunker and had examined the car. It was a beauty and it amused him that she liked classic muscle cars or rather anything that was fast but she had a soft spot for them. She was quiet for a moment before saying, “I always consider. More so in the last ten years.” She turned to look at Lucifer and continued, “So when I say that Amara is the big picture… that means everyone.”

“Yearbook answer.”

Chuck knew he was going to have to step in though he figured Lucifer wouldn’t do anything drastic since the little one was special. “Alright enough. Lucifer, be nice to your sister.”

“I’m only tolerating that reference to prevent confusion and argument,” Angela replied, “Considering that I wouldn’t want to be his sister if I was given a choice.” She shifted on her feet and looked at Chuck. “So what are you going to do now?”

Chuck had to admit that she had a way of getting people that needed to make decisions to think about it and make a decision. And he figured it had to be because that there were quite a bit of people that put their problems on her and she shouldered it. She was basically telling him that he was the one that had to make the decision since Amara was his problem; she was his sister. He looked at Lucifer who was looking like a petulant child.

“If you don’t want to tell Sam and Dean about what happened the last time then you can tell me. I don’t remember anyway.”

“And there is the don’t care attitude that people just flock to.” Lucifer leaned against the wall he was standing against. “Such a kiss ass.”

“It’s not that I don’t care. There isn’t a point in fretting over what I do and don’t remember. Right now… what’s the next step?” She shrugged her shoulders at Lucifer. “You have any ideas?”

“You’re asking me now? You didn’t even want to cooperate with me in the Cage.”

“And I believe it’s because I remember what you did to me and to Sam and at the time I wasn’t a happy camper that you were trying to hurt him again.” Angela gave Lucifer a pointed look as she crossed her arms across her chest.

“Calm down you two,” Chuck intervened. He gestured in a placating way as he looked at the pair. “I think we need to talk.”

“Oh now you want to talk?” Lucifer looked at Chuck with a disbelieving expression. “After how many centuries being locked in the Cage while you let her and her boy toy live in this hole without remembering who they are?”

Chuck motioned for Lucifer to calm down. “I… did what I did and that’s it and I’m not willing to work with you.” His lips pursed in a thin line as he thought about what he wanted to say. Then he said, “Now…”

“Please. We all know that she is your favorite. They both are.” Lucifer waved his hand at Chuck and turned away. He didn’t want to hear it.

Chuck narrowed his eyes and with a slight move of his finger sent Lucifer flying into a column. He was going to repeat the action when Angela got between him and Lucifer. “What are you doing Angie?”

“Stop.”

It wasn’t an answer to the question and Chuck was ready to bypass her but he didn’t. He took in her stance. She had one hand extended towards him and the other in the general direction of Lucifer. She was looking at him though with a firm look. She repeated, “Stop.”

“Oh…”

“Lucifer.”

Chuck watched as Lucifer shut his mouth after the warning and look from Angela. He truly was impressed by her development over the centuries. He almost took a step back when she turned her head to look at him as if to dare him to try anything. He lifted his hands in surrender and didn’t lower them until she lowered hers with a slight look of suspicion of both parties and replied, “Well that was exciting.”

“While you two are in my home, you will act like responsible adults. _Human_ adults.” Angela shot a look at Chuck before turning towards Lucifer. She held up a warning finger and said, “Don’t argue technicalities. My home. My rules.” She turned to look at Chuck and asked, “Do you understand, Chuck?”

“Crystal,” Chuck replied with a slight shrug. He put his hands into his jacket pocket. “Seems like time gave you a firmer backbone.”

“Call it hormones,” Angela countered with wry grin. She looked at Lucifer and checked him over. “Are you alright?”

Lucifer frowned in confusion. “Why do you care?”

Angela studied Lucifer for a moment before replying, “You may be an ass but that doesn’t mean you don’t get compassion. I don’t begrudge anyone that could use it. And it’s not pity.” She dusted the trench coat off before turning away.

“Not pity?”

Chuck watched as Angela paused as she processed what Lucifer said. She looked at him before moving her head to look behind her and reply, “No. Compassion is not pity.”

Lucifer was quiet as she eyed him before she turned to look at Chuck. Chuck looked at the pair of them. They were both his creation but they were vastly different. It was the way they were. She, and her twin, were the culmination of everything of the light and Lucifer was the Morningstar. Both were related to the light and yet they turned out very different. Both had bad things happen and yet… she was the one that picked up and moved on. She gave compassion even to ones he thought didn’t deserve it; he witnessed it now.

Chuck knew that the discussion regarding Amara wasn’t finished. The look she gave him said that. For now it was tabled as they stood in there to agree on some form of being nice with each other. Technically Chuck didn’t have to listen to her since he was God but… he felt compelled to respect her wishes. He had heard Dean mention Sam going alpha on her but he suspected that it was a mutual respect between the two of them but when push came to shove, she was the one that went alpha. Looking at the pair of beings that were a part of the light, Chuck knew that he was going to have to eventually come to a decision. He didn’t like the fact there was baggage between him and Lucifer but looking at Angela, it seemed she was determined to keep the peace. And for that, he would try.


	22. 11.22 The Light of the Few

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God has a plan to trap Amara but he needs to have a talk with Angie about things in general and a chat with Sam about the Mark. Tag to We Happy Few.

The plan was simple. It was a means to weaken Amara and put her back into the Mark. It sounded simple when Chuck laid it out but from experience, Angela knew that it was not as simple as it seemed. It might be from experience or just being a little bit pessimistic. Either way the whole thing had her feeling uneasy; she had a sense of foreboding.

“It will work. It did last time.”

Angela turned to look at Chuck as he looked at her. He almost seemed to have a sad expression on his face and a calm acceptance that sort of seemed like guilt or sadness. It was hard to tell and she wasn’t going to try the empath thing. She replied, “And yet, there is a great amount of power and risk involved and the end result could be death.”

“Isn’t that always the case when something important is on the line?” Chuck had come in looking to talk to Angela and instead found her in thought and he had an idea of what. He wanted to find out though and knew that his line of questioning could put her on defensive like the one he just asked.

Angela looked at Chuck as he looked at her with that inquisitive look that she was familiar with and sort of liked when he was just Chuck the prophet. “I’ll give you that point since I’ve seen battles that had a similar stance… one being outnumbered by the other.”

“But something bothers you. About this.”

“I am always bothered when about to go into a battle that could mean certain death. I actually fought in wars… ones that I remember.” Angela grinned at Chuck since she knew he was going to mention her time before when she was one of God’s power rangers. “And I’ve seen what people can do to each other.”

“But this bothers you more than that.” Chuck approached her. He had a look of concern on his face and, like a parent, he tentatively reached out and fingered her cheek, trying to figure out what was wrong. “What is it?”

Angela let Chuck touch her and studied his expression. It was almost ridiculously funny the scene was since Chuck was a head shorter than she was. Still, it was a welcome touch and she could see the reaction was genuine. Much like how the tension and emotions were earlier when she made Lucifer and Chuck sit down and talk. Taking a deep breath, she replied, “Just that… I don’t know. Just a feeling I guess.”

“Are you upset because I didn’t put you back in the lineup?”

It was a question uttered in an almost childlike fashion and it had Angela wonder if that was what it was meant when Jesus said that faith has to be like that of a child. “No. But it does call into question whether or not I had anything to do the first time Amara was placed in the Mark.”

“Oh you did,” Chuck affirmed. His expression saddened a bit. “I left a lot out and it was out of respect for you but… after what Amara did to your twin. It was like you changed but didn’t and it almost tore the basic fabric.” He looked at her with a saddened expression.

Angela blinked at that and made the connection. “So when Sam first died wasn’t the first time?”

“No,” Chuck replied with a shake of his head. “And when I felt it, I was concerned and checked in on you because the last time… it wasn’t just physical. You would have killed her.”

Angela studied the sad expression on Chuck’s face. Hearing that made her glad she didn’t remember. Maybe it was the kindness that Chuck said it was. “So it was a kindness that I don’t remember. And it fits that I am not what people say I am down here.”

“I wish you wouldn’t say that.”

Angela looked at Chuck with a raised brow, “What? It’s true. I’ve been the worst sort of thing to be down here. I’ve killed people and even though I helped I was basically a monster that was feared and still feared.”

“Not to those you saved and dared to interact with.” Chuck looked at her firmly before he made a waving motion and on the wall, like a movie reel, played memories of people Angela had met and fought, protected and cared for. “To them you were their savior. A friend. A champion. What you always were. What happened with Amara… that was because you were hurt. It is no different than what I have seen for other humans. If you don’t believe me, believe them. Believe that which is your family: Bobby, Jo, Ellen, Mary…Dean… Sam.”

Angela looked at the footage that was playing and then at Chuck. She knew what he was saying was right. Sam had been saying it to her all these years and it was because he believed it fully. Then there was Augusta and her family… She nodded, “I know but… I just have a bad feeling and it’s not for me but for you. I get the feeling that something bad is going to happen to you.”

“Me?”

“Call it intuition or whatever but…” Angela looked at the wall that had been playing her memories before looking back at Chuck, “Every time I’ve been face to face with Amara, I’ve felt this sense that something big is going to happen and not in a good way. It’s hard to explain and the fact that she hasn’t tried to kill me for the first time…” She shrugged slightly and turned away to press a hand to her forehead.”

Chuck stared at her back and noted that some of the smaller things started rattling. “Calm down, Angie. I believe you.”

Angela turned just as the rattling stopped. She raised her brow at that. She took in Chuck’s expression that still had sadness in it but he was trying to be comforting like a parent. She turned to face him fully when he nodded silently that he believed her. “Then at least let me be there when you confront her.”

Chuck looked at her. His gaze drifted downward to her swollen abdomen. Apart from the past, it was that reason that prompted Chuck to not list her in the original lineup. That new life… true he knew all those born and to be born, this was a marvel to him because it was child of his original true souls. There were others that followed but they were the first. “I can’t.”

“Please.”

“Angie…” Chuck made a slight gesture at her abdomen. “You’re a lot of things and many of them good but… you wouldn’t do anything to risk innocent life.”

Angela knew that and she knew what she was proposing was unlike her but she couldn’t explain that she felt she had to be there. She could try explaining it and at least Sam would listen but she knew that he would put his foot down on this one since the last time was still firmly in his mind. “I know but… I feel like I need to be there. I don’t know why and I get that it may be after my previous encounters with Amara that it might be a drawing to her but… If you or Sam tell me to stay behind, I’m telling you know I’ll find a way to follow. Fair warning.”

“I’d listen to her.”

Chuck turned at the same time Angela looked up to see Sam coming in. He had a slight grim look on his face like he had been listening to the entire conversation. Sam walked right up and repeated, “I’d listen to her cause she’ll do it.” He gestured at her and stood looking like he was trying hard not to get upset.

“And that is after I consider everything,” Angela gently reminded Sam. “Always.” Her expression softened but still held that serious note.

It was enough to soften Sam’s grim expression a little and Chuck watched the whole thing. It wasn’t Sam being a pushover but merely acknowledging her decision even if he didn’t agree with it. There was also that level of trust that Chuck thought was pretty amazing. She did what she did and trusted Sam and Dean to be there when she needed it and had great faith in them even when they didn’t. Apart from his guilty pleasures, just monitoring them was one thing he liked to do because even though he knew about them he still didn’t know everything. What he was seeing now was probably a result of his sending their souls to live as mortals on earth.

“Always,” Sam replied softly with a slight nod. “I thought you’d be plotting again.”

“Only on family things,” she said with a slight mischievous grin. “I was just here thinking about how to say it and then…”

“I walked in and it ended up being this,” Chuck interrupted. He glanced at Angela before looking at Sam and continued, “And I have something that I needed to talk about with you, Sam.”

Angela sensed it was something that was related to what they were going to do and she could have forced her way into the conversation but decided against it. She had already pressed with the need to be there. “I’ll go and make sure Lucifer isn’t breaking my rules.”

Chuck couldn’t help but give a slight smile. Even he was compelled to do what she said when she laid down the ground rules. While most would laugh, Chuck understood the concept of alpha and subordinate and while he was God, he could feel the authority coming from her. He knew she was leaving out of respect and held his hand up to stop her. “I actually need you both to hear this.”

Angela stopped and turned to give her attention. Even while pregnant she had a commanding and attentive presence when the need for it arose. She shifted on her feet and asked, “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Okay Chuck. What gives?”

Chuck sighed at this part. It would be a tough sell and he really couldn’t ask it of them but… “It’s about the Mark. About what happens once I cage Amara.”

“I’m not letting you put Angie in the fight. It’s bad enough she wants to be there…” Sam was quick to lay down his objections.

“I know and I’m not asking that,” Chuck replied not bothering to be reassuring.

“You’re talking about placement of the Mark,” Angela quietly stated forcing Chuck to look at her.

“Yes. It needs to be placed on someone who hasn’t been tainted by her. Lucifer can’t.” Chuck looked at the pair of them.

“Well I’m not letting Angie do anything like that,” Sam firmly stated. “So it’s me or Dean.”

“Dean can’t either.” Chuck gave a poignant look at Sam before adding, “He’s been tainted by the mark too.”

It was quiet for a moment until Sam said, “Then I’ll do it.”

“Are you sure?”

Sam nodded and repeated, “I’ll do it. I understand what it means.”

Chuck expected a protest from Angela but she didn’t. Rather she turned and looked silently at Sam. It surprised him when Sam caught her eye and shook his head and said, “No Angie. I mean it.”

“Sam.”

“No. I can’t ask you to do that.”

“And I am not being asked. I am choosing to do it.”

It was still something to get used to since Chuck was certain that there was a lot of that nonverbal talking they did through a look or an expression or sometimes done on the sly. The intimate gestures were interesting but this… He raised his hand to try and interrupt but was waved off. Another surprise.

“And I’m saying not to,” Sam was saying.

“I know the risks Sam,” Angela replied in a calm and quiet tone. It had worked over the years in keeping things from escalating into a shouting match since she always believed that shouting didn’t help but occasionally you did have to let it out. “And I know what to look for.”

“It’s not the same. You’re pregnant.”

“It’s not like a blood connection. It’s just plain watching.”

Chuck watched. It was really simple with the watching and he thought that maybe Sam was making a little more out of it than it really was. But he was sure he had his reasons. It was a matter of hearing them out.

“And what’s gonna happen if I really lose it? I don’t want to hurt you or the baby.”

“Do you give me that little credit?”

“I trust you. Always have.” Sam sighed and ran a hand through his locks as he looked away and at Chuck. “Can’t you see that I’m scared of myself and what I’d do if I couldn’t control it?”

The silence was deafening for that one moment until Angela replied, “I do.” When Sam looked at her along with Chuck, she continued, “I can see it in you, Dean, even Lucifer, Chuck… I’m scared of what I can do. I can say it’s human nature but I don’t know about Chuck or angels in general but… it’s okay to be scared otherwise the choices made here on out won’t be made with such consideration. Only a fool goes in without admitting to fear.

“I know what bearing the Mark means. And I know you are worried about what happened with Dean but that was complicated. This time… I’m fine. I’m me and I don’t intend to do anything like that. As I said, I know what to look for. I know you don’t want me to but I want to. Always and forever.”

Chuck watched as Sam studied her. They stared at each other almost as if they were going to just finish it silently. Then Sam said, “Always and forever but… it might not end good.”

“I have faith. I’ve always believed in you.” Angela gave a smile at that like that was all there was to it.

“You promise that if everything goes sideways, you do what you have to do to keep me from going all… you know.” Sam stared at her with a firm look that meant he wasn’t going to tolerate any changing to suit her purposes.

“You have my word. But just to let you know, I believe it will work out.” Angela leaned in close to almost whisper it. “Always and forever il mio cuore.”

Sam looked at her and nodded before looking at Chuck. “Okay. I’ll take the Mark.”

Chuck didn’t say anything at first. He didn’t expect this. The argument maybe but not the way it played out. It was a lot to ask since Sam was about to become a father and if the worst thing were to happen, it would leave mother and child alone. “Okay then. I don’t suppose you could give a pep talk to the troops Angie?”

Angela grinned, “I could but you know I’m lousy at speeches.”

“They’re better than Dean quoting speeches,” Sam replied as he took her hand and led the way out with Chuck following behind.

From there it was a gathering of the forces to generate the power necessary to weaken Amara. It certainly was a sight to see since it seemed like the most unlikely thing of witches, angels and demons working together. It did help though when Angela spoke up and said that they did have a common enemy and said that if they valued at least their own existence if not for all of the world, then they should fight. To Chuck it was rousing and allowed him to lay down the plan.

“I know we have a plan but I’m only doing it because my sweetheart made it sound good even if it suicide.”

Angela heard the comments but didn’t say anything and kept her attention on Chuck. The plan was simple even though the risk was higher than anything they had done previously. She hoped that it worked more for Dean’s sake since she knew that he wasn’t keen on Sam taking on the Mark. She didn’t like that it had come to this but… she was where she was supposed to be and she could only wait and see what would happen and how it played out.


	23. 11.23 Light's Beginning and End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is round two of Chuck versus Amara and the plan is to kill her. However, Angie thinks there is a chance and gives one last effort. Tag to Alpha and Omega.

It was their plan B; instead of trapping Amara, they were going to kill her. At this point, it was pretty much all they had and what Sam had pointed out, the scales would be balanced. That was how the world functioned. Without it… all life would cease.

Angela always was a believer in the balance of all things. She knew the consequences of trying to damage that balance. It was how she came back from the dead; her father appealed to the council and traded his life for hers so she would live. And it stuck with her all these centuries. It made her despise herself and feel unworthy and it was amplified when she was imprisoned and tortured in hell and she became the dark hero the world lauded about… praised about. Yet she understood the implications.

She didn’t like the plan overmuch and she knew that Chuck didn’t either. It was never about killing Amara but now… Angela knew what it was like to be on that last thread that was about to break. She had been there and done that and more times than she cared to admit and remember. Sam and Dean knew how far she would go for humanity and it was fueled by her love for them and the new life growing within her.

“It bothers you doesn’t it?”

Angela walked back towards Chuck with the cup of tea she had made. It was the same tea she had made for Sam when he was going through the trials. It helped with most supernatural caused illnesses and she recalled fondly when Sam gave her the same tea when she was suffering from her injuries from that hellhound he killed. She looked at Chuck as she handed him the cup. “The fact that plan B is destruction… pretty much.”

“You never really liked fighting and I’m sorry that it came to that before.” Chuck leaned against the wall and gave an apologetic smile. “I never wanted you to lift a blade.”

“Well what’s done is done,” she replied as she sat down beside Chuck. “I mean I love a good fight every now and then. Call it a part of the nature of my current incarnation.” She shrugged her shoulders. “But I really don’t like playing with the balance of things. There are always consequences.”

“And you’re right,” Chuck pointed out. He took a sip of the tea. He hummed a bit as he tasted it. “This is good.”

“It helps in a pinch. It did for Sam.”

“When he was going through the trials. I know.”

Angela nodded at that. She sipped her own tea and absently rubbed her abdomen. She watched as Chuck took another sip. His coloring was better but it was only a matter of time before he was gone. And their best choice was to collect souls to create a bomb to destroy Amara. She refused to believe that it was the only choice, that there was another and it just hasn’t been thought of yet. What if…

“You’re planning something.”

Angela shifted to look at Chuck. He was staring at her like he was going to probe her innermost secrets. She raised her brow at him. “Whatever do you mean?”

Chuck shook his head and smiled, “You always did manage to keep from stating the obvious. Never revealing your hand. So… tell me.”

Angela studied Chuck for a moment before she finally said, “There is another way.” Her gaze lighted upon Chuck and held his gaze.

Chuck kept the look and it felt like he could see into her soul. He was starting to understand how it was possible that her and Sam could read and understand each other without words. He thought he had the answer. “You want to see her.”

“I am going to talk to her,” Angela clarified. She knew that it sounded ridiculous, so she continued on, “I may like a good fight every now and then but the one thing that I always do is try talking people out of fighting. Even at my worst, it was what I did before resorting to violence and even then, my choices were towards…”

“I know,” Chuck replied waving her off. He had seen it and he saw her pain and suffering. It was one of his biggest regrets. “Do it.”

Angela blinked as she realized what Chuck was saying. She knew he didn’t want to kill Amara. And in truth… she didn’t want her dead either and part of it was because she understood the balance of things but she also could understand the pain that Amara went through once she calmed down from the threat that Amara implied. She raised her brow to silently ask if Chuck was sure.

“I’m sure, Angie. If you can talk to her maybe…” Chuck made a slight gesture like it was nothing left to lose. He looked at her. “Do what you can.”

~0~0~0~0~

The park was rather pleasant… except for the planter of dead flowers. Amara looked all around and then up at the sky. She saw the state of the sun and then looked around.

“Beautiful isn’t it?”

Amara turned to see Angela standing there. She studied the woman and noted the rounded middle through the soft silvery material. She recognized the gown. Of course her brother would give it to her. “What do you want?”

“Only to talk,” Angela replied as she took a step forward. The silvery material felt like it was getting a charge as she walked closer. It wasn’t like it was trying to defend. It was reacting to Amara and her power. She lifted her hand and gestured, “I am not here to fight. I don’t want to.”

Amara looked at her with a slight frown. “You don’t want to try to kill me? After what I did to your twin?”

Angela studied Amara and closed her eyes when she felt the breeze trickle through. She opened them and replied, “That was a long time ago and I don’t remember anyway. Why would I try something for a thing I can’t remember and wouldn’t want to?”

Amara frowned at that, “You don’t want to remember?”

“No,” Angela replied as she shook her head. She gave a slight smile. “It was then and the sum of my life are the memories I do have. Previous lives however brief they are as well. Besides… I don’t’ think I like how I was then. How angry… violent…”

“But you fight. You’ve shed blood…” Amara was baffled by it.

“And I’ve not enjoyed it at all,” Angela admitted. She held her hand over her abdomen as she looked at the other woman. “There is no pleasure in taking life. Only the most sinister would; they would have no heart.” She studied Amara with a pointed look and paused. “What is wrong, Amara?”

Amara frowned at Angela. She couldn’t understand this creature. She had done things to her in the beginning and now at the end of it all… the woman just wanted to talk and be friends. It was baffling to her. She had never met anyone that showed as much compassion and whatever it was that she couldn’t name. She looked at the woman looking at her and frowned, “Why do you ask that?”

“Call it idle interest if you want but I call it concern.” Angela took a breath before she took a step forward. “Ever since we met… as much as I was angry at you for threatening my mate… I’ve been concerned about you. And that is the honest truth. I was concerned about all that rage you have within you.”

“Why do you care?”

“I sensed your anger and suffering. When I sense trouble and if I can do something to help, I offer it.”

“Even if it is futile?”

“Especially that. Because I like to believe that there is always a chance.” Angela gave a smile as she looked up at the sky. She looked at the dying sun. “And I like to think that there is a chance for you to see that by killing your brother you are killing yourself; that your rage and anger… it only destroys.” She looked back at Amara.

“And you think you know everything?”

Angela looked at Amara and shook her head, “No. I don’t presume to know everything. That is hubris.” She paused and looked aside to think a moment before looking back. “But I know what it’s like to kill in rage and hatred. I’ve done it and I’ve almost destroyed myself though I didn’t know it at the time.”

“You destroy yourself?”

“Yes.” Angela felt her throat convulse for a moment before she continued, “I almost did when my mate was first killed. From others, I was told that it nearly tore the fabric of time and space.”

“You’re describing the time I… set you on this.” Amara turned away to think about it. She looked back at Angela. “Is his your revenge?”

“No. All I want is for you to see a little.” Angela started to reach out but was stopped. She felt weak and moaned a little as she bent over. The scene faded before her as she struggled to stand up.

Amara noticed everything. She saw the pain and the flickering. “You aren’t really here.”

“Impossible for me since I am not what you say I once was. I am only using what I know and that…” Angela paused as she braced herself. She put a hand on her abdomen and took a couple of deep breaths. She looked at Amara and said, “That is to project my persona to wherever I want to be. I have gone on too long…”

Amara gasped as she reached forward to help. She kneeled in front of the woman who was risking a lot being here. She grasped her arms. “You come here with a risk and for what? Why?”

Angela looked up with a smile. “Because I believe that you don’t want the end to come.” She lowered her head and closed her eyes. She didn’t want to leave Amara at this point but…

Amara watched as the projection of Angela disappear. All she could see though was the smile on the woman’s face and the look. She couldn’t understand it.

~0~0~0~0~

“You are warm. You always have been warm.”

Angela hummed as she leaned against Chuck, more to be his support as they waited. “Call it the curse of being a dhampir. Normal body temp runs like a low grade fever in normal humans.” She took a breath as she kept her eyes closed.

Chuck hummed a laugh at that. He looked over at Sam as he leaned against Angela. He murmured, “Sam is still upset.”

Angela opened her eyes and looked at her husband and mate. “I know. But he understands. He doesn’t like it but…” She caught Sam’s gaze and gave a gentle, tired and reassuring smile.

“He understands,” Chuck replied softly. He watched Sam’s expression before he turned to look at the news being shown. “It always amazes me how you both just seem to communicate. The level of trust…”

“I always have. Since the first time I formally met them.” Angela studied her husband along with Rowena and Crowley. “It hasn’t changed and I don’t foresee it changing in the future.” She sighed, “I wish it hadn’t come to this. Dean is like my brother.”

Chuck shifted to look at her. Even in her tired state, she was saddened by the whole thing. She didn’t want Amara to die any more than he did. He asked, “You think it made a difference?”

Angela turned to look at Chuck. Before she could say anything she found herself back in that park and she was standing next to Chuck. She looked around and saw Amara and Dean. Dean looked a little stunned at seeing her there. She grasped Chuck to keep him from falling over and looked at Amara and asked, “What’s going on?”

Her question was answered when Chuck and Amara started reconciling. She was surprised that she was there since she knew that the soul bomb was inside of Dean and it was literally a ticking time bomb. And she figured Sam guessed where she was since she started to feel his panic.

“Shifa’?”

Angela turned to look at Amara, surprised she called her by the name given to her by the Egyptian pantheon that adopted her. She looked at Darkness and noted how lighter she seemed. That darkness and rage melting away. It had her a little worried since she wasn’t sure about what to think of the whole situation. She raised her brow at the pair.

“This is what you meant, isn’t it?” Amara gestured at herself and Chuck. “Having faith even when it seems hopeless.”

“Um…” Angela wasn’t sure where this was going but the smile was reassuring. “Yeah. It’s what I meant about why I showed up here. But it essentially applies to anyone.”

“I see.” Amara looked at Angela with a smile. “And I thank you for that. Before Dean came, you had me thinking.” She paused a moment before walking towards Angela and put a hand on her shoulder. “Which is why I want to ask something of you.”

Angela glanced at Dean for a moment before looking at Chuck. He wasn’t in distress except for the fact that he was still in a declining state of health. She then looked at Amara and asked, “What is it that you ask?”

It was formal sounding but Angela felt that it was right to do so. It made things clear and no mistakes in intent. Plus it just sounded right. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that they had all been together when the world began or just whatever. She had learned over the years to take what was given since often the larger picture wouldn’t be revealed until further down the road and sometimes it was the little things that made all the difference.

Amara looked at Angela and noted her hesitancy but she didn’t blame her. She lifted her hand and stroked her cheek. “I ask if you would help me one last time.” She gestured with her eyes towards Chuck. “Please.”

Angela glanced at Chuck and then at Amara. She understood what was being asked and what it would entail. It would be a serious drain on her energy and…

“Your baby will be fine,” Amara said in a low voice. She looked at Angela with a look that to outsiders could seem intimate. “You are a healer. I am not but I can give the one thing that could mean the difference.”

Angela looked at Amara, not shrugging off the hand but rather accepting it. It was a risk but… She nodded her assent. She allowed herself to be led by the hand to where Chuck was waiting. She looked at the man and nodded when he nodded at her. She turned to look at Dean and give him a reassuring smile, unaware that it was similar to the one she gave when she followed Sam into the Cage. She turned back towards brother and sister. “Are you ready?”

Chuck looked at her and said, “Nothing will happen to you or the little one.”

“And I trust you both to that.” Angela smiled at both of them and noted the slight look of surprise. She looked downward and closed her eyes and took a breath. When her head was facing them her eyes opened and flared to reveal she had tapped into her powers. She lifted her hands to reveal that the tattoos underneath her wrists were glowing.

Most of the time, Angela could tap into the basics. The truly great feats were often a product of her not exactly sure what happened. If she wanted to think about it, it had something to do with her origins, the one ones she couldn’t remember. But there were the laws of the universe as well that played a role. It only proved that one couldn’t truly know everything. She did know how to tap into her abilities and be able to use them as necessary to do her job of protecting the innocent. Now she knew how to do it but knowing exactly what she was doing… it felt like instinct.

Putting a hand on Amara and Chuck’s shoulders she held still and looked ahead while Amara channeled her power into Chuck. At one point she looked up at the sky and watched with a slight smile as the sun began to shine brightly again. She only looked down when Amara was finished with what she was doing. She felt her power recede, her tattoos dimmed. The last to dim were her eyes and with that, the exhaustion hit. She gasped as Amara and Chuck held her upright.

“Angie?”

“I’m alright, Dean.” Angela turned to let him know that it was okay. She straightened up even though it was taking a lot of effort to do so. She took a couple of breaths and gave a wan reassuring smile. She looked at Chuck and Amara and nodded, “I’m guessing and assuming that this is good for now?”

“Yes,” Chuck replied as he held onto her. “You’ve done well, Angie. More than what anyone ever asks of you.” He looked at his sister and nodded, “And now it is time we give back to you.”

Angela looked at the pair before she suddenly found herself back in the bar. It was so sudden that it didn’t help her already weakened state and her legs buckled. She was hardly aware of the fact that Sam’s arms caught her and were the only thing holding her up. She looked around trying to make sense of what just happened before she passed out.

She found herself waking up in the back seat of the Impala and they were in the bunker. She frowned a bit as the back door opened and Sam reached in to the car to pick her up. She didn’t resist but she did signal that she was awake but he wasn’t quite listening just yet. “Sam,” she said softly.

She was set on her feet but she was still shaky and almost fell. She looked up to see Sam’s concerned look and felt his anxiety. She tried to be reassuring, “I’m okay. Just a little dizzy.”

“What happened?”

Angela paused when she heard the words in her head. She gave a slight shake to focus on what Sam was asking her. She managed to get out, “I was with Chuck.”

“I figured that.”

Angela looked at Sam and saw his jaw twitch slightly. She knew he was trying to deal with a myriad of emotions. The least she could do was be reassuring about one thing that would concern him the most. “She didn’t hurt me,” she said. “Amara didn’t hurt me.”

“Then why are you…” Sam calmed himself down, not wanting to shout. He glanced at Castiel as they headed towards the entrance. “What happened?”

Angela took a breath and said, “I saw Amara. I was with Chuck. She… she wanted to make amends.”

It was not exactly a walk and talk but she managed to explain that Amara and Chuck made amends with each other. She had just finished describing what she had done to help Amara heal Chuck when they entered the bunker. “And she said that… as a thank you… everything will be okay.” She placed a hand on her abdomen as Sam helped her down the stairs.

“Do you know what she meant by that?”

Angela looked at Castiel before looking at Sam. She then said, “It was her gift to me.” She moved over towards a chair to sit. She put a hand on her lower back and reached for the chair and eased herself down with Sam helping her. She rubbed her abdomen since the baby decided to kick her a little. She said what had been spoken to her in Enochian and then repeated it for Sam’s benefit, “The baby is safe.”

That relieved a lot from Sam’s mind and Angela could tell. She held onto him when she stood up to try and head to their room. Before she could do that, however, there was a flash of light and Castiel was gone. Her eyes widened in reaction before her nose caught the scent she had missed. She turned to see a woman standing there and with a gun pointed at them.

Angela had guns pointed at her more times than she would like. She had been shot, stabbed, beaten, burned and buried alive. Having a gun in her face made her tense up but she was calm about it as she listened to the woman tell Sam that the Men of Letters was doing something about the events that had happened. She couldn’t help but snort at that and stepped forward, her tiredness forgotten. She looked at the woman and said, “So they send Madam Librarian? How are you Antonia?”

If there was confusion in the ranks, Angela wasn’t going acknowledge it. Her attention was focused on the intruder. She gave a slight smile and added, “Thought you knew manners. You were always insistent that I give you that much.”

“You know her Angie?”

Angela didn’t look at Sam but instead kept her gaze on the person she knew only from the first moment she made herself known. She wasn’t going to tell Sam that she was tapping into her abilities since she picked up the fact that the woman was not going to be the most pleasant of company. “You could say that,” she replied.

“They told me you would do this. Play mind games,” the woman replied.

“Process of observation. Thought you librarians of the Men of Letters would respect that. Then again you turn your pompous ass noses up at those that actually do the fighting.” She took a step forward.

“Not another step.”

Angela would have said something but Sam stood in front of her. He wasn’t directly in front of her but his posture was clear as he strode forward. She glanced around and saw Shadow and Gideon edging forward, growling and ready to attack if she gave the word. The other puppies were somewhere, hiding and their mother was standing guard over them. She looked at the woman and said, “You are outnumbered here so I think you should put down the gun.”

“No. I’m here to take the Winchesters in.”

It was out. Angela sighed as she adjusted her position. She noted the woman’s body tense when Sam stepped forward again. She waved at Gideon and Shadow to stay back just in case. She looked at the woman and closed her eyes as Sam said that the woman was not going to shoot. She tilted her head slightly as time seemed to stand still as she heard the breathing of the woman. Her eyes opened to flare her golden orbs the moment she heard the gunshot.

_Do not be afraid. Everything will be alright. All you have to do is fight and live._


End file.
